Vino88

I've never really cared about people's opinions. Society always accepted me, heck, many of my friends even took my words, my behaviour etc.

But since this sickness progressed into the real alcoholic insanity … I have a feeling that others somehow sense, feel, smell … that something isn't right. I've been ignored by people on a daily basis – by my »friends«, aquaintances, potential bosses and girlfriends. I think that my insecurity, inability to hadle alcohol (and therefore life) somehow projects itself through my words, actions etc. Even »friends« who may not possess the academic status I have, or maybe do not live by the modern society's standards, somehow refuse to be in my company.

Maybe this rotten, dark and morbid feeling that I deeply feel about me somehow projects into everything that I do. Don't know if this is maybe some »narcissistic« trait, an agenda that I possess subconsciously… I feel like it's in my eyes, my walk, the way I carry myself … The insecure, childlish, sneaky, anxoius, non-accountable behaviour …

I hope I've been clear enough. :/

(Sorry, English is not my native language and I do my best to put my thoughts into it.)

All the best!

doggonecarl

I doubt they need to smell it, they can probably see it plain as day. The real insanity of alcoholism is how long it takes for us to see it.

MaximusD

Yeah, I was just questioning this myself and yes many times they do probably see it. Or, it could be how you are acting because of it and they don't know it is alcohol but they don't like your behavior?

Hevyn

Hi Vino
I remember wondering why people were shying away from me - I was sure I was fooling everyone & acting just fine. I didn't realize until I quit how it changed my personality & attitude. Eye drops, mouthwash, & perfume can only help so much.

Anna

Denial is a huge part of alcoholism which is why we can carry on so long.

But, for others in our lives, I'm sure they see changes that are happening.

Dee74

Hi Vino

Like others have said I'm sure people could see it, let alone smell it.
The good news is you can rehabilitate your reputation.

I stopped poisoning my mind and body and I rebuilt my life.

You can too

D

brighterday1234

People who are sober and have a solid recovery ooze a calmness and sense of ease. Getting sober and getting recovered from alcoholism is a great way for people to see this in you.

The opposite is true for those in active addiction.