When to confront
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Brampton, Ontario
Posts: 3
When to confront
For the last two years, I've been renting out rooms to men in recovery. As you may well guess, there's been some challenging moments.
One thing I struggle with is when to confront. I often suspect someone is using - but without proof, I don't feel comfortable to confront in case I'm wrong. I've been waking in the night this week to an odour that suggests that my tenant in the next room is using crack. But crack use is hard to prove unless one has physical evidence at hand.
Is it appropriate to betray their trust by letting myself into their locked rooms and doing searches? I'm not comfortable with that, although I admit I've done so in the past to confirm my suspicions before confronting.
What do you think?
March
One thing I struggle with is when to confront. I often suspect someone is using - but without proof, I don't feel comfortable to confront in case I'm wrong. I've been waking in the night this week to an odour that suggests that my tenant in the next room is using crack. But crack use is hard to prove unless one has physical evidence at hand.
Is it appropriate to betray their trust by letting myself into their locked rooms and doing searches? I'm not comfortable with that, although I admit I've done so in the past to confirm my suspicions before confronting.
What do you think?
March
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,460
Hi March,
If you're in the business of renting out rooms to men in recovery, it would be realistic to expect problems of the men drinking/using. Are you in a social service position where you are in charge of these men? If so, you should have some guidelines as to when to confront someone. If you are merely renting rooms to the men, it doesn't seem to me that you should be confronting them at all. As I said, it seems that it would be expected by you that some of the men would relapse. Do you have something in writing, as a landlord, that states that the man may no longer remain in the room if he is drinking/using? If you do, then I guess you have a problem establishing whether in fact they are using. As far as entering their rooms, I live in Canada as well, and I know that doing that is completely and totally illegal.
Anna
If you're in the business of renting out rooms to men in recovery, it would be realistic to expect problems of the men drinking/using. Are you in a social service position where you are in charge of these men? If so, you should have some guidelines as to when to confront someone. If you are merely renting rooms to the men, it doesn't seem to me that you should be confronting them at all. As I said, it seems that it would be expected by you that some of the men would relapse. Do you have something in writing, as a landlord, that states that the man may no longer remain in the room if he is drinking/using? If you do, then I guess you have a problem establishing whether in fact they are using. As far as entering their rooms, I live in Canada as well, and I know that doing that is completely and totally illegal.
Anna
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: El Paso, Tx
Posts: 5,862
My question to you would be are they under a contract or lease? Is it your private and personally owned domain? I don't think doing searches is ethical but I don't think it's necessary to warrant the removal of a tenant. If you have suspicions and evidence of odors your probably justified in what you suspect. However, I don't think you should have to confront them either. Most places that provide tenancy under contract or lease give either party the right to move or request the move upon termination of the lease without reason. If they are there without a contract or lease, you have every right to implement a 30 day notice to evict in most states, again without reason. However, if it's going on in your private residence, you can enforce an immediate eviction by going through the proper channels.
I'm sure that there are plenty of men who are willing to take their commitment to sobriety seriously that would greatly appreciate a room in a sober living home. Additionally, you would want to consider the other tenants sobriety as well in making your decision.
I'm sure that there are plenty of men who are willing to take their commitment to sobriety seriously that would greatly appreciate a room in a sober living home. Additionally, you would want to consider the other tenants sobriety as well in making your decision.
Guest
Posts: n/a
Hi March:
I worked in a woman's shelter for about 12 years. It was a social service agency and a lot of the women were using. We were once legislated as 'a long term care home'. The government then legislated it under the 'landlord and tenant act', namely the Resident's Rights Act.
We could no longer enter their rooms. They were to be treated just as tenants who were renting an apartment. All rights and responsibilities were to be followed according to the Ontario Rentals Tribunal.
One thing we were taught in our studies though...was never, ever confront them while they were using. It could pose a risk to our staff.
I don't know what your situation is. If you're renting rooms privately...but I'd really think about this one on all fronts. And get as much legal information as possible. There's a real good course that the community colleges offer. It's called "non-violent crisis intervention."
Hope I've helped in just a small way...good luck to you
I've been there and it's so hard.
Shammy
I worked in a woman's shelter for about 12 years. It was a social service agency and a lot of the women were using. We were once legislated as 'a long term care home'. The government then legislated it under the 'landlord and tenant act', namely the Resident's Rights Act.
We could no longer enter their rooms. They were to be treated just as tenants who were renting an apartment. All rights and responsibilities were to be followed according to the Ontario Rentals Tribunal.
One thing we were taught in our studies though...was never, ever confront them while they were using. It could pose a risk to our staff.
I don't know what your situation is. If you're renting rooms privately...but I'd really think about this one on all fronts. And get as much legal information as possible. There's a real good course that the community colleges offer. It's called "non-violent crisis intervention."
Hope I've helped in just a small way...good luck to you
I've been there and it's so hard.
Shammy
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