LovingMom

OOhhhhh man..was that ever hard? We were all filed in to this room like cattle and then the prisoners were led in single file and just like in the movies..my baby reaches down and picks up the phone handset..IT was like something out of a grade B movie!!

So he doesn't ask me to bail him out..he doesn't cry until he sees me tearing up...then he pleads..dont cry momma...please dont cry. That of course only makes it worse and all too soon the 20 minutes are up and we have to leave. He walks backwards so that he can see me until the last moment before the metal door bangs shut behind him. I stand there and in the company of so many people and my SonnyBoy and horrible ex...I am openly sobbing. A woman...a mother who had been talking with her own son just moments before..stops and gives me a hug. She tells me that it will get easier next time. WHAT??? you mean I gotta come back? lol. Of course I will make that 100 mile round trip again. The horrible ex will be there on wed. and every other saturday. I put a little money on his commissary card..but that's all I chose to do.

Thought for today: Did you know that small town America still uses black and white stripe pants and shirts? Again, I thought that was all just movie stuff. Nope.

nocellphone

I honor you for the strength and courage you have shown in walking through this experience, for keeping your boundaries intact, and for sharing your feelings so honestly.

You are an inspiration...

CarolD

the experience is horrible.

What made it easier for me is to know that was better than an ICU or a mental ward or a grave.

My daughter finally acheived 2 years sober in prison.
Perhaps that was what it took.

Blessings and prayers to you and your family...

minnie

(((Loving Mom)))

I hope for all of you that this experience is the wake up call he needs.

Think of you.

Swanie

I went through the same thing with my brother. At first, it was so horrible to make the 3 hr drive down there and see him in the situation he got himself into. "Little brother" being treated like a criminal! However, after a few trips, I was able to let go a little and started getting a life back. Didnt fill every weekend with trips to go see him; wrote letters instead. Also, being locked up he was able to get sober.

Unfortunately, he hooked up with the same people when he got out-including moving back in with my parents and placing himself right in the middle of their dysfunction (moms enabling and dads abusive, dry-drunk criticsim) and went back to using. Honestly, I hope he gets locked up again because that is the only way I think he will keep from killing himself with drug use.


Please find a support group or talk on here about the feelings of shame and helplessness involved in this type of situation. Also, remember that he is facing the consequences for his behavior. You or I dont do illegal things because we know we wont get away with it and will have to face consequences. Well, the same goes for our loved ones.

I wish you and your son well. I hope you take care of yourself and work your program.

nancymaybe

I'm sorry. Whenever I go to court for my daughter (14 in rehab) I end up crying. It's too hard to see your baby like that, and not being able to pick them up when they fall.

velma929

I had a family member run afoul of the law, too. In the county jail we filed in like that, but the prison had us take off our shoes, pat us down, check to make sure we weren't carrying contraband in our brassieres. I feared that the other prisoners would kill a 76-year-old man, (DUI, vehicular manslaughter) but in fact, some sort of grew to respect him, in their own ways, and stuck up for him.

I wouldn't want to repeat the experience. But I know I thought, at the beginning, "I can't do this," but I could, and did.

FriendofBill

Yes, it is better than being out there hurting himself or another. Hey, God is working in his life cus he is safe at this moment. Who knows, it may just be the reality check to bring him to his knees in surrendering.

Dont doubt that God is doing for him what he cannot do for himself. SOmetimes it comes thru jail or other hardships....

cwohio

((lovingmom)) i pray for serenity for you and may this experience open his eyes.