JustMeToday

Here I am with this weight on my shoulders. It needs to go! My family and friends do not realize how much I drink .....daily. I look forward to the magic hour around 7pm to crack one open and another and another. Need to stop cause I am afraid of what I am doing to by liver, kidneys, ect. I am not as sharp as I used to be, scattered, I really need to think about statements before I say they because I have some word finding difficulties......early dementia from alcoholism? I know I have some severe depression to boot. I have a good healthcare plan..but I work for a major healthcare provider in the city sooooo...I a need a dr out my loop. I can not take the chance to be running into the dr at work. plus drs talk. We all talk in this industry, despite privacy regulations. I think I am really afraid that if I admit to a dr what I actually do... I will be sent to a center for recovery. I cant bring myself to do that. I need to do this on my own, because If I am strong enough to drink a 6pack a night, I am strong enough to NOT drink that 6 pack.

How naive do I sound?

Little Missy

Good morning!! Welcome to SR!! Glad you found us!! Not everyone that stops drinking has to go to a treatment center. Just becareful as you detox and seek help is you need to. I didn't have any problem, others will be around with more info!!

Stopping drinking is not a matter of "how strong you are." If it was that, I'm sure most of us would have stopped long ago!! Sobriety is a journey. Lots to learn and a lot of personal growth!!

Stick around, it's a wonderful ride!!
Missy

Jo S

If you can do it on your own i take my hat of to you - and well done -.... but don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it. Good luck .

FriendofBill

If you could have done it on your own, dont you think you already would have?

Instead of spending so much time trying to control who the dr. is, what the dr. MIGHT say and trying to keep everything a secret, why not get your butt in the dr's office and start getting the help you need?

When you are truly sick and tired of being sick and tired, you will stop trying to control everything about you and you will seek recovery. I hope that day is soon.

Turtle

You sound a lot like me. I drank a 6 pack a night too, but 6pm was my magical hour. I also don't want anyone to know because I'm a pretty private person. But 11 days ago I realized I needed to do something, so with a heavy heart, and a hangover, I started searching the net and I found SR. The only person I've told is my husband, the rest of my family will never know, and I'm not going to go to AA. I'll admit it isn't easy to quit, it was much easier to pick up a 6 pack and drink and not think or feel. When I stopped drinking, I had to find something to do with myself during *drinking time*, so I take the dogs out every night. The first 7 days was the hardest, very emotional, very sad. I've picked up a few books and started reading them, I've done research on how alcohol affects the body, and I come here often for support. You can do this if you really want to and we're here for you every step of the way. Hang in there!
Turtle

Luckyv2

((((((JustMeToday))))))

Welcome to SR and we are glad that you are here I have never been to treatment. I have been clean and sober since March 29, 2005 now that is only important for two people. It is important for the newcomer so they can see that it does work and for me to remind me of where I DON'T want to be today...I drank and used that I could NEVER get enough and today I DON"T NEED it today I have a choice...But it took a lot of white knuckeling it in the beginning...This is not easy to do but it is doable...Good luck and I will send some good thoughts your way...

Love Vic

earlybird

You know,....doing this on your own, doesnt mean you dont go to AA meetings to see if they help. AA can give you the support you NEED. Treatment centers are there for people who know already that they need help to quit. Or people who tried on there own first and couldnt do it. Go to some AA meetings. Unless you still have that all too common delusion that you can just "cut back" and not have to quit altogether. That will only prolong your pain. You sound like an alcoholic. Normal drinkers never begin worrying that their drinking is causing them the physical problems you describe.

butterfly123

Hi JustMeToday, I also agree that is you are worried about health risks that you probably do have a problem. I feel the same way, although most days I would drink alot more than a six pack...sometimes 2 or 3 six packs..I have failed before but I know that I can do it...I am going to AA meetings again as I feel that they keep me focused, as well I have found this site to be very helpful. You may not need a treatment center but I would agree that you might need some help. Maybe check out AA and see if you would find that helpful. Best wishes to you!

hopealwayz

(((JustMeToday))) This is a very progressive thing. The sooner you stop the better off you will be. Trust me, it never gets any better, only worse.

I am glad that you are here reaching out! That is a big step in the right direction.

ASH

Hi JustMe, glad you found SR, it has been a great place for me to gain more insight about my disease, alcoholism.

Im lol, because I thought for YEARS no one knew how much I drank, I was so deluded!!!!!! If your anything like me people can smell it off you the next day, not to mention looking hung over, and oh yea, my shaky hands, but no body knew my dirty secret, right

Admiting you have a problem, and coming here are two steps in the right direction.

As others have said, not everyone needs a Dr. or rehab, depends on your personal situation, however, quitting ALONE for the long haul without a some program or support has not worked for most.

Keep coming to SR, keep reading, keep posting, and dont drink, one day at a time, you can find the way

JustMeToday

Hi Turtle, Love your picture!
What else do you do at the "Magical Hour"?

Hello All, Thanks for your comments. I know I have to get my butt to a dr. and try to be strong. I know all the excuses, Im sure you all know them too! Deep breath moment........

earlybird

I find that the best thing to do to help your chances is to let all those close to you know about your disease. Let them know that you are going to try to quit. That way, you have a cheering section. That way you dont leave a back door open to crawl back through if you feel like relapsing. Its much harder to say "This is too difficult,...screw it" if you know that people are watching your progress. If no one knows your trying to quit, then theres less shame in relapse. Or atleast thats the way you will justify it. You want to have a strong foundation because life is BS sometimes and it doesnt care if you are recovering or not. It happens anyways. Trust me,...it can only help you if close friends and family know. Now,...work,...thats another story. I wouldnt spread it around at work. God Bless you,....I know you can do this.

nogard

JustMeToday, welcome to SR You have loads of great advice here all I will add is that it is so worth doing whatever you need to to get sober and claim a life of sobriety.

Kevin

JustMeToday

Hi All!

Its my Magical Hour where I am sooooooooo ready to crack that first drink! I have already started laundry, cleaned the bathrooms (boy they needed it!) hung a new picture on the wall and collected all the garbage and brought it to the curb, walking the dog will be next......

Turtle

Good for you for not cracking that beer!! Get out there with your dog, clean another room, call a friend, stay here and chat with us, do something, anything... YOU CAN DO THIS!!! We're all here behind you

maricamp

Yeah....and our kids had it figured out about their dad bdfore I did!!!

could be the people around you know more than you think they know and just don't know what to do or say. you know....the cow on the middle of the dining room table that everyone just pretends isn't there.

so you might find you have a lot of support in your family and friends if you admit the problem and seek help. mari

Jupiter2

Hi Justme,

I drank for many years about 8 to 12 beers a night and was able to quit on my own in February of this year and have not had a drink since. I don't recommend it necessarily due to medical complications which can occur, but it can be done. Some kind of support group is really needed like AA, though. Plenty of support here on SR, but face to face is really helpful to me.

Wishing you well as you journey to recovery.

Jup.