Ain't doin nothing right.
Queen of one liners
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: walking beside you! Not in front of you.
Posts: 658
Ain't doin nothing right.
Yep that's what I said.
Ever have one of those days when what ever you have done is seen as wrong by just about everyone around you?
I have added a new trick to my bag of tools. When this happens around and to me, I immediately find something to do that I AM GOOD AT. It sure does beat listening to voices that are negative. For a lot of us who have spent our entire life around active alcoholics, it is easy to buy into their being right and thinking I can't do anything the right way.
For me to quickly recover from undeserved criticism, taking an action step by doing something I know I can do well is the surest way for me to stay in the positive.
Any one else got some hints for us to put into our bag of tricks?
If so, how about sharing them. I love new tools.
Ever have one of those days when what ever you have done is seen as wrong by just about everyone around you?
I have added a new trick to my bag of tools. When this happens around and to me, I immediately find something to do that I AM GOOD AT. It sure does beat listening to voices that are negative. For a lot of us who have spent our entire life around active alcoholics, it is easy to buy into their being right and thinking I can't do anything the right way.
For me to quickly recover from undeserved criticism, taking an action step by doing something I know I can do well is the surest way for me to stay in the positive.
Any one else got some hints for us to put into our bag of tricks?
If so, how about sharing them. I love new tools.
Cruelty-Free
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Body: South Florida Heart: Yosemite National Park
Posts: 914
Thanks for sharing, daffodil!
One of my "tricks" I call Putting Down The 2x4.
When I catch myself being self-critical, I picture whatever word or phrase I'm using to beat myself up written in black marker across a 2x4, with which of course I'm beating the crap out of myself.
Then, when I'm ready, I picture putting down the 2x4 and "turning it over" so that the offending words are no longer visible.
I find this visualization very helpful!
One of my "tricks" I call Putting Down The 2x4.
When I catch myself being self-critical, I picture whatever word or phrase I'm using to beat myself up written in black marker across a 2x4, with which of course I'm beating the crap out of myself.
Then, when I'm ready, I picture putting down the 2x4 and "turning it over" so that the offending words are no longer visible.
I find this visualization very helpful!
Don't get undies in a bunch
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,120
That sounds like any day I think.... This will be a simple job. Start and finsih in 5 minutes. Another thing to check off the to-do list.
Seems that every time I think something will be easy...5 minutes turns into 3 days and a much deeper repair then was seen before removing the covering.
No wise hints, no words of witt... I just end up trudging along and get through the task at hand, till done. Next time I will....
and when next time comes, as it may or may not... I do what needs be done and when the day is finished. I take pride in a day's work done.
Done right or done wrong... I did it and made another day through a storm.
One day at a time, works in so so many parts of life.
Seems that every time I think something will be easy...5 minutes turns into 3 days and a much deeper repair then was seen before removing the covering.
No wise hints, no words of witt... I just end up trudging along and get through the task at hand, till done. Next time I will....
and when next time comes, as it may or may not... I do what needs be done and when the day is finished. I take pride in a day's work done.
Done right or done wrong... I did it and made another day through a storm.
One day at a time, works in so so many parts of life.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Canada
Posts: 727
Thanks for sharring how it works out for you.Way to go.!!!For myself,Doing things right or wrong is only someones ,or even my own,judgement.But its a judgement,nothing more,nothing else.Did i do the best that i could in the moment,i ask myself?If not,i now have insights to myself,.Next time i will do it differently.
Im not responsible for how others think and feel....It comes from what is inside of them.So why bother myself with it?I listen, for i may hear some wisdom,but if its all telling me im wrong,blah,blah,blah,and not helpful infor,i just let it go,and carry on.Someone told me that not everyone will understand me,or even agree with me.The figure was something like 90%..wowow..eh?Serenity prayer is one great tool.....smile
Im not responsible for how others think and feel....It comes from what is inside of them.So why bother myself with it?I listen, for i may hear some wisdom,but if its all telling me im wrong,blah,blah,blah,and not helpful infor,i just let it go,and carry on.Someone told me that not everyone will understand me,or even agree with me.The figure was something like 90%..wowow..eh?Serenity prayer is one great tool.....smile
1000 Post Club
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Recoveryville, USA
Posts: 1,297
Make a list of your friends, the ones who love and support you, the ones who invite you over, who ask your advice, the ones who smile when they see you.
Make a list of your good acts towards others..did you return the shopping cart at the grocery today? Thats a good act.
Make a list of the things you notice you have changed about yourself. More patient these days? Less grumpy? Pay bills ontime?
Look into who YOU are, not who you think OTHERS think you are...thats what mattters.
My self worth is no longer determined what what others think of me, but what I think of me.
Make a list of your good acts towards others..did you return the shopping cart at the grocery today? Thats a good act.
Make a list of the things you notice you have changed about yourself. More patient these days? Less grumpy? Pay bills ontime?
Look into who YOU are, not who you think OTHERS think you are...thats what mattters.
My self worth is no longer determined what what others think of me, but what I think of me.
Queen of one liners
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: walking beside you! Not in front of you.
Posts: 658
WOW Thanks for all the useful tips.
I most certainly will try some new in the future.
It is truly amazing how my emotions can go from one extreme to another just doing the SIMPLE things suggested by the slogan,
KEEP IT SIMPLE.
Love and prayers to all.
I most certainly will try some new in the future.
It is truly amazing how my emotions can go from one extreme to another just doing the SIMPLE things suggested by the slogan,
KEEP IT SIMPLE.
Love and prayers to all.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: DooDooville, USA
Posts: 453
Hi Daffodil,
Keep it simple.......great advice!
We humans tend to complicate things and blow them out of porportion. Making it way more difficult than it is.
My 23 yr old daughter is a singer/songwriter for Universal Records and lives in NYC. She's wise beyond her years. She amazes me with the things and insights she has on life. She's not had an easy life and has had to fight to find her way and, like us all, continues to. But, she's headed on the right path so far and I'm SO proud of her.
She sent this to me one day when I was telling her how I'm still trying to find my way and not the way others want me to live.
I read this every day. She said:
"......trust your first voice. Listen to your heart. Listen to your instincts. Trust in them and go for it. We always struggle with doing the 'right' thing. But what is the 'right' thing? That, to me, is the journey and everyone's journey is different."
Keeping it simple
((hugs))
Keep it simple.......great advice!
We humans tend to complicate things and blow them out of porportion. Making it way more difficult than it is.My 23 yr old daughter is a singer/songwriter for Universal Records and lives in NYC. She's wise beyond her years. She amazes me with the things and insights she has on life. She's not had an easy life and has had to fight to find her way and, like us all, continues to. But, she's headed on the right path so far and I'm SO proud of her.
She sent this to me one day when I was telling her how I'm still trying to find my way and not the way others want me to live.
I read this every day. She said:
"......trust your first voice. Listen to your heart. Listen to your instincts. Trust in them and go for it. We always struggle with doing the 'right' thing. But what is the 'right' thing? That, to me, is the journey and everyone's journey is different."
Keeping it simple
((hugs))
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