Brother is dying of cirrhosis @ hospice house
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2021
Location: Washington, D.C.
Posts: 2
Brother is dying of cirrhosis @ hospice house
Hello all!! Newbie here to SR but not a newbie to the disease of alcoholism. Both my father, my paternal grandparents and my brother have struggled with this disease.
In the early hours of the morning as I write this, my brother is dying from cirrhosis in a hospice facility. He is 44 and has a 4 year old daughter who also lost her mother to addiction two years ago.
For 34 days I have visited my brother daily at hospice, watching him deteriorate into a shell of a person. He has battled alcoholism for several years but the last two years have been marred by inpatient stays at the hospital and multiple ER visits. Always the same diagnosis - liver issues, pancreas inflammation, low potassium & magnesium and malnutrition. Stop drinking it you’re going to kill yourself the drs would say. Take this pill to help you in your sobriety (medication that makes you sick when you drink) yet he never got the prescription filled. He never wanted to stop drinking and we are now waiting on the call he’s imminent. All I have been able to do for him is be there with everyday and watch him die of this horrible disease. We tried for many years to get him to quit but as you all know, no one will stop until they are ready. He never hit rock bottom as my mother made sure he was taken care of and my niece was with her most of the time to shield her from the damage her father was doing to himself.
Alcoholism doesn’t discriminate and affects so many. Much love to you all; looking forward to finding support during these tough times.
In the early hours of the morning as I write this, my brother is dying from cirrhosis in a hospice facility. He is 44 and has a 4 year old daughter who also lost her mother to addiction two years ago.
For 34 days I have visited my brother daily at hospice, watching him deteriorate into a shell of a person. He has battled alcoholism for several years but the last two years have been marred by inpatient stays at the hospital and multiple ER visits. Always the same diagnosis - liver issues, pancreas inflammation, low potassium & magnesium and malnutrition. Stop drinking it you’re going to kill yourself the drs would say. Take this pill to help you in your sobriety (medication that makes you sick when you drink) yet he never got the prescription filled. He never wanted to stop drinking and we are now waiting on the call he’s imminent. All I have been able to do for him is be there with everyday and watch him die of this horrible disease. We tried for many years to get him to quit but as you all know, no one will stop until they are ready. He never hit rock bottom as my mother made sure he was taken care of and my niece was with her most of the time to shield her from the damage her father was doing to himself.
Alcoholism doesn’t discriminate and affects so many. Much love to you all; looking forward to finding support during these tough times.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I too want to send my hugs of support and am so sorry for what you and he and all who love him are going through. Special prayers for his little girl.
I am glad you found us and hope you know you are among people who understand and care, here.
Welcome to SR.
I am glad you found us and hope you know you are among people who understand and care, here.
Welcome to SR.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Santa Rosa CA
Posts: 240
Oh Hawkeye, so sorry you are having to watch your brother slowly fade away.
I lost one of my brothers to alcoholism about 16 months ago.
So many emergency room visits, so many hospital stays. He would get out of the hospital and go straight back to the booze. He didn't want to quit.
You will be glad in the days ahead that you have been there for him, I did the same with my brother. I have always been so glad that I was able to support and love him through the end of his life.
I think of him daily and miss him so much.
Blessings to you!
I lost one of my brothers to alcoholism about 16 months ago.
So many emergency room visits, so many hospital stays. He would get out of the hospital and go straight back to the booze. He didn't want to quit.
You will be glad in the days ahead that you have been there for him, I did the same with my brother. I have always been so glad that I was able to support and love him through the end of his life.
I think of him daily and miss him so much.
Blessings to you!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 2,576
I'm sorry Hawkeye2k, but I admire you for being such a good sister. Many die alone because loved ones often bail before things get so dire. I'm sure you know he never meant to hurt you or his daughter by going out this way. It is so hard to stop drinking and impossible for others. Sending you peace.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2021
Location: Washington, D.C.
Posts: 2
It truly is a terrible disease! I am glad to be here. This is a road I would not want anyone to have to travel in life but it’s one I must take unfortunately. I feel the trauma of his slow starvation hitting me everyday. Six weeks without any food or drink I’m so shocked he can survive this long but I know he has a young and healthy heart.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 8,984
Ah Hawkeye, what a difficult vigil. Not something anyone wants to do.
I hope you are doing what you can to take care of yourself even if it is just short walks and staying hydrated.
Alcoholism is too often fatal. It seems like once or twice a month on this forum someone reports a death. No matter how expected it is still a shock and the nature of the death perhaps changes the grief a bit.
Peace to you and your family.
I hope you are doing what you can to take care of yourself even if it is just short walks and staying hydrated.
Alcoholism is too often fatal. It seems like once or twice a month on this forum someone reports a death. No matter how expected it is still a shock and the nature of the death perhaps changes the grief a bit.
Peace to you and your family.
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