Today
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Glasgow
Posts: 9
Today
Today I admitted I am an alcoholic.
Today I poured away the half bottle of dark rum I would drink tonight along with 6 cans of lager.
Today I phoned AA.
Today I finally realised the damage my drinking was doing to my marriage.
Today I wept before my wife.
Today I vowed not to drink myself senseless tonight.
Today I missed my children going to school for the last time.
Tonight I will not have a drink.
Tonight I will probably shake and not sleep.
I vow I will never drink again.
Kev
Today I poured away the half bottle of dark rum I would drink tonight along with 6 cans of lager.
Today I phoned AA.
Today I finally realised the damage my drinking was doing to my marriage.
Today I wept before my wife.
Today I vowed not to drink myself senseless tonight.
Today I missed my children going to school for the last time.
Tonight I will not have a drink.
Tonight I will probably shake and not sleep.
I vow I will never drink again.
Kev
We all need each other.
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: The road of happy destiny.
Posts: 2,294
Hello there, Kev--Welcome to SR! Glad you found us. This is a wonderful place for support and encouragment. You have made the very important first step, admitting you are an alcoholic and that you need help. I hope you will post some more and let us get to know you. So many of us have been right where you are right now. My name is Laura and I am a gratefully recovering alcoholic with a precious 21 months of sobriety. It hasn't been easy, but one day at a time I have learned to change my thinking and, for the most part, have had the obsession to drink removed.
Hang in there. I would suggest checking out the Alcoholism forum here. In particular, the thread near the top called, "Quitting, what to expect." Please don't be afraid to reach out to us. We're here for you....
Hugs--
Hang in there. I would suggest checking out the Alcoholism forum here. In particular, the thread near the top called, "Quitting, what to expect." Please don't be afraid to reach out to us. We're here for you....
Hugs--
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: western canada
Posts: 1,441
Hey Kev...
Welcome to SR...
Sounds like you had a moment of blinding clarity around your disease.
Blessings on that.
It's great that you called AA... cause for me... it was only by looking at my disease on other people... that I could see where and how it was working in my life...
and it was only by following the path of those who successfully left it behind that I managed to go on in a better way.
Stepping back from the brink...
Saying a prayer for you... for continued resolve to go to any length to get well.
Welcome to SR...
Sounds like you had a moment of blinding clarity around your disease.
Blessings on that.
It's great that you called AA... cause for me... it was only by looking at my disease on other people... that I could see where and how it was working in my life...
and it was only by following the path of those who successfully left it behind that I managed to go on in a better way.
Stepping back from the brink...
Saying a prayer for you... for continued resolve to go to any length to get well.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Rindge, NH
Posts: 16
Welcome to SR, Kev. I have just about 4 months of sobriety so I relate to what your saying immensely. It looks like you've taken a GIANT step on your road to recovery. By admitting that you are an alcoholic, you've taken Step One already. I know that when I did this, it was a huge sigh of relief to get that monkey off my back. Now I work with my sponsor on the twelve steps through the Big Book, and I am slowly getting my life back. Keep on posting Kev !!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Glasgow
Posts: 9
Thank you for your welcomes....I'm sorry my introductory post was worded rather abruptly.
I am not in the drinking time zone yet, so all is well, but I am dreading tonight and know it will be killer, I will keep posting.
Thanks Kev
I am not in the drinking time zone yet, so all is well, but I am dreading tonight and know it will be killer, I will keep posting.
Thanks Kev
Little Girl Found
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: North Andover, MA
Posts: 567
Hey Kev--
I wanted to welcome you as well! Take a look around this forum--there's a ton of information and support to aid you in your new life! That first step of admitting our problem, then seeking guidance is one of the hardest!
Oh, and you don't have to apologize--your first post wasn't abrupt!
Sometimes true eloquence comes with saying only what is necessary and nothing else! You definitely got your point across.
Take care!
Danielle
I wanted to welcome you as well! Take a look around this forum--there's a ton of information and support to aid you in your new life! That first step of admitting our problem, then seeking guidance is one of the hardest!
Oh, and you don't have to apologize--your first post wasn't abrupt!
Sometimes true eloquence comes with saying only what is necessary and nothing else! You definitely got your point across. Take care!
Danielle
In Paradise!
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Pair-O-Dice, CA
Posts: 432
Hey Kev!
Welcome to SR and the post.
If I may just make a comment on something from my experience in AA now for over 21 years & 8 years on continuos sobriety. May I comment on one thing?
I am not correcting you but would like to add to what I read. That statement is called "fortune telling", and a big order! We never know whats going to happen tomorrow. My crystal ball broke down awhile back, still down as we speak matter of fact. If you have any kind of slip would be think yourself a failure? Recovery road has a few bumps in it or it should since this is all real new to everyone in early recovery.
But JUST FOR TODAY I will not be taking a drink or drug, and I will pursue a better life without the use of drugs and alcohol. I will be in service, to my fellow addicted folks.
Excellent you have found SR, and look forward to more posts from you.
Cheers,
~GB
Welcome to SR and the post.
If I may just make a comment on something from my experience in AA now for over 21 years & 8 years on continuos sobriety. May I comment on one thing?
I vow I will never drink again.
But JUST FOR TODAY I will not be taking a drink or drug, and I will pursue a better life without the use of drugs and alcohol. I will be in service, to my fellow addicted folks.
Excellent you have found SR, and look forward to more posts from you.
Cheers,
~GB
You're never alone!!
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 2,191
Welcome Kev,,
So very happy to have you here at SR!!!
Wonderful place by the way !!!!
Sounds like you took some steps
today, to improve your life.!!
Great job!!
It takes work..
That's for sure,
but it's all good work
and so worth it,,,
Hope you stick around here at SR!!
Check out all the forums..
Just don't overwhelm yourself Kev,,
don't say you will never drink again,
that's a tall order, one that will seem huge at times,
Just take it a day at a time..
That's all we really have,
Just for Today,,,,
Love and Prayers,
Beck
So very happy to have you here at SR!!!
Wonderful place by the way !!!!
Sounds like you took some steps
today, to improve your life.!!
Great job!!
It takes work..
That's for sure,
but it's all good work
and so worth it,,,
Hope you stick around here at SR!!
Check out all the forums..
Just don't overwhelm yourself Kev,,
don't say you will never drink again,
that's a tall order, one that will seem huge at times,
Just take it a day at a time..
That's all we really have,
Just for Today,,,,
Love and Prayers,
Beck
1 bite&all resistance crumbles
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: IRELAND
Posts: 2,208
Kev
Keep posting!!! Good for you, you've done all the right things, just keep it in the day and get to a meeting, cause that's how many of us get through a night, quite happily, not drinking! You will be amazed at the lift you can leave...I echo Greenbug too KEEP IT IN THE DAY!!!!
Love
Cathy31
x
Keep posting!!! Good for you, you've done all the right things, just keep it in the day and get to a meeting, cause that's how many of us get through a night, quite happily, not drinking! You will be amazed at the lift you can leave...I echo Greenbug too KEEP IT IN THE DAY!!!!
Love
Cathy31
x
Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: On my way to a better life "one day at a time"
Posts: 69
Hi Kev and welcome to SR.
I agree with Cathy about going to a meeting tonight. Have you called A.A.? I know you have the #. I think you will feel better if you can make a meeting tonight.
Also my motto "never say never". It's to much like everyone was saying. Good food for thought about that subject on this thread.
You can come here too!!! That is another way to get your mind of the drink.
I hope to see ya around and get to know you. BTW I really liked what you wrote in your first post.
I agree with Cathy about going to a meeting tonight. Have you called A.A.? I know you have the #. I think you will feel better if you can make a meeting tonight.
Also my motto "never say never". It's to much like everyone was saying. Good food for thought about that subject on this thread.
You can come here too!!! That is another way to get your mind of the drink.
I hope to see ya around and get to know you. BTW I really liked what you wrote in your first post.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Racine, WI
Posts: 206
Hi Kev........I liked your first post very much......direct and to the point. You don't need much more than that in my book.
Anyway, welcome and stick around cuz this place is absolutely LOADED with support and genuine caring.
I, personally, am proud of you for taking this HUGE first step......welcome to the world of recovery!!!
Anyway, welcome and stick around cuz this place is absolutely LOADED with support and genuine caring.
I, personally, am proud of you for taking this HUGE first step......welcome to the world of recovery!!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Glasgow
Posts: 9
Thank you everybody.
So here I am hours into drinking time and not had a drink. It seems surreal and why do I keep looking at the clock? I seem to be constantly glancing at it. I know the answer, I know by now how much I should have had to drink.
The routine is the same night after night, just after eight, kid myself I'll just have a few drinks and finally round off the night, at around 2 in the morning totally plastered.
Here lies the real kicker to my situation, I actually work offshore where we are not allowed to drink so every time I come home I simply make up for lost time. This time I have been home 4 weeks and tonight is the first night I have been sober at this time of night.
This is the person my family has lived with for the last 6 years, the guy who comes home and gets plastered from the moment he walks through the door, but hey it's ok cos I stop drinking when I go back offshore.
I guess I would be the stereotypical binge drinker, but I binge for weeks.
I am due back to work next week and will try to stay sober up to that point, but the real weakness is that when I am due to come home, I feel joy, not at anything else other than the fact I am free to drink again.
Sorry to go on and I’m sure all have you have horror stories to tell but I just wanted to write this down.
Kev
So here I am hours into drinking time and not had a drink. It seems surreal and why do I keep looking at the clock? I seem to be constantly glancing at it. I know the answer, I know by now how much I should have had to drink.
The routine is the same night after night, just after eight, kid myself I'll just have a few drinks and finally round off the night, at around 2 in the morning totally plastered.
Here lies the real kicker to my situation, I actually work offshore where we are not allowed to drink so every time I come home I simply make up for lost time. This time I have been home 4 weeks and tonight is the first night I have been sober at this time of night.
This is the person my family has lived with for the last 6 years, the guy who comes home and gets plastered from the moment he walks through the door, but hey it's ok cos I stop drinking when I go back offshore.
I guess I would be the stereotypical binge drinker, but I binge for weeks.
I am due back to work next week and will try to stay sober up to that point, but the real weakness is that when I am due to come home, I feel joy, not at anything else other than the fact I am free to drink again.
Sorry to go on and I’m sure all have you have horror stories to tell but I just wanted to write this down.
Kev
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