cwohio

Next Sun. is my wedding anniversary - would have been 15 years. I find I am "anticipating" the emotions that will come when that day arrives. I am still battling with the anger and sadness at the disease that took him. I am grateful that it falls on a Sun. for I will be going to church with my mother-in-law and I know that will give me some comfort. I thought about starting a scrapbook. Any other suggestions besides prayers to help me thru this?

Thank you for listening!

FriendofBill

To let go of all that I was bound too as it related to my ex....I wrote a letter to him, then took it to a lovely park, and burned it in a fire pit, and blew the ashes into the sky.

It helped to get my feelings out and send them off to the universe. It gave me a feeling of freedom and peace.

Pr...Ive always wanted to try this,,but havent.....write down your feelings for him, of love, the good memories, tie them to some helium balloons and release them, play some nice music and maybe have some friends there for support.

Your such a sweet, loving woman, Christie.....you will find a way to get thru that day...and today as well. I hope these ideas are helpful to you!

cwohio

FOB - thanks - i too have read many posts that have suggested the helium balloon idea and have wanted to do something like that - maybe next week will be the day i finally do it. aww geez, now i'm sitting here bawling - the tears just seem to come at the most unexpected moments. i guess i still have many feelings to deal with and maybe this will be a constructive way to do it. thank you!

splendra

I think what you have planned is a good start. I think it would be good to go out to lunch too maybe with your MIL?

I would imagine that you will be feeling lots of feelings and knowing you; you will flow with them and trust your HP to get you through it.

Probably keeping it simple will help you get through the day more than anything...

gelfling

I can't add anything to the above except that they're amazing ideas.

Blessings

cwohio

thanks splendra - i will do what feels "right" when the time comes. excellent suggestion about going to lunch - we haven't done that in a while.

reader

Hi Christie, what about going out to dinner that night with a friend. That way your not home alone and feeling sad and sorry for yourself. Or what about doing something nice for yourself, like a massage or a spa treatment. something positive!!! Just a thought, I will be thinking of you, and praying for peace in your soul. With love, Kerry

Pick-a-name

I would expect it to be a very hard day, and to give yourself "permission" to indulge in the hurt, grief etc whatever comes up........good AND bad. Hopefully the good memories will be there,too. You are in my prayers. I hope you will feel the love that all of us here at SR have for you and that it gives you comfort.

cwohio

kerry & pick - thanks for the response.

you know, being the the codie & ACOA i am, my first reaction is to ignore the feelings, you know, they'll go away, but i know as i put on my recovery hat, that this is how i have been operating all my life and it has done nothing but caused me trouble. i've cried more the past 2 months than i probably have in many, many years. dealing with my feelings - good & bad - in a constructive way is still very new to me so i stumble quite a bit. i hate that i allowed the disease to take the center stage!!! i can only go forward and with the help of my HP, that's what i need to do.

equus

I think the scrapbook is a lovely idea, those years were real and you should be free to remember them well. I think love we give brings back it's own rewards and remembering those, remembering even your own kindness is a good thing. I hope the day brings some surprising peace too - I don't know why but I have a feeling there will be moments of real peace along with grieving, perhaps because this will be a year when you know he's at peace.

We will all be thinking of you.

susane1408

Hi Christie,

I'm not sure how I came by it but I've got your anniversary in my diary, I will be thinking of you on the day.
Spend some time in the early morning remembering all that was good, look at your wedding pictures;share your memories with the man that you loved.
Take all those thoughts and feelings to the church and give them into safe hands.
Then spend the rest of the day with people that you love and think of not what might have been but all that there could be.
love Susane

cwohio

equus & susane - thank you for those thoughts - it means so much to get feedback from my "family"!

quietsins

when I know I am going to be very blue, I usually plan on making someone unfortunates day a bit brighter. Leaving food for a needy family, taking a couple kids in the neighborhood to buy mittens, or giving an elderly person in my area flowers just to brighten their day.

Seems if I keep busy and keep out of my own head. I am much more serene.

quietsins

cwohio

what a wonderful idea quietsins - thank you!

best

Don't bury it. Live through your emotions.

The things listed above are wonderful. Ideas to live with.

It is your day... do something, just don't sit there.

Like the song says... its my party and i will cry if i want to. You would cry to if it happened to you.

Know that the people of SR are here. You will always have someone who understands and wil listen. You will find that at church as well *smile*

FormerDoormat

I think your scrapbook idea is lovely. Just think of all the memories that will come flooding back as you search for photos for your book.

((((Christy)))))

cwohio

best - yep gotta go thru the emotions, not around them and going to church always makes me feel so much better!

FD - thank you for response - i am still praying for you!

Savana 54

I don't have much more to add that hasn't already been suggested.

Just know that you are in my thoughts and prayers

(((Christie)))

equus

Thinking of you Christy...

cwohio

thanks guys - i appreciate your thoughts!