Girlfriend is a alcoholic!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2020
Posts: 2
Girlfriend is a alcoholic!!
Hello everyone I’m new here, I been dating my girlfriend for over 2 years.we knew each other since we were kids While dating her I knew she liked to drink but hid it well, drink until she passed out , she had lived with her parents who are also recovering alcolics so no booze allowed in her house, I was a occasional drinker she made me dislike it so much I don’t drink anymore don’t want to be a enabler, her parents kicked her out a few months ago because of her drinking she also has a 13 year old daughter, which confides in me she’s been through too much I have 4 girls of my own , I got divorced a few years ago went through hell came out of it .. now there is her I let her move in, overall she’s fantastic when she doesn’t drink but when she does wow she verbally and physically abusive which she apologizes the next day. She hides alcohol in my house I find it pour it out. I have my kids every other weekend she’s good she doesn’t drink when they are over. But sometimes I come home to a different person she’s great to me when she doesn’t drink but when she does she is mean to me and her daughter, which I grew close with her having girls of my own , I should of known from the beginning what I got myself into. Just finishing off my divorce . I’m stuck I care for her she tells me I’m her world she started AA 1 month ago twice a week that or she’s out. When she doesn’t drink she’s angry.. just stuck and stressed I still stuck around after all her outburst but feel like she won’t change just venting thank you
Member
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 291
Hi DofG
My son is my addict, so I have no experience to share of an addicted partner.
A month is a very short time, and she will not have scratched the surface dealing with her alcohol consumption. Emotions, feelings, coping strategies, that were previously blunted by alcohol will be surfacing, and she won't know how to deal with it.
The question for you to ask yourself, is, are you willing to put your life on hold and wait and see how things pan out? Only you can answer that. It would seem she's had a problem for some time, and that won't sort itself quickly. Unfortunately, there is no guarantees that she will remain sober either.
You have to decide what is best for you and your girls. My granny used to say " forever is a long time to be miserable". You don't have to "stay stuck"
Much Love
Bute x
My son is my addict, so I have no experience to share of an addicted partner.
A month is a very short time, and she will not have scratched the surface dealing with her alcohol consumption. Emotions, feelings, coping strategies, that were previously blunted by alcohol will be surfacing, and she won't know how to deal with it.
The question for you to ask yourself, is, are you willing to put your life on hold and wait and see how things pan out? Only you can answer that. It would seem she's had a problem for some time, and that won't sort itself quickly. Unfortunately, there is no guarantees that she will remain sober either.
You have to decide what is best for you and your girls. My granny used to say " forever is a long time to be miserable". You don't have to "stay stuck"
Much Love
Bute x
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 583
D O G
Well, I've been down that road being married.
RUN! I'd help her get a place of her own.
Maybe not sign anything, for it but PAY for her rent for a few months to get her out. For the safety of yourself and your girls PLEASE PLEASE put your kids first.
AG
Well, I've been down that road being married.
RUN! I'd help her get a place of her own.
Maybe not sign anything, for it but PAY for her rent for a few months to get her out. For the safety of yourself and your girls PLEASE PLEASE put your kids first.
AG
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 8,629
Hi Dadofgirlz, sorry for what brings you here but glad you found SR.
You didn't Cause it, can't Control it and can't Cure it (the 3 c's).
There really is no use pouring the alcohol out, you are just wasting money because, of course, she can always get more. You really can't control this. She will get sober when she is ready to and not a moment before.
I hope you will learn all you can about alcoholism (for yourself, not for her).
I know you know that abuse, whether physical or mental is never ok. Perhaps it's time for her to move elsewhere?
The is a forum here for friends and family of alcoholics, you may want to post there as well and also read the threads, I'm sure there are many there you can relate to.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ly-alcoholics/
You didn't Cause it, can't Control it and can't Cure it (the 3 c's).
There really is no use pouring the alcohol out, you are just wasting money because, of course, she can always get more. You really can't control this. She will get sober when she is ready to and not a moment before.
I hope you will learn all you can about alcoholism (for yourself, not for her).
I know you know that abuse, whether physical or mental is never ok. Perhaps it's time for her to move elsewhere?
The is a forum here for friends and family of alcoholics, you may want to post there as well and also read the threads, I'm sure there are many there you can relate to.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ly-alcoholics/
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
