Twig36

I have been married for 34 years. My husband has abused drugs and alcohol since he was 10 years old. He has had times of being sober. Like before we got married and a few years here and there. Right now he is drinking and smoking pot, at least that is all I know about. He went to AA for a year because of an arrest. After the year though he stopped going. I don't know if ever did any of the steps.

After so many years of being codependent I started going to Al Anon and have been to two meetings.

We have two grown children. One is in jail accused of doing something. He doesn't know if he did it or not because he was drunk and on drugs. The other son lives with us. I knew he drank there was evidence of it. He has been functioning better than his father so I didn't really let myself think about it.

Last night this son, who was drunk at the time, told me he was tired of the drinking and he couldn't control it. It broke my heart. I asked him to come with me when I go to my Al Anon meeting and go to the AA meeting that meets down the hall. He said he would.

Right now I just feel crushed. Like it is hard to breath.

Surrendered19

Welcome Twig36. Our capacity to worry about our kids is eternal isn't it? You are his Mum so you will feel crushing worry regardless. But you gave him great advice and it sounds like he will at least try. My daughters are 16 and 18 and I have spent my 68 days sober talking with them about many things, including their family history and the likelihood of them having highly addictive personalities. Alcoholism runs rampant on both sides of their family. I appreciate you sharing your story here. It really helps people like me.

Reid82

That's a very difficult home situation you have- you'll find some great support here.

Dee74

I'm so sorry for what brings you here twig - but this is a place of great support understanding and hope.

I hope you'll also check out our Friends and Family forums as well
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/#friends-family

welcome to SR

D

PhoenixJ

Prayers

Steely

You've done well Twig in offering such sound advice and support to your son. Good mother.

I think it's great that your son felt able to approach you. Many kids don't. He must trust you. I've got kids too and I know how you feel. Guilt, fear, sorrow....emotions, all.

I hope everything works out for you all.

Most importantly keep returning here for the support you will need for yourself.

bradly22

Thank you for posting. This whole thing can be a tricky beast to deal with. It does sound like your son is making a decision to finally outgrow this thing. Best of luck to you and your family.

Anna

I'm sorry for your situation. It must be so hard seeing your two boys dealing with addiction. I hope you can find some peace.

least

Welcome to the family. I hope the support you find here, and at AlAnon, can help you find some peace of mind in your situation.

ptown

Sending positive thoughts. It hurts me to hear that your son is going through this. Thinking about telling my mom the same thing would break my heart.