My alcoholic has died. She was only 28
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 15
My alcoholic has died. She was only 28
Heavy in the grieving process at the moment. My ex GF who I've known for 3 years died suddenly from a heart arrhythmia two weeks ago, brought on by alcoholism and bulimia. We broke up 8 months ago due to her refusal to do anything about her drinking problem but we stayed in touch. Today would have been her 29th birthday.
I took her to the ER three times last year, the 3rd time she was admitted for a week with alcoholic hepatitis. She refused any sort of help. It was not the wake up call it should have been. When we broke up I told her she should go home to her family, but instead she moved in with an alcoholic abusive ex BF and drank herself into oblivion. I told her when she left that she was headed for disaster, but she didn't listen to me or her family.
Last month she finally moved to her family and seemed to maybe have turned a corner. But it was just too late. Her mom told me after I learned of her death that she was so thin and frail and that her body was just worn out.
I'm almost 40 years old, this is the only woman I have ever wanted to start a family with. I was really rooting for her to live a very long and happy life, even if it couldn't be with me. Instead, she's dead and buried. At 28. Damn it
I took her to the ER three times last year, the 3rd time she was admitted for a week with alcoholic hepatitis. She refused any sort of help. It was not the wake up call it should have been. When we broke up I told her she should go home to her family, but instead she moved in with an alcoholic abusive ex BF and drank herself into oblivion. I told her when she left that she was headed for disaster, but she didn't listen to me or her family.
Last month she finally moved to her family and seemed to maybe have turned a corner. But it was just too late. Her mom told me after I learned of her death that she was so thin and frail and that her body was just worn out.
I'm almost 40 years old, this is the only woman I have ever wanted to start a family with. I was really rooting for her to live a very long and happy life, even if it couldn't be with me. Instead, she's dead and buried. At 28. Damn it
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,507
Z71Ross - I'm so sorry for the pain you are feeling over this tragic turn of events. You did all that you could possibly do to lead her to help. You stayed in touch and continued to be there for her, even after your relationship was doomed by her behavior. Not many would have been willing to do that. You sound like a compassionate and empathetic person. I'll pray for you & her family to be comforted.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 8,969
Ah Z, I am so very sorry. Even when you can see it coming, it is still a horrific shock.
Please do everything you can to take care of yourself. This is a hug blow that will take awhile to process.
May all the angels of the world dive bomb you and her family.
Please do everything you can to take care of yourself. This is a hug blow that will take awhile to process.
May all the angels of the world dive bomb you and her family.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 356
I’m so sorry for your loss. It is hard to stand by and watch people destroy themselves. I have a couple of patients currently that are young and with serious alcohol related medical issues that likely won’t be around for much longer. They say they want to quit but they just keep drinking. For non addicts it is hard to understand that serious medical problems (or really any problems, financial medical etc) still aren’t enough to get sober. Rock bottom is different for everyone unfortunately. I can tell you from a provider stand point it is also very hard because you can’t do anything to help them unless they are willing to help themselves. It is very sad to see anyone lose their battle with addiction but at such a young age I think it is even harder I think.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Florida
Posts: 115
I'm so sorry. I lost my estranged AH to complications of alcohol on May 1. It's heartbreaking to care and be so helpless watching the slow deterioration of their body. I bet he weighed less than 110 when he passed at 54. Now that they have found peace, I'm hoping for ours.
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