I want to use
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: somewhere
Posts: 3,384
I want to use
I am having such a bad night and I really have a desire to use. I am trying to play the tape all the way to the end but it isn't working well right now. I was around my mom all day today and really got into a huge fight with her. I just drove off and left.
My head is driving me crazy today.
I am just trying to make it thru tonight.
My head is driving me crazy today.
I am just trying to make it thru tonight.
JUST DO IT!!
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Here Or There
Posts: 7,612
((((Angel))))
I know how hard it is, it is not easy at all but I know that you can do this, I have faith in you. Just remember that there are people that actually do care about you. You said how people in the program tell you to play the tape all the way through to the end LOL I play the end first cause If I play it through I will get stuck in what I would think is the good times LOL. I will send up a thought for you right now.
Love Vic
I know how hard it is, it is not easy at all but I know that you can do this, I have faith in you. Just remember that there are people that actually do care about you. You said how people in the program tell you to play the tape all the way through to the end LOL I play the end first cause If I play it through I will get stuck in what I would think is the good times LOL. I will send up a thought for you right now.
Love Vic
JUST DO IT!!
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Here Or There
Posts: 7,612
Your Welcome Angel and remember that there is always someone around when we feel like using and usually we don't have to look long. Hope that this leaves you cause I do understand. Mine is not so much using as it is death right now.
Love Vic
PS LOL that means I am graduating LOL
Love Vic
PS LOL that means I am graduating LOL
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,476
Hi Angel,
You can get through this night. I had issues with my mom too. Don't let your mom send you to a place that will make you use. It's just not worth it. Hang in there and keep posting.
Love, Anna
You can get through this night. I had issues with my mom too. Don't let your mom send you to a place that will make you use. It's just not worth it. Hang in there and keep posting.
Love, Anna
Member
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Venice, Florida
Posts: 414
Angel,
The good thing I see is that you posted when the urge came upon you. That is a good sign of progress. I DO know how you feel in your struggles with your Mom. I have lots of issues with mine as well. I have learned to avoid things that can trigger me. That doesn't mean I cut myself off from her, but I do avoid situations that will cause me to be alone with her for too long. I take a friend to visit when I go see her. ( She is in a nursing home). I limit how often I see her. I set boundaries on the type of behavior I will tolerate and act on those boundaries.
Did you go to a meeting? That can also help get those thoughts out of your head. Hang in there!
The good thing I see is that you posted when the urge came upon you. That is a good sign of progress. I DO know how you feel in your struggles with your Mom. I have lots of issues with mine as well. I have learned to avoid things that can trigger me. That doesn't mean I cut myself off from her, but I do avoid situations that will cause me to be alone with her for too long. I take a friend to visit when I go see her. ( She is in a nursing home). I limit how often I see her. I set boundaries on the type of behavior I will tolerate and act on those boundaries.
Did you go to a meeting? That can also help get those thoughts out of your head. Hang in there!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: somewhere
Posts: 3,384
Thanks so much Anna and Dawn!
It gets really tough learning how to handle life without using at times, but I guess it does make us stronger when we get through it.
Thanks for posting and I am truly grateful for the support tonight!! I need it so!
Hugs,
Angel
It gets really tough learning how to handle life without using at times, but I guess it does make us stronger when we get through it.
Thanks for posting and I am truly grateful for the support tonight!! I need it so!
Hugs,
Angel
We all need each other.
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: The road of happy destiny.
Posts: 2,294
((((((((Angel)))))))))) Try to remember they are just urges. They will not kill you, but the drug will. The urges will go away if you don't use. Write here some more. Write about exactly what you are thinking. What is using going to do for you? What will NOT using do for you? Take some long, slow deep breaths. Take a hot bath. Go for a walk. Do anything but use. You can make it through this.
Thinking of you!
Hugs--
Thinking of you!
Hugs--
1000 Post Club
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Recoveryville, USA
Posts: 1,297
Maybe this reminder may help you hear whats on the tape better.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ad.php?t=65971
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ad.php?t=65971
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: canada
Posts: 170
Angelhugs, You can do this!! I'm sending you good thoughts!! Each time we beat the urge, you get stronger and it gets weaker.
I know when in the midst of the cravings, nothing else seems to matter, but YOU do matter!!
I know when in the midst of the cravings, nothing else seems to matter, but YOU do matter!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: The Field of Dreams
Posts: 7,249
I pray I will never forget the way I felt when I boarded a plane for New Jersey a little over 5 months ago.I wasnt pretty.In the last 5 months,one day at a time I have not used.A lot of positive things have happened since then,and also some not so good things.Thats life.(((Angelhugs))) I pray you make it.I will never give up on you.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: eden prairie, mn
Posts: 51
hey angel, sorry to hear about your bad day, i know how tough it is dealing with family. i finally divorced mine a few years ago. i had to get away from the insanity that i had grown up with. i know that a lot of people think that that's pretty harsh, but i have been better mental and spiritually since. i know that that's not the answer for a lot of people, but i have to own what is mine and they can keep theirs.
today my home is my sanctuary and what happens out side i try not to bring home. leave it at the door!
this is the place that i find peace. me and kathy have a place that we seat and talk so that each of us can unload. when we are at home we like to be there for each other and our girls. not carrying in our garbage.
i try posting when everyone is a sleep, but i don't get to many replys. but thats OK i enjoy following everyone's progress and celabrating everyone's growth.
just remember that the urge to use will pass
i really enjoy your posts and ESH you share
dean
today my home is my sanctuary and what happens out side i try not to bring home. leave it at the door!
this is the place that i find peace. me and kathy have a place that we seat and talk so that each of us can unload. when we are at home we like to be there for each other and our girls. not carrying in our garbage.
i try posting when everyone is a sleep, but i don't get to many replys. but thats OK i enjoy following everyone's progress and celabrating everyone's growth.
just remember that the urge to use will pass
i really enjoy your posts and ESH you share
dean
Reach Out and Touch Faith
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: On a Sailboat
Posts: 3,871
Originally Posted by icefalcon
i try posting when everyone is a sleep, but i don't get to many replys.
Hope you are having a good night. Enjoy reading your posts.
AngelHugs, praying for you.
Miss Behavin'
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: regina,saskatchewan
Posts: 966
((((Cheryl))))
we love you!!!
stay strong
it just simply won't make anything better, if my memory serves me right......it only makes it worse, the guilt and shame of giving in just SUCKS!!!!!!
you don't have to go there, choose life, you;'ll feel better tomorrow
i'm praying with you
Wendy
we love you!!!
stay strong
it just simply won't make anything better, if my memory serves me right...
...it only makes it worse, the guilt and shame of giving in just SUCKS!!!!!!you don't have to go there, choose life, you;'ll feel better tomorrow
i'm praying with you
Wendy
Heather
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Flint, Michigan
Posts: 57
Angel - Please get in touch with me when you get online today !! I am eagar to know that you are okay !! I hope & pray that you didn't give in to temptation last night. . .but if you did - thats okay - I don't judge you !! I believe that we all have to go through what we have to go through - for find out what direction were suppose to head in !! Please remember that - for any addict/alcoholic not using or drinking is an abnormal state !! But nothing that a spiritual experience cannot conquer !! I love you sweetie - Praying that all is okay with you !! Don't let people rent space in your head !! They bring to much baggage & we have enough of our own already !!!!!! Please let me know if you are okay !! I really hope that you didn't trigger your allergic reaction to the disease !!!!!!
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