libralady

Hello brilliant people! I hope you dont mind me asking for a little bit of advice because it seems so trivial compared to the strength and courage that you all poscess, but its bugging me. I hope you dont mind. Basically i grew up in an alcoholic family. I was the only girl in a crowd full of boys and as a result, i had to grow up fast. My fathers drunken rages meant that i would protect my mum. I would cook clean, and make sure that every thing was just so. My father would call be a **** tramp etc ( you get the picture) and beat me just for the sheer hell of it. My mother did nothing. As a result of this, i left home and went to university where i got my degree and as a result of a low self esteem, proceeded to marry the biggest waste of space. Anyway, when my soon was born, he packed up and left and from that day to this has shown no interest. I've got strong and independant and through god and my own refusal to lay down and die, i've got my own house and car,pay my own bills and have a beautiful son that makes me so proud every day. Anyway, i've fallen in love with a man and have had a brilliant relationship for the past six years. He's kind considerate loving and very funny. he makes me laugh every day.My son adores him and visa versa. However he's 29 years older than me and an alcoholic. He has been sober for 16 years for which im proud. Hes divorced with 3 children who also love him. My question is, does alcohol affect the person? He gets tired very easily, and has to sleep most of the day. I love him, so that doesnt bother me, but sometimes i feel resentful because his ex wife had the best of him and i feel that ive got the leftovers. how selfish and self absorbed am i? Anyway im so sorry for intruding in anyones pain, but every one of you are to be admired and respected for your strength and great hearts! Thank you. God bless you all

best

I am thinking that age and health have more to do with his sleeping then anything else. Even when I was younger and in better health, my job took what energy I had from me and my poor sleep habits had me take naps after dinner.
Not drinking at the time, full days work, improper sleep, and at age 28 I was taking naps. I now do less work but sleep about the same and my health isn't where it should be. No naps now, because the demand isn't there.
Exercise, proper diet, proper sleep habits, Check up with the DR.
After all that, you could find he is just who he is and naps are part of his way.

If you feel your getting left overs, maybe you are settling for less then you deserve?

If he is as wonderful as you say he is, you are getting a wonderful man in your life. He is older and that can mean, he has improved. Not left overs but an improved model.
I would look at it as...she had to pluck the feathers of the chicken, you are getting a finished diner.

Zoey

I think a Dr's checkup is needed. Many things can cause tiredness. I became very low on oxygen, wanted to sleep a lot, I wasn't getting enough oxygen when I went into deep sleep. I am on oxygen just at night. Called Hypoxemia.
There are lots of other things that cause tiredness. Does her ever nod off while driving?? Did you try putting that question on Google search or on Ask.com ??
Usually alcoholics become very well, if they eat right.