doneghm

Hi all,
I've been struggling for a bit, knowing that I'm not doing myself any favors when it comes to sobriety. I managed a 2 month stretch recently, but what I call the addict brain got a hold of me and the lies it tells me kicked me to the curb. I feel more and more worthless as I continue to make the decisions I know I shouldn't. Do you have any advice on standing up to yourself?
Thanks and best to all of you

Anna

Welcome and I'm glad you found us.

Two months of sobriety is great, but it seems that it's at a time like that when the AV really kicks in. It comes on stronger, because it knows it's losing and you're winning. When you recognize the voice for what it is, you can learn to dismiss it and carry on staying the course. You're worth the hard work.

pattyspaw

Doneghn I have the same problem "standing up to myself". I can talk myself in and out stuff with amazing conviction for which ever side I want to win at that given moment. I am new with today being day 8 of being sober. I keep hearing it gets easier; I hope so for both our sakes.

RecklessDrunk

Think the drink through. Play the tape forward.
What's really going to happen if I drink tonight? Just tonight for now, not OMG I'm never going to drink again. Is it going to be a good idea to drink tonight. Honestly, what is tomorrow going to look like. How miserable will I feel, how good will I feel if I don't drink.

One day at a time and if the morning went crappy then just start the day over in the afternoon. OK the first part of the day didnt go well so just take the rest of the day at a time.

Repeat the serenity prayer and think how it applies to the moment..

A higher power or, gasp, God. If your not spiritual maybe consider just how the universe and you and all of us got here. Ultimately something bigger then us or alcohol is in control. Try to flow with it. Trust in something else besides alcohol.

least

I had to want to be sober more than I wanted to drink. Once I got to that point, nothing could stop me.

It also helps strengthen sobriety by being grateful. The simple act of being grateful, expressing gratitude, can change your whole perspective for the better. Give it a try.

Rsanchez920

And I'm no expert here... I have had several decent stretches I'm currently at 33 days and my addict voice as they call it has always derailed me pretty early on 2 weeks or so into each Journey I've had.... and I haven't been able to say no to it. I personally think that having facts and reasoning and really wanting sobriety over relying on the initial emotional /desperation like how we often do after having yet again another crappy experience or just being sick and tired of being sick and tired has helped me this time around so far.... I just keep reminding myself that Society really puts alcohol on this pedestal and makes it seem like it's this good time juice and it is just poison and it is just so normalized and we get the same result every time we use it and I just repeat that to myself.... I read recovery stories every day so I don't start glamorizing when I used to drink and that's really been helping me a lot. I've been reading what alcohol does to the body and about how addiction works etc... I am a very heady and over analytical person so this type of thing really helps me a lot once my initial couple days of desperation wears off...

Dee74

Hi Doneghm

I think support really helps

coming here every day and reading well as posting made it more difficult for me to make that inner choice to start drinking.

I hope you’ll find being here helpful too - welcome aboard!

D

Steely

I've reached the point where I want to be sober more than I want to drink. Every single experience, experiment, has failed me, and I've gotten to know that it always would. The consequences. The losses. Both incalculable.

Playing the tape forward as RecklessDrunk suggests is what I used to do, and still do I suppose, and it works, not always I know, but at least it has us think about what our last drink was like and how it really didn't deliver as expected. I've never taken a drink during my 'alcoholism' that has delivered anything outside of despair and regret. Gone are the days of wine and roses. Only the thorns remain. I'm so glad that I know this now.

You have not 'failed' so long as you are trying. Keep trying, and think of that last drink. Keep playing the tape forward and know you're doing the right thing for yourself at last. And you will be.

LumenandNyx

Hi,

I think the members before me here have some great ideas. I've tried them. What eventually worked for me was - I just stopped drinking. I acknowledged that "Yo - I don't drink alcohol anymore." I don't kill spiders, I don't streak naked at football games, I don't eat French onion soup, and I don't drink alcohol. And there's no discussion about any of those things.
I quit overthinking it and I quit trying to stop. I just did it. Period. Drinking became a non-option. I don't drink for anything, for any reason, for anyone - anymore.

MaximusD

Hi Doneghm, I used to just go for a walk and talk to myself about what was happening. Even though I would feel a bit down I would just tell myself that there is no point to get down on my self as it doesnt help anything. Keep trying! Most of us have tried and failed many times before it stuck but you are still building up tons of sober time!

ImNotThatGuy

I'm in the same boat presently. In the past, what has worked is telling myself over and over and over that I do not drink. It's just not an option, not something I do. I've got so little time that I don't want to jinx it by giving you any advice, but all I can say is keep trying. Sooner or later you'll get it right.
Best of luck.