This disease sucks—then it KILLS!
No expectations!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,732
This disease sucks—then it KILLS!
I had a good friend in treatment. He OD'd and died less than 2 months after the night we both picked up our 90 days.
When I got home, I met a guy in my Caduceus meeting (12-Step meeting for healthcare professionals) who reminded me of my friend. Now he has followed in my first friend's footsteps to the end. He died New Year's Eve.
I remember a few months ago being with him in the ER after a suicide attempt, how I thought he'd finally had enough. And then a few weeks later, visiting him on the medical floor because his kidneys were failing after another relapse.
I haven't cried. I think I knew after that last visit what was coming. He went to a treatment center months ago and we never heard from him again even though he was one of my husband's sponsee brothers.
It's just sad. Really sad. I can't cry so I thought I'd put a remembrance here.
Thanks for being here, SR family!
Love and hugs,
Eddie
When I got home, I met a guy in my Caduceus meeting (12-Step meeting for healthcare professionals) who reminded me of my friend. Now he has followed in my first friend's footsteps to the end. He died New Year's Eve.
I remember a few months ago being with him in the ER after a suicide attempt, how I thought he'd finally had enough. And then a few weeks later, visiting him on the medical floor because his kidneys were failing after another relapse.
I haven't cried. I think I knew after that last visit what was coming. He went to a treatment center months ago and we never heard from him again even though he was one of my husband's sponsee brothers.
It's just sad. Really sad. I can't cry so I thought I'd put a remembrance here.
Thanks for being here, SR family!
Love and hugs,
Eddie
Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Baltimore, MD
Posts: 94
I'm sorry, Eddie. My prayers are with you. I keep hearing bad things about the people I went to treatment with. No one has died that I know of but I just found out a couple days ago that one lady, who I was pretty close to, tried to committ suicide because she relapsed, etc. and is now back at the same treatment facility we were in a couple months ago. Very sad and scary.
Only by the Grace of God....
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Gratitude and Thanks
Posts: 83
Eddie,
Sorry for your losses. Cunning, Baffling, Powerful, Patient, and DEADLY.
You're in my prayers bro. Talk to your HP/God, Your friends, Your sponsor, AA/NA meetings, etc. You DON'T have to follow in your friends footsteps.
You have found relief and that relief comes from GOD/HP.
Peace
Sean M.
Sorry for your losses. Cunning, Baffling, Powerful, Patient, and DEADLY.
You're in my prayers bro. Talk to your HP/God, Your friends, Your sponsor, AA/NA meetings, etc. You DON'T have to follow in your friends footsteps.
You have found relief and that relief comes from GOD/HP.
Peace
Sean M.
No expectations!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,732
Originally Posted by Gr8ful1
You're in my prayers bro.
Thank you so much, Dan, Anna, Richard, gg, Trish, and Sean! I am very grateful and I am NOT letting this send me into the tailspin that my first friend's death did!
Love and hugs,
Eddie
Giving up control
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Beckley, WV
Posts: 97
My heart goes out those people and you Eddie. Thet say some of us have to die so others can live, sad reality I must say. It reminds me that this is not about drinking/using or not drinking/using, it's about living or dying!
No expectations!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,732
Originally Posted by eddie z.
That's sis, Sean. LOL.
~~~~~~~~~
It reminds me that this is not about drinking/using or not drinking/using, it's about living or dying!
Love and hugs,
Eddie
No expectations!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,732
Welcome to SR, Grimnar!!
And you're welcome, too!
And you're welcome, too!
Yes, it's very scary! I think a couple of years ago it could've been me. I took so many risks and I knew it but I just didn't care. I HAD to get high! Thank HP that's not the case today. Keep coming back, G!
Love and hugs,
eddie
Only by the Grace of God....
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Gratitude and Thanks
Posts: 83
Eddie ZZZ
sorry for the mis-call on the bro. just assumed by the name. (ass - u - ME) ha, ha.
once again sorry for your losses. Don't lose FAITH because FAITH DEMOLISHES FEAR!
Sean M.
sorry for the mis-call on the bro. just assumed by the name. (ass - u - ME) ha, ha.
once again sorry for your losses. Don't lose FAITH because FAITH DEMOLISHES FEAR!
Sean M.
No expectations!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,732
Sean,
No problem. Happens all the time. And again, thank you! I have faith this time. Probably because I've got a little more time in the program. I'm actually doing really well. Mostly I'm angry. At the disease. At my friend. But I'll probably take it to my home group tomorrow and I'll be OK!
Love and
s,
Eddie
No problem. Happens all the time. And again, thank you! I have faith this time. Probably because I've got a little more time in the program. I'm actually doing really well. Mostly I'm angry. At the disease. At my friend. But I'll probably take it to my home group tomorrow and I'll be OK!
Love and
s,Eddie
knucklehead
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: earth
Posts: 694
Eddie sorry for your losses. the realities of continuing to abuse drugs are in our faces. yet sometimes we make the wrong choices and jump on in. it is a vicous cycle. like you said it sucks and it kills. the choice is never going to go away it will always be an obstical on the sober trail. peace and love
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