mistory5

I went to my aunts funeral and ended up drinking with my cousins....the drinkers. I didn't think twice when they asked me to go sit at the bar with them. The place where the repass was held had a dam bar. Well that one long island ice tea on Friday afternoon at the repass turned into continuous drinking into Sunday evening. I really want to tell my sponsor but I'm scared to. I refuse to keep drinking, I'm going to dust myself off and get back to not drinking.. I got the courage up to tell my sponsor this morning but she didn't answer the phone but now I'm thinking maybe that was a sign I just better not tell her. Has anyone else been scared to tell their sponsor they relapsed.

ScottFromWI

You just told us exactly what happened in a few sentences, I would just tell your sponsor the same thing. Honesty is the cornerstone of your relationship with your sponsor, and yes it is scary/embarrassing to admit that you drank. But what could you possibly gain from not telling other than mistrust? I would be willing to bet your spnsor already knows if you called at the end of the weekend and didn’t leave a message. They are there to help you...you have to let them do so.

Hawkeye13

Own it and be honest or it will eat at you.

Good job on making it a blip instead of a binge. . .

Steely

Tell her, just as you have told us.

If she is a responsible sponsor she will understand and work with you to move past it. Don't be scared. Maybe regretful, but not scared.

I don't think it was a 'sign' that she didn't answer the phone. And I do think you want to tell her. And so you should, she's your sponsor. There needs to be trust. Trust her.

Noam19

I'm not a sponsor, and never have had one, but Scott is right...just be straightforward and honest.

DayTrader

Doesn't sound like a sign to NOT tell her but more-so a test of whether you can be honest with your sponsor or not. Lying by omission isn't any more healthy than lying directly.

cantsleep123

I don't think someone answering or not answering a phone is a sign of anything other than they were/weren't available in that moment. Don't hold information back from your sponsor and maybe next time actually use them before you pick up that drink. That's what they are there for.

mistory5

I just told her and I'm glad I did. She was very understanding and supportive. We are going to meet in person around 330pm. I don't feel as bad as I did and I definitely don't want to drink. Just got to get through the physical discomfort I'm having now. Thanks everyone for your replies. You all were right.

August252015

Proud of you. Such a hard and scary thing. TBH I have been having some kind of fear of relapse or similar lately and this dread of what would happen if I did. It's part of the insanity of my alcoholism indeed.

Great job - one thing about the program is that we want every single person to keep coming back.

Anna

Good for you for calling your sponsor so that you can begin to move on. Hopefully your meeting this afternoon will be helpful.

DayTrader

GOOD FOR YOU! Not telling on yourself and hiding the truth is the type of crap we do in our addiction. I'm glad you were honest no matter how it worked out.

mistory5

ty, I sure hope so. im going to her house and she said she said we would have hot tea and if I wanted to talk about it and if I don't it's ok. But I want to talk about it. This morning when I talked to her I kept saying the same things over and over. I kept talking about exactly what happened and the fact that I didn't use any tools to avoid the first drink.

August252015

Let us know how it goes. Proud of you. And being repetitive is a-ok

Hopingwishing

Mistory-well done and good luck. Report back to us how it goes. I'm sure she'll be able to share some pearls of wisdom with you.

Steely

She sounds like a great sponsor mistory.

Getting honest always feels good. Very happy for you.

brighterday1234

Dee74

I'm glad you told her

D

August252015

How are ya feeling mistory? What's the agenda for today, and I mean anything planned "to do" for life or recovery?

Keep going.

mistory5

Hi , I finally told grand sponsor by text that I relapsed but haven't spoken to her. I plan on seeing her tonight at a 530pm beginners meeting and my homegroup business meeting. I'm going back and forth about if I want to share at the beginners meeting about relapse or just with certain people after the meetings. I'm trying to connect with God but having a hard time

ShilohWon

Just do it. You'll feel better afterwards. If you don't do it, it will eat you up inside, perhaps leading to another spree.