Hi back after multiple relapses
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Out in the Stix of Southern Indiana
Posts: 2,784
I had to focus on me. The most important thing in my life is my sobriety cause I don't have a life without it. Don't expect too much from you for a few days, just don't drink. Drink plenty of water. Take naps. Whatever it takes! Best wishes.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2020
Posts: 25
I’m into day three now. Figuring out my plan and path as well. This is definitely not my first rodeo. Been trying to control/moderate/get sober/ play with fire for almost two decades. After pretty much being sober almost the entire last year I’m back to square one. Feeling deflated. But we can do this. I really don’t have a choice anymore. It’s getting worse and worse. You’re not alone in your feelings. I know days will get better as they go by but it’s always hard to look forward or be patient for the reward. I’m such an instant gratification person that moving through the motions in the first month is hard. Glad you shared.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: France
Posts: 3,040
Thanks that’s what I’ve been doing, and now I’ve got too concentrate on me and my sobriety, because I can’t do this anymore it’s pushing my depression to a place where I don’t want to go
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
I'm sorry for what you've been through, mummy - but so glad you came back to us.
I had this happen a couple of times & for me it sort of needed to. I had to have further convincing - even though I knew in my heart I could never control my drinking.
You can get free again & never go back.
I had this happen a couple of times & for me it sort of needed to. I had to have further convincing - even though I knew in my heart I could never control my drinking.
You can get free again & never go back.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 1,468
Welcome back!
I had to want to be sober more than I wanted to drink. I will have 3 years next month of consistently wanting to be sober more than I want a drink.
I knew for a long time that I had a problem. My son is my saving grace. He was not going to be raised as I was surrounded by booze, sex, drugs, lack of parenting, lack of connection, and having to figure out life for himself. I wanted better for him and dang it, I deserved to be the best mom I am able to be for my self and my son.
I struggle because I am human, just not with alcohol, being hungover, living with regret from the night before, not living in fear that I drank too much with my kid home, etc...
You'll know when you are ready, I hope for you and your kids that day is today.
Be well,
DC
I had to want to be sober more than I wanted to drink. I will have 3 years next month of consistently wanting to be sober more than I want a drink.
I knew for a long time that I had a problem. My son is my saving grace. He was not going to be raised as I was surrounded by booze, sex, drugs, lack of parenting, lack of connection, and having to figure out life for himself. I wanted better for him and dang it, I deserved to be the best mom I am able to be for my self and my son.
I struggle because I am human, just not with alcohol, being hungover, living with regret from the night before, not living in fear that I drank too much with my kid home, etc...
You'll know when you are ready, I hope for you and your kids that day is today.
Be well,
DC
Do you have a plan to stay sober?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,414
Originally Posted by lessgravity 
Nothing changes if nothing changes Mum. Good to see you back.
I hope this time you will seriously revise and improve your sobriety plan, and get some outside support.
I really admire that you don't give up and you keep trying--that says a whole lot about your character--but it is time to try smarter and harder. You can do it!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,414
Post your plan here and we can help you if you like. If not, make yourself accountable in some meaningful way or it doesn't happen.
Being sick of it is one thing, but having specific, planned, concrete steps to take and an action plan to avoid / deal with temptation is a whole other animal. You also should very much consider counseling and outside support, since going it alone isn't working.
One suggestion I have is to look back at your last 5-10 relapses and figure out what happened to trigger you--where were you, who were you with, what was said, what were you thinking, what time was it, etc.
That honest analysis can help you pinpoint danger times / places / feelings so you can promptly remove yourself from them or employ another coping strategy.
It really does take this kind of detail, focus, and commitment for many of us to quit successfully. Good intentions won't do it alone.
Being sick of it is one thing, but having specific, planned, concrete steps to take and an action plan to avoid / deal with temptation is a whole other animal. You also should very much consider counseling and outside support, since going it alone isn't working.
One suggestion I have is to look back at your last 5-10 relapses and figure out what happened to trigger you--where were you, who were you with, what was said, what were you thinking, what time was it, etc.
That honest analysis can help you pinpoint danger times / places / feelings so you can promptly remove yourself from them or employ another coping strategy.
It really does take this kind of detail, focus, and commitment for many of us to quit successfully. Good intentions won't do it alone.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2020
Location: I'm sitting right here ...
Posts: 918
Originally Posted by Mummyto2
On day 2 trying to figure everything out, what I can do to change my thought pattern and lifestyle
You don't have to figure everything out and change your thought pattern/lifestyle. That's way overboard.
Just stop drinking. That's all you have to do and that's all you have to figure out. All that other stuff will sort itself out once you get and stay sober. Go figure.
Every time you want to go after your drink of choice - drink something else.
Or do something else.
I know how hard it is - but it's also really simple. Just don't swallow alcohol. For any reason.
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