Gonna vent here
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Gonna vent here
Right now I could easily slip back into the oblivion. The whole pandemic thing is starting to wear on me, as it is many of you I'm sure. Fitness is a huge part of my recovery and they just closed all fitness centers for the next month. Not happy.
Then I argue with my wife as she dictates my entire life like I'm a 4 year old and I have had it. Told her I was going to by a bicycle to exercise and she said "no, your not spending money, you can go downstairs and do sit ups and push up". I flipped.
Told her next time she goes to the store to buy diapers because I'm gonna start wearing them. Really close to calling the attorney. Ridiculous. Other than that life is great.
Then I argue with my wife as she dictates my entire life like I'm a 4 year old and I have had it. Told her I was going to by a bicycle to exercise and she said "no, your not spending money, you can go downstairs and do sit ups and push up". I flipped.
Told her next time she goes to the store to buy diapers because I'm gonna start wearing them. Really close to calling the attorney. Ridiculous. Other than that life is great.
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2018
Posts: 255
It is just stressful for people to be cooped up together for an extended period of time. Doesn't mean you want a divorce or hate each other. Take a walk around the block? Go to another room to take a time-out from each other. It'll pass. It's just very stressful but you have to stick together and put up with each other. Just go somewhere away from each other -take a time-out. Recognize her point of view too, you're probably getting on her nerves!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
I think its stressful now for everyone Jeff, your wife included it sounds like.
Its not unheard of for people, scared people, to try and control things when the world itself seems uncontrolled.
You may not like it, but I figure you also gave your wife a scare with your relapse.
It maybe she's still a bit traumatised over that.
Don't call your attorney. Sounds like you have a good partner there who's stuck with you through thick and thin.
If you're not sure you want to exercise outside, use whatever you have handy in the home for exercise. Make a game of it - use your imagination - what can I use today?.
All these things will pass, man - surf it out - and don't drink. That would be like throwing a match into gasoline.
D
Its not unheard of for people, scared people, to try and control things when the world itself seems uncontrolled.
You may not like it, but I figure you also gave your wife a scare with your relapse.
It maybe she's still a bit traumatised over that.
Don't call your attorney. Sounds like you have a good partner there who's stuck with you through thick and thin.
If you're not sure you want to exercise outside, use whatever you have handy in the home for exercise. Make a game of it - use your imagination - what can I use today?.
All these things will pass, man - surf it out - and don't drink. That would be like throwing a match into gasoline.
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by Dee74 
I think its stressful now for everyone Jeff, your wife included it sounds like.
Its not unheard of for people, scared people, to try and control things when the world itself seems uncontrolled.
You may not like it, but I figure you also gave your wife a scare with your relapse.
It maybe she's still a bit traumatised over that.
Don't call your attorney. Sounds like you have a good partner there who's stuck with you through thick and thin.
If you're not sure you want to exercise outside, use whatever you have handy in the home for exercise. Make a game of it - use your imagination - what can I use today?.
All these things will pass, man - surf it out - and don't drink. That would be like throwing a match into gasoline.
D
Its not unheard of for people, scared people, to try and control things when the world itself seems uncontrolled.
You may not like it, but I figure you also gave your wife a scare with your relapse.
It maybe she's still a bit traumatised over that.
Don't call your attorney. Sounds like you have a good partner there who's stuck with you through thick and thin.
If you're not sure you want to exercise outside, use whatever you have handy in the home for exercise. Make a game of it - use your imagination - what can I use today?.
All these things will pass, man - surf it out - and don't drink. That would be like throwing a match into gasoline.
D
...and yeah, the relapse didn't help my situation much. It was not good for anyone involved. I'm am so glad it is over.
Still a vent though. One that some can relate to.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 3,195
I was just reading an article about how a record number of couples in Wuhan, China have filed for divorce after the mandatory quarantine was lifted. All that time confined together can fray some nerves. Just go for a long walk alone. You'll calm down.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 129
Thomas - with a set of stairs and a sturdy bench or chair and some creativity you can do quite a bit from home, but I totally get it as I'm a gym lover too - the spinning class - 25-30 people getting their spinning work out in, or a swim class with smiling faces of people who I'm familiar with. Just the break from being in the house. But we have options, we just need to figure them out.
And take the opportunity to go out side - walking is fabulous for physical and mental health.
Take it one day at a time.
And take the opportunity to go out side - walking is fabulous for physical and mental health.
Take it one day at a time.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
I am stressed too. My wife comes home from work and wants a hug. Ahhh! She is a pharm tech. Delivers meds all over a hospital.
Fortunately, anyone admitted to the hospital with signs of the virus are quarantined. But, you never know.
Regardless, if anyone is going to catch it, it will be us. I must have faith in my immune system.
Anyway....
I tell her to get in the bathroom and wash up and change your clothes.
Now she is pissed because I subconsciously cover my face with my sleeve when she even looks at me.
This is a whole world problem. Basically, every infected person that infects another will cause the covid to grow exponentially.
Eventually, the weakest will pass away. There is no other way.
The goal is to use technology to slow or cure it so folks can live to 100 again without having to lock themselves in a dungeon.
I think social media has done helped in this case for education. Without this we might have partied it up much longer and been at the mercy of the rating hungry news media.
The best info. I have gotten came from the internet. Sort of like me getting sober.
I may never go back to work. We are on a,paid week off and then I am on vacation. If I quit I can survive and try to enjoy what I have left of my life.
The 5 or so years I planned on working won't make a difference when I am gasping for air someday.
Be brave, smart, and have a laugh. Crying just makes me sad.
Thanks for the vent.
Love.
Fortunately, anyone admitted to the hospital with signs of the virus are quarantined. But, you never know.
Regardless, if anyone is going to catch it, it will be us. I must have faith in my immune system.
Anyway....
I tell her to get in the bathroom and wash up and change your clothes.
Now she is pissed because I subconsciously cover my face with my sleeve when she even looks at me.
This is a whole world problem. Basically, every infected person that infects another will cause the covid to grow exponentially.
Eventually, the weakest will pass away. There is no other way.
The goal is to use technology to slow or cure it so folks can live to 100 again without having to lock themselves in a dungeon.
I think social media has done helped in this case for education. Without this we might have partied it up much longer and been at the mercy of the rating hungry news media.
The best info. I have gotten came from the internet. Sort of like me getting sober.
I may never go back to work. We are on a,paid week off and then I am on vacation. If I quit I can survive and try to enjoy what I have left of my life.
The 5 or so years I planned on working won't make a difference when I am gasping for air someday.
Be brave, smart, and have a laugh. Crying just makes me sad.
Thanks for the vent.
Love.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,511
Jeff, these are stressful times, but hopefully you can find some way to work out without going to a gym. There are lots of great videos on Youtube. I'm still able to get out to walk in quiet areas around here. Can you do that?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
I can relate to the frustration you feel about the gym shutting down. Fitness is one of the main focuses of my sobriety, it's been a major part of my journey. Not going to the gym is a real challenge. But so what, I'm going to have to figure other ways. Sounds like you will too.
luring sobriety this way with my lucky charm
Join Date: Mar 2020
Location: California
Posts: 738
Could you walk or jog outdoors or is it too crowded where you live? If you have some open space, quiet roads, or forest to hike or run through you could still exercise and not buy a bike.
Or buy a bike. Used ones are cheap. Tell your wife you love her but you need this for your mental and physical health, for your sobriety.
Or buy a bike. Used ones are cheap. Tell your wife you love her but you need this for your mental and physical health, for your sobriety.
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
I'm not worried about my sobriety, but I love going to the gym. It's a newly found pleasure since I retired. They haven't closed yet, although we are all wiping with antiseptic wipes and being as hygienic as we can.
I'll be upset if they close but I've already worked out a routine at home.
I'll be upset if they close but I've already worked out a routine at home.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 675
Gyms haven't shut down here yet (to my knowledge) so I can and will be going starting tomorrow.. But yoga/pilates has been my main source of exercise and that has closed, so I decided to have a several day long sugar and junk food free for all. Not feeling great about it now.
Really should take this as an opportunity to start hiking and/or just walking outside. Hopefully your wife will come around, sounds like she might be in a hyper-vigilant hoarding mentality about money as many people seem to be about one thing or another.. but as long as it's within reason I'd say maybe just buy it anyway.
Really should take this as an opportunity to start hiking and/or just walking outside. Hopefully your wife will come around, sounds like she might be in a hyper-vigilant hoarding mentality about money as many people seem to be about one thing or another.. but as long as it's within reason I'd say maybe just buy it anyway.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by Anna
Jeff, these are stressful times, but hopefully you can find some way to work out without going to a gym. There are lots of great videos on Youtube. I'm still able to get out to walk in quiet areas around here. Can you do that?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Posts: 546
Re exercising outdoors:
A perplexing observation here: During my unexpected days off this week I have taken my dogs to a certain park, a miles-long linear park along the river, where one usually sees runners, cyclists, strollers, and dog-walkers in abundance all day long, from the pre-work joggers at pre-dawn, well into the evening. There are various sections where the park widens out with multiple walking and cycling paths and wide lawns for game-playing or picnicking (when it gets warmer). Even when it's busy it is easy to stay yards away from others by slightly altering your course when you see someone headed in your general direction.
So why has the place been like a ghost town this week? Yesterday in the course of an hour-long walk and training session with one of my dogs, we saw maybe ten people using the park (we were never closer than 50 yards (45.72 meters) to any one of them), when normally there would be several dozens passing through the area in that amount of time.
I would think with everything shutting down (yes, including gyms here in Massachusetts) and people cooped up at home, lots of folks would be out for a stroll, run, or a bike ride in the fresh air.
Anyways, I recommend it. And yes, as someone said, a used bicycle can be very cheap, way less than a divorce lawyer for example. I've biked a lot in my day (still do, a little less in my qualify-for-senior-discount days), so no matter the price, make sure the bike is a proper fit, and a style you will like, or it will end up gathering dust along with (for many) the treadmill and the (broken) home-rowing machine.
And wear a helmet -- it would be ironic indeed if, by trying to get in some healthy exercise and local sightseeing, you set yourself up for a trip to the emergency room at a practically locked-down hospital.
A perplexing observation here: During my unexpected days off this week I have taken my dogs to a certain park, a miles-long linear park along the river, where one usually sees runners, cyclists, strollers, and dog-walkers in abundance all day long, from the pre-work joggers at pre-dawn, well into the evening. There are various sections where the park widens out with multiple walking and cycling paths and wide lawns for game-playing or picnicking (when it gets warmer). Even when it's busy it is easy to stay yards away from others by slightly altering your course when you see someone headed in your general direction.
So why has the place been like a ghost town this week? Yesterday in the course of an hour-long walk and training session with one of my dogs, we saw maybe ten people using the park (we were never closer than 50 yards (45.72 meters) to any one of them), when normally there would be several dozens passing through the area in that amount of time.
I would think with everything shutting down (yes, including gyms here in Massachusetts) and people cooped up at home, lots of folks would be out for a stroll, run, or a bike ride in the fresh air.
Anyways, I recommend it. And yes, as someone said, a used bicycle can be very cheap, way less than a divorce lawyer for example. I've biked a lot in my day (still do, a little less in my qualify-for-senior-discount days), so no matter the price, make sure the bike is a proper fit, and a style you will like, or it will end up gathering dust along with (for many) the treadmill and the (broken) home-rowing machine.
And wear a helmet -- it would be ironic indeed if, by trying to get in some healthy exercise and local sightseeing, you set yourself up for a trip to the emergency room at a practically locked-down hospital.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
I worry about the pandemic some. I'm in the high risk group being over 70, with occasional asthma, and having lived 40 years near a mine that belched asbestos into air. I don't fear the idea of dying, but I'd rather not spend my last days starring at it in the face, either.
This is the extreme example of having no control over something else. Manage this situation with a bit of grace and dignity, and consider it personal growth. I know it's hard, but if you miss the flu this year, there will probably be a flu shot for it next year.
The statistics for your survival are still very much in your favor.
This is the extreme example of having no control over something else. Manage this situation with a bit of grace and dignity, and consider it personal growth. I know it's hard, but if you miss the flu this year, there will probably be a flu shot for it next year.
The statistics for your survival are still very much in your favor.
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