Still going....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2019
Location: Chicago
Posts: 252
Still going....
It's been over a week...this time around im not going to be caught up in counting days because of my relapses i tend to have at milestones which was talked about here recently... Dont know if its celebratory or dopamine related but either way i just figured i would try something new...
Someone here mentioned that it might take longer this time around then 4 days to start feeling normal and oddly enough is true because I've woken up for the past two days feeling hungover with no energy at all and I have not been drinking or using anything also my anger and anxiety has been through the roof I feel horrible I've been shouting at my son and losing my temper constantly and saying things that I regret and if I have to go into a store or anything like that sometimes I have a panic attack and I have to leave the store just because of stress I'm assuming but it's strange because I only relapsed/used for one night no bender so you think I would be fine like three days later but nooope.... over a week later and here I am feeling like a mess... Mostly extreme anger and hostility but i think its because im currently manic....
On a good note I've been exercising everyday, taking ny online language classes, cooking, staying busy etc.
Ive had the urge twice so far but with no phone number to my dealer i just let it go... Not too much turmoil so that's good...
Well thats my update... I am still here!
Someone here mentioned that it might take longer this time around then 4 days to start feeling normal and oddly enough is true because I've woken up for the past two days feeling hungover with no energy at all and I have not been drinking or using anything also my anger and anxiety has been through the roof I feel horrible I've been shouting at my son and losing my temper constantly and saying things that I regret and if I have to go into a store or anything like that sometimes I have a panic attack and I have to leave the store just because of stress I'm assuming but it's strange because I only relapsed/used for one night no bender so you think I would be fine like three days later but nooope.... over a week later and here I am feeling like a mess... Mostly extreme anger and hostility but i think its because im currently manic....
On a good note I've been exercising everyday, taking ny online language classes, cooking, staying busy etc.
Ive had the urge twice so far but with no phone number to my dealer i just let it go... Not too much turmoil so that's good...
Well thats my update... I am still here!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
R.Sanchez...its so rough....these first 2 weeks...I have 10 days..today is the first day I wasn't a complete mess with the anger, frustration, hopelessness, exhaustion, fear.....today day 10 was good....
But I know exactly how you feel and don't give in to it....no matter what......keep fighting it....I'm glad I got thru yesterday...yesterday I felt like I was going to drink it came like a TIDLE wave out of nowhere.
Then I found some online AA meetings...and just listening calmed me...
Do whatever you can to stay sober.
But I know exactly how you feel and don't give in to it....no matter what......keep fighting it....I'm glad I got thru yesterday...yesterday I felt like I was going to drink it came like a TIDLE wave out of nowhere.
Then I found some online AA meetings...and just listening calmed me...
Do whatever you can to stay sober.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
When I was a few days sober i would binge watch tv, drink all sorts of calming/sleepy time teas, and exercise.
I still feel anxiety everyday especially around 3 to 5 pm. That was typically when I would be drinking, but since I had a funny work schedule etc. I started drinking more and more at all hours.
My wife works the mid shift so half the time she wouldn't see my end state or stumbling around and passing out. She was my biggest critic constantly calling me an alcoholic.
Since I quit, she doesn't seem to care much. She is a feisty free spirit and always manages to find happiness every day doing her thing.
Suffering and education were my way out. I suffer a little bit still everyday. I call it growing up. I had to put on my big boy pants and handle my issue.
I always remenber it is science. There is no mystery. It is all chemicals in my body and brain. It takes years for them to normalize.
That is why so few make it out. It takes years.
Some call the normalization process the AV.
My av waits in the corner. It will never die and it remains strong. It lies and waits in the shadows of my emotions.
It strengthens when I am happy, sad, angry, tired, hungry etc.
It is linked to my emotions. My analysis defeats it. It is left brain vs right brain. Hence, feeling crazy.
Thanks.
I still feel anxiety everyday especially around 3 to 5 pm. That was typically when I would be drinking, but since I had a funny work schedule etc. I started drinking more and more at all hours.
My wife works the mid shift so half the time she wouldn't see my end state or stumbling around and passing out. She was my biggest critic constantly calling me an alcoholic.
Since I quit, she doesn't seem to care much. She is a feisty free spirit and always manages to find happiness every day doing her thing.
Suffering and education were my way out. I suffer a little bit still everyday. I call it growing up. I had to put on my big boy pants and handle my issue.
I always remenber it is science. There is no mystery. It is all chemicals in my body and brain. It takes years for them to normalize.
That is why so few make it out. It takes years.
Some call the normalization process the AV.
My av waits in the corner. It will never die and it remains strong. It lies and waits in the shadows of my emotions.
It strengthens when I am happy, sad, angry, tired, hungry etc.
It is linked to my emotions. My analysis defeats it. It is left brain vs right brain. Hence, feeling crazy.
Thanks.
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