LovelyKaya33333

How betrayed I feel is sinking in. I did good in shock mode. I feel almost numb right now and it is scary. I am just staring at walls. I had plans for today but I cancelled them. It is like I am comfortably numb. I am also having a horrible period ( sorry tmi for the guys on here) but it is so painful there aren't words for it and I have ruined my bedding and 4 pairs of jammie bottoms in a 2 day period....( I got checked for ovarian cancer 3 months ago and thank god it is negative) but my ex husband also lost his job 3 months ago and so health insurance is no longer with me... I will have more tests run from endermetriosis when I have insurance kick back in..... needless to say I am about to take a pain medicine from the dr. I just feel like sleeping all day. I think I just might do that. I made it to 75% of my obligations this week which I am proud of. All my laundry is done...I washed all my bedding...cleaned all remence of him out of my home. Filed for divorce and still made it to the gym once and work this week and it has been 6 days since he packed his **** in one hour and left with no notice and no emotions .... hell he didn't even give me any rent money and I was still fine... I went into my savings to pay all the bills on the first because he couldn't even leave me rent... ******* *******... anyhow is it ok to check out? Even if is just for the weekend? Ignore everything and everyone? I don't think I want to emerge into the world until Monday....

dandylion

Kayla/.....of course it is o.k. You are going to feel a kaleidoscope of emotions as you process and grieve all this.
I do have one bit of warning for you...related to the bleeding. Don't just assume that if you are tired or feel light headed, that is automatically related to your emotions.
It is quite easy to slip into anemia in this kind of situation. I have seen that a lot--lot--of times. If you do feel that way---I think it would be a good idea to give your doctor a call--insurance or not.

LovelyKaya33333

Thank you... The only symptom I don't have from all the pain is lack of hunger. I have been eating pretty regularly ... Had split pea soup this morning and some chips made out of califlower for example. Could I still have anemia if I am eating enough?

dandylion

kaya...absolutely! You can lose quite a bit of iron with that kind of bleeding.
If you are interested...please let me know by PM (private message). look to the top right hand corner of the forum page.

Cookie314

Yes you definitely can still have anemia, particularly if you are bleeding so heavily. You'll want to increase the iron, calcium, vitamin b, and vitamin c for a bit of you're like me. So increase meats, dairy, nuts, leafy greens, and fruit for a week or so.

As for your commitments, it sounds like you've gotten tons done, despite everything going on. Don't be so hard on yourself. If you need time alone, that is totally OK. While it helps to talk to your support network, and we definitely encourage it, taking some time alone to breathe and gather your thoughts is also important. You're dealing with some crazy stuff right now, and there's no shame in taking the time to process it.

trailmix

Yes, I think taking the time out is a great idea if that is what you would like to do.

I have a suggestion here, just accept the numb feeling, embrace it, thank it! I too have felt this way, almost that feeling where you are a bit separate from the world? You don't feel too bad nor good, happy nor sad, maybe a little sadness.

That's ok, you are probably overwhelmed, the body knows this and it has it's own management system. I've felt that way a few times when overwhelmed or hurt and I used to find it scary too, then one time I thought, you know, this is not actually bad. I think the scary part was - wait a minute, is this normal, will I ever feel normal again! But you will and if it goes on too long you can always go see someone about it, but right now I wouldn't be at all concerned about that.