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BREAKING NEWS...YUH-WUH CLOWN ALERT!
This just in...
We here at CNN ( that's the Cable Clown Network ) have received several reports that one of our dearest and most beloved "recov-o-pals" may be in trapped and lost in the loathsome grip of one of the most insidious substances yet to hit the streets.
A search was conducted by certain severely over-enthusiastic members of the National Security Adminstration at the vacation bungalow belonging to "smoke'em if ya got'em", the prominent civic leader and revered public speaker. In a old US Navy footlocker that was cleverly buried beneath a mountain of self-help pamphlets and those really cutesy kind of stuffed animals, authorities were shocked to discover these...
Police departments of nearly every major city report startling increases of Party Cracking cases.
F. Bertram Dewey, of the dubious and offensive legal firm of Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe, made this statement on behalf of Ms Smoke, "My client categorigally denies any wrong-doing regarding these outrageous charges. We believe that we are being framed, and several co-workers at KrazyBob Inc. are being sought for questioning. That's all I can say until she pays my retainer." Ms. Smoke could not be reached for comment.
Film at eleven. We now return you to "When Clowns Attack", already in progress.
We here at CNN ( that's the Cable Clown Network ) have received several reports that one of our dearest and most beloved "recov-o-pals" may be in trapped and lost in the loathsome grip of one of the most insidious substances yet to hit the streets.
A search was conducted by certain severely over-enthusiastic members of the National Security Adminstration at the vacation bungalow belonging to "smoke'em if ya got'em", the prominent civic leader and revered public speaker. In a old US Navy footlocker that was cleverly buried beneath a mountain of self-help pamphlets and those really cutesy kind of stuffed animals, authorities were shocked to discover these...
Police departments of nearly every major city report startling increases of Party Cracking cases.
F. Bertram Dewey, of the dubious and offensive legal firm of Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe, made this statement on behalf of Ms Smoke, "My client categorigally denies any wrong-doing regarding these outrageous charges. We believe that we are being framed, and several co-workers at KrazyBob Inc. are being sought for questioning. That's all I can say until she pays my retainer." Ms. Smoke could not be reached for comment.
Film at eleven. We now return you to "When Clowns Attack", already in progress.
It's a LIE! I was keeping those self-help pamhlets for a friend. Those weren't my crackers. Nope. Sure, I've tried 'em. All the kids are doing it. But it wasn't my fault. Someone was having a birthday... I was DRIVEN to party crackers. Anyway, party crackers... what's the big deal. I could be doing something really heavy like cherry bombs or bottle rockets. You know the old rhyme... God is good, men are slackers, men made smoke bombs, God made party crackers. (At least, I think that's how it goes.)
Damn those paparazzi! Hey Gang, help me out. If approached by a clown with a microphone, only give your user name and member number. They may try to threaten you. Water pistols, blasting bicycle horns, squeaky balloon animals, runaway clown cars... there's no end to their insidious carnivalistic furor. Whatever you do, don't tell 'em about the stuffed duck!
Damn those paparazzi! Hey Gang, help me out. If approached by a clown with a microphone, only give your user name and member number. They may try to threaten you. Water pistols, blasting bicycle horns, squeaky balloon animals, runaway clown cars... there's no end to their insidious carnivalistic furor. Whatever you do, don't tell 'em about the stuffed duck!
CNN UPDATE: SMOKING OR NONSMOKING?
We interrupt the last moments of our regularly scheduled program,
"Steroids Ain't Funny - The Chuckles Nagurski Story", to bring you up to date on the stunning events unfolding around the KrazyBob empire.
FBI and local law enforcement agencies have announced that the focus of this investigation, "Stuff gets in my teeth", was seen driving a white Pinto by officers, who pursued her with no less than 54 city vehicles, who were later joined by a group of Shriners who were parading nearby.
We are attempting to bring you footage of the chase from a newscopter operated by our ClownNews affiliate, WNUT, in Hammelburg NJ, but it seems they sent a tape of "Its A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" by mistake.
We will pass on any new developments, lurid rumors, baseless public opinions and downright speculation just as soon as we scare them up.
We now join tonights BigTop Movie -
"The Clowns Meet The Cannibals, or, Does This Taste Funny To You?",
after these messages from the Citizens Comittee For Party Cracker Research.
"Steroids Ain't Funny - The Chuckles Nagurski Story", to bring you up to date on the stunning events unfolding around the KrazyBob empire.
FBI and local law enforcement agencies have announced that the focus of this investigation, "Stuff gets in my teeth", was seen driving a white Pinto by officers, who pursued her with no less than 54 city vehicles, who were later joined by a group of Shriners who were parading nearby.
We are attempting to bring you footage of the chase from a newscopter operated by our ClownNews affiliate, WNUT, in Hammelburg NJ, but it seems they sent a tape of "Its A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" by mistake.
We will pass on any new developments, lurid rumors, baseless public opinions and downright speculation just as soon as we scare them up.
We now join tonights BigTop Movie -
"The Clowns Meet The Cannibals, or, Does This Taste Funny To You?",
after these messages from the Citizens Comittee For Party Cracker Research.
ROFLMAO:shades2:
I post and go away for a few hours and look what happens....the clown invade!!!
Krazee.....I stopped feeding the duck, I wish the others would follow suit!!!
If i can ever figure out how to get a pic in here ( I know it's something simple and my mind is going to fast to catch it ) I might be able to show you a pic of what it does when you feed the ducks!
I post and go away for a few hours and look what happens....the clown invade!!!
Krazee.....I stopped feeding the duck, I wish the others would follow suit!!!
If i can ever figure out how to get a pic in here ( I know it's something simple and my mind is going to fast to catch it ) I might be able to show you a pic of what it does when you feed the ducks!
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