kerry22

Well Im starting again. This desease really plays some mean mind tricks on you. I had two weeks and then when i had a job interview and got the job i decided to celebrate. Well its been sneaking trips to the liqueor store. My mom is finding out that im acting sneaky again. My bf found an empty bottle in my room. Well i can't take hurting my family and everyone i care about again. Im getting back to aa meetings and am going to go everynight. I don't have my car. So my parents are taking me everywhere. Cuz now they don't trust me. I can't trust myself either. I feel selfish, horrible and just mentally sick. I can't wait to get back to aa. When i stopped going to aa my relapse crept up on me. Now i know that i need to go all the time and keep it in my life. I love you guys and the fellowship. Please help support me!

Paulie

Be grateful that you are alive to start again, some don't make it back.

I am proud of you for trying.....trying is doing!!!

bikewench

Kerry....
got endless love and endless support here.. ;o)

it's awesome that you recognize that you can't do it alone...
I had to surrender to that as well.. more than once..

and we are not "bad" when we relapse...
just haven't gotten to the point of doing it a better way yet...
but.. that time will come...
if we don't give up...
one day at a time... we will get better...

so glad you came back to share your journey...

praying for you.

wantneeda

(((kerry)))
this could be your last day 1!

just stay in today don't concern yourself with tomorrow or the days after that
with you all the way
hugs, Wendy

4health

Welcome back!! Congrats on getting back into the program that works for you. Stick with it! If it aint broke...

Hugs to you!

REZ

The disease can make up many reasons to drink or drug: to celebrate, because I feel bad, because I feel good, because I deserve it, because I'm at a party, because I'm going sailing, because, because, because. Bottom line: for an addict/alcoholic there is no good reason to drink or drug. Keep coming back to SR and to meetings (AA/NA).

hopealwayz

Welcome back.
One day at a time we can beat this thing.

mchockfan

Don' beat yourself up, just pick yourself up. Use it as one last final example of why you don't drink anymore. That's where I have always gone wrong in the past, forgetting how bad the alcohol/drug is. I alsmost "talked" myself into one beer this weekend, even an NA Beer, I just love the taste. I did'nt and it was because I reminded myself how bad that one beer made me last time.

never quit quiting, until you get it right. wish it hadn't took me 30 some years to learn that. now I got 6 weeks not having one beer at a time. BEST WISHES

CarolD

Welcome back....

Sounds like a good plan...works great for me.

Digger

Starting over, I guess we have all done it, I started again 6days ago for the uptenth time. your right about meetings keep at it. Sounds like you have some good folks! Good luck, welcome back and keep coming back.
Keep on digging
Dave

tink360

Hey there Kerry...it seems that we may have some things in common...My parents also drive me around and i too cant take hurting my family and everyone that i care about...My parents take me to NA meetings and the funny thing is that if i dont go for a while they are the ones that take notice and tell me i should go...they are the most valuable support system i have and ive grown to use them in everyway that i can...i communicate with them when i feel bad and when i feel good and if it werent for them i dont know where id be now...sounds like you could use your parents to that same advantage...if they live with you theyll be the ones who can see changes in you good or bad before you might even notice...maybe set something up with them to help you towards your recovery...ive learned through my recovery that parents arent just there to nag at me and ruin my love live ( lol ) they can be there to help me too...take care and stay strong...

ChrisMan

(((Kerry)))

Be gentle with yourself and know that you have a lot of support here.
It's great that you are going to AA meetings -- I don't know what I would do without my meetings -- they are a real support.

Luckyv2

(((((Kerry)))))

I am glad that you are back and hell I could go to 4 meetings in a day and leave the last one and find myself drunk and using before I even got home LOL. I think pretty much all of us have had a slip (sobriety looses its priority) and I have had my far share and I know that there is another one out there also if I choose to go back. I have to choose sobriety sometimes 30 times a day in the beginning. I am not around much anymore but I will do my best to help support you and I do have ***** and msn messenger also if you ever need to talk, it is there by my names OK...I will send good thoughts your way.

Love Vic

Greenbug

Whoever woke up first this morning has the most time, I will be back tomorrow to congrads on you another 24 then the next day.....

Go slow, and keep it simple.

Peace
~GB

luluabel

((((Kerry))) so glad your back hun ,sending lots of love & support your way xxxxxxx

kerry22

Thank you everyone!
Iam really going to work at this. It sucks how addicts can say that after their uptenth relapse and people role their eyes. But you fall off the horse and you have to get back on again! Love you guys. thanks for the support!