I just wish for escape
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Parker, CO
Posts: 495
I just wish for escape
Right now, I just wish I could leave this house and go to a new one with my son and start a new life. But it can't be that easy, can it?
Anyone else ever felt like that when at a crossroads in life? I feel like I am standing in the middle of a major intersection trying to determine which way to go. Which road is the best one to travel? What if I go this way and have regrets? What if I act too quickly? What ifs......
Anyone else ever felt like that when at a crossroads in life? I feel like I am standing in the middle of a major intersection trying to determine which way to go. Which road is the best one to travel? What if I go this way and have regrets? What if I act too quickly? What ifs......
too much on my plate!!
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: not kissing frogs anymore
Posts: 646
I know exactly how you feel, although I was never married to him. Try giving it over to your Higher power; maybe it will take a little bit of the burden off of you for awhile.
(((meli)))
Hang in there!
Thoughts and prayers,
Savana
(((meli)))
Hang in there!
Thoughts and prayers,
Savana
Member
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Anaheim,CA
Posts: 549
The moment I read your post, THIS came to mind:
...I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
You know it's late when I'm quoting Frost!
I agree with Savana...think on it, give it to your HP...and take some time to think it all the way through. Then, make the best decisions you can for both you and your son, perhaps you can find the right "one less traveled by" for the two of you!
...I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
You know it's late when I'm quoting Frost!
I agree with Savana...think on it, give it to your HP...and take some time to think it all the way through. Then, make the best decisions you can for both you and your son, perhaps you can find the right "one less traveled by" for the two of you!
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: England
Posts: 3,410
Meli, I believe that we can never make a wrong decision. We choose which way to go based on the facts we have available to us. It is only in hindsight, when we learn something new, that we think we should have taken a different route. As long as we learn from all our experiences, decisions taken are never wrong.
Technically, it CAN be that easy. Emotionally it wouldn't, but then nor would any course af action you take after all you've been through.
The girls are right - give it over to your HP. All will be revealed.
Technically, it CAN be that easy. Emotionally it wouldn't, but then nor would any course af action you take after all you've been through.
The girls are right - give it over to your HP. All will be revealed.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Dallas, Texas
Posts: 48
I thought about this too several times...but as my Therapist told me, I'd only be running from the problems too, without solving them. So I decided to try and Fix Me and then when I feel fixed to sit and think about what I really want to do. The fleeting in me always wants to sell the house and go back home to California. It's my security blanket but truth be told when I think about it...I have nothing there. Sure with my business I can go anywhere, but my friends are here, my daughter's friends are here...and would it be fair to take her away from everything. She'll graduate in 3 yrs...that's nothing...then I can decide where I want to go from there.
Thank about your reasoning...if you really do want to run away just go away for a couple of days to cleanse your mind. It does wonders.
Thank about your reasoning...if you really do want to run away just go away for a couple of days to cleanse your mind. It does wonders.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Litterbox City
Posts: 5,691
meli - yep - i think i see you at those crossroads - i'm there too! the ladies above have said it best. i am giving it over to my HP (REALLY trying)! i know where you are coming from and just know you're in good company!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Dallas, Texas
Posts: 48
Yes, I agree with Dakoda....I have now learned how to refrain from making rash decisions...it was my rash decision that got me here in the first place. Now I am learning to stop and think what my motives are and what I really want to happen from my actions. It's helped me a great deal in dealing with all these emotions. I just take a break and do something to get my mind off things.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Indianapolis, IN
Posts: 15
Originally Posted by meli2005
Right now, I just wish I could leave this house and go to a new one with my son and start a new life. But it can't be that easy, can it?
Originally Posted by meli2005
Anyone else ever felt like that when at a crossroads in life? I feel like I am standing in the middle of a major intersection trying to determine which way to go. Which road is the best one to travel? What if I go this way and have regrets? What if I act too quickly? What ifs......
...it was my rash decision that got me here in the first place. Now I am learning to stop and think what my motives are and what I really want to happen from my actions. It's helped me a great deal in dealing with all these emotions. I just take a break and do something to get my mind off things.
I can relate to both posts! It was the rash decisions I made 14 years ago that caused me to be here today. For the past 2 years I have been standing at this cross road and for today I stay. There isn't much I can do on my own right now. Once I finish my degree I'll get a job and then be able to make a better decision. In the mean time I am struggling to learn as much as I can about the correct way to live with my AH and figure out how to take care of me.
While giving it to the Lord.
Hang in there and I'll say a prayer for ya!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: DooDooville, USA
Posts: 453
At this point in time, Meli, I think it would be running away from the situation.
Getting AWAY mentally from the situation is alot better. Making sure that you're safe and can't hear from him and his problems for awhile is SO important. When the drama is there every day, you can't think clearly. I did the PPO, that worked and is working for me. I can relax now and not think/worry about the xA.
Can you get away for a little while? Go visit some family or just go on a short vacation with your son and yourself? Somewhere where you can think.
My daughter writes songs and is a recording artist. She wrote me this not too long ago and it makes so much sense to me :
When you can mentally get away from the chaos....and take time out for YOU, then you'll be able to "listen to your heart. Trust your first voice".
((hugs))
Getting AWAY mentally from the situation is alot better. Making sure that you're safe and can't hear from him and his problems for awhile is SO important. When the drama is there every day, you can't think clearly. I did the PPO, that worked and is working for me. I can relax now and not think/worry about the xA.
Can you get away for a little while? Go visit some family or just go on a short vacation with your son and yourself? Somewhere where you can think.
My daughter writes songs and is a recording artist. She wrote me this not too long ago and it makes so much sense to me :
~"......trust your first voice. Listen to your heart. Listen to your instincts. Trust in them and go for it. We always struggle with doing the 'right' thing. But what is the 'right' thing? That, to me, is the journey and everyone's journey is different."~
When you can mentally get away from the chaos....and take time out for YOU, then you'll be able to "listen to your heart. Trust your first voice".
((hugs))
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