Cajun girl

Today is a new day. I can't tell you how much I've been trying these Al-Anon slogans to try and not let my fear escalate. I haven't been able to make it to in person meetings from working 2 jobs (have to for right now). I've come to something though, and wanted to check this out with ya'll (UPDATE: My A moved out yesturday).

We have to come to a point where we bury the old. It seems we hang on to unhealthy relationships often times because of our OWN fear. If my A works his program, and sometime down the line we can develop a NEW relationship, fine. BUT in the meantime ALL I can do is take care of me and my kids, let go and bury the old.... Fear keeps me from moving on from the obsessing thoughts, and fantasies and putting pressure on him. (never works, he screens my calls!!!).

Let Go, Let God right?

A question though, What do we do when we are doing the One Day AT A Time thing and the days lasts FOREVER........ (LOL)

Ann

Cajun

Then we work this program one hour at a time, or one minute sometimes. We just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and sometimes take two steps back, but we persevere.

The good thing about us codependents - we are stubborn, persevering, and determined!!!! All we have to do is change our focus from THEM to US, and these become assets instead of liabilities. We take the lemons and make lemonade.

Line yourself up with good things to do to keep busy and happy - see "How To Have Fun When You Really Don't feel Like It". It works - one micro-second at a time.

(((Cajun)))

Rose56

CG, I agree with anns. Sometimes life is no fun, but if we are working the program we are moving forward and the future will be bright. Because it won't depend on anyone else but us. Hang in there, and keep chugging forward.

Laceejoe

Cajun---I hope your day is improving somewhat. Listen with your heart to what anns and the others suggest----they are such wise women. Been there with the 2-job thing----and I know how exhausting it can be. Doesn't let much time to think of anything but sleep!! Some days do seem to last forever, and all we can do is pray for peace during our hours of rest. Please try to get hold of some Alanon literature if you can't make it to meetings right now because of your work schedule. It's easy to fit in the small readings for each date, and it does help alot. I have a habit of just opening my books randomly to a page, and 9 times out of 10 the reading is something that I really needed for that day in my life. GO FIGURE!!! Anyway, the holidays are here, Cajun---and time to wrap your arms around the family and friends that love you in the way you need. Hopefully, you think of us in there somewhere-----and will reach out to us when the need is the greatest!! Blessings to you and your family!!