Aquiana

I need some strength in advance guys! As some of you know Abf has been very well behaved in the last month or so. I was hoping it was a running trend... today however he's MIA. Went to work and I haven't seen him since. He's several hours late coming home so far which is actually very odd for him. Usually he at least phones but today, nothing. He may not be doing anything rotten but then again, he may be. Please wish me luck! Since I'm pregnant I'm somewhat emotional at the best of times but it really will be a huge disappointment if he's out drinking this afternoon. I'm really hoping he good behaviour hasn't run it's course already. Trying not to worry ahead of time.... not doing a very good job. I really, really don't need any more stress at the moment. I'm hoping that serenity thing happens....I truly hope he isn't going into binge phase.

Anyway, everybody please cross your fingers I can control my temper if he has been. I haven't been so good at that lately.

ggnewme

I will keep all my fingers crossed for you, and your BF, and you as a couple - even in the hope of recovery, the merry-go-round can be terrible....

I don't know if you've said or not previously, but, is your bf trying to be sober w/o support? AA, Smart Recovery - some kind of support group or counseling?

Mine has been more or less going it alone, although he has finally found a sponsor he connects with, and is going to one AA meeting a week....

And you - are you going to Al-anon or seeking support from "live" people? This site is incredible, but I find the contact with flesh and blood support different and also great. No judgment either way, just curious...

cwohio

good luck aquiana!! (((()))))

Gracey

I am wishing you the best that he comes home soon and he arrives safely.

Take care of yourself and that baby, you deserve relaxtion and a peace of mind

gelfling

You're in my prayers. Try and stay calm.

((((((((((((((((Aq)))))))))))))))))))

Aquiana

Thanks everyone! I think your prayers helped! He was out drinking in the afternoon. Apparently some guys he works with had a "bet" that whomever was the last to get their work done had to buy beer. He came home a few hours later and said he only had a couple. He did at least seem like he only had a couple. He wasn't drunk. I was obviously not happy at all but I managed to stop myself from yelling. He even said that I didn't seem too upset about it this time, (that means he knows it bothers me and still does it, *eyes rolling*). I was able to tell him calmly that I certainly don't like it at all but I can't force him not to. I explained why I didn't like it. Abf has a very distinct pattern really. Funny how you don't have to be with someone very long to catch those things. He'll start with a couple one day. Next time he feels he did so well he can have a little more and so on. In the end he's still swearing that won't happen and he's convinced he'll prove it. Okay, that's a challenge, prove it then.

Again thanx guys. I definitely wanted to let him have it. I felt way better though just having a quiet talk. Fighting is way to strenous right now.

zoe

Am glad you are feeling better. The anxiety is horrible especially at such a time. Take care. Hugs
Zoe