fishyfishy

Hiya all, i hope you are well I am finding it hard to take things a day at a time, anyone else felt this? All i can picture in my head is NEVER drinking again, not at christmas, new year or birthdays. The thought scares me a bit. Although i never want to drink again as i know what it does to me and the damages it does, i feel i DO want to drink again, is this a need and im getting mixed up with want and need? I DONT want to drink again, but i do! but i wont...


Does this make sense to anyone?

Take care, bonnie,xxx

CAPTAINZING2000

Good day

Glad to meet you.


Growing up, I was always taught to save for everything I wanted. I always lived with a goal in mind. Living for today is a strange concept.

It's easier if, you just break it down for the moment. Right this moment, everything is ok. Don't look at the close of the day, you'll not get to enjoy the day.

i spend all day long, making it the best day ever. It's hard to think of it like this but, I live every day like it's my last. You'll have a lot of better days living like this




HUGS

Chris

lulu70

In my experience, it takes practice to learn to live one day at a time. Sometimes, when I get all freaked about Christmas, or New Years, or this coming weekend for that matter, what helps me is to concentrate on the things I am most grateful for at that moment. Also, it really helps to talk to other people about it, which you are already doing. Are you in a 12-step program? I got a lot of relief from working the steps as well.

Hang in there. It really does get better!

erino134

Bonnie. Probably all if not most of us understand that concept.

This is an extremely hard concept. But I realize that this particular method of thinking is probably one of the greatest things I will get from recovery. (once I really get it.) I spend sooo much time in the future in my mind, that I miss a helluva lot of what is going on right now. I don't know if this just a typical symptom of this disease, or if everyone has this problem and we just will be lucky enough to figure it out along the way. I worry worry worry worry worry worry worry worry about everything I have to get done, everything that may go wrong, everything that may go differently, etc. etc. etc.

So, now that I'm an "out of the closet" addict, I am working on this. And the first thing I did to stay sober - was - really tell myself over and over and over.... I will worry about tomorrow tomorrow. I cannot promise you that I won't use ever again. I may pick up tomorrow - I will make that decision tomorrow. But today, I will not use. Sometimes, it is "before lunch I will not use". And when I really repeat that over and over in my head. And I really work on focusing on the next four hours. I can stay sober.

The amazing part of that is though, that not only am I sober - I am so relieved. There is so much to worry about and plan in the future. It wears a person right out. (in fact - it may drive them to drink).

When I really focus on staying sober for this day and this day only - the bonus is that I feel immense relief from all the other stuff in my life that I don't need to worry about either. Not only can I worry about using tomorrow. I will also worry about work tomorrow and not ruin my Sunday afternoon with my kids.

So. My point is - I know EXACTLY what you are feeling. Stop thinking so much. Don't worry about the rest of your life, the next party etc. Worry about today and how you are going to stay sober TODAY. And what are you going to do to enjoy TODAY? Tomorrow will take care of itself.

This is much easier written than done by the way. But really try it. The first thing I felt when I began this journey is such relief. When I let myself start worrying about the future again - I fell of the wagon. So I am back to concentrating on the next four hours right now.

Good luck!!

BTKelsey820

I totally hear you on the holidays. I had to face New Year's after having only 2 wks sober. That was VERY difficult, especially the midnight toast. I was happy that I was w/a couple of VERY supportive friends, one of which has 13 1/2 yrs in the program. Then just last month, I had to face my birthday and do it sober. This was also a new experience b/c it was also one of the wknds I did the majority of my partying.

I still have days that are hard, but I am at least thankful knowing that I can fully remember and that I knew what was going on when I went to bed that night. It's been much better than any evening I came home drunk. I just have to keep going to meetings and try my best to remember why I chose not to drink in the first place.

Good luck to you!

J