tomls

Hey guys! I remember during one of my failed attempts at sobriety I was at an AA meeting and a guy said that he had eight years of sobriety and was at a relatives wedding and they passed out glasses. He said that he was terrified that he was going to have to drink some champagne. He said he got out of there as fast as he could! I thought after eight years? I keep that in mind as a reminder that it never leaves you completely and I can't get complacent with this disease. Thank you all for being here and have a great day!

sugarbear1

I ask tell a wait staff person that I want ginger ale in a champagne flute. Not a problem. Sometimes I just toast with water. We don't have to fear alcohol today.

aasharon90

If you are living and breathing your recovery
life, then you will intuitively know what to do
in situations that arise when involving alcohol.

Thanks for sharing Tom.

August252015

^Yes!

And I've found in my headed to anniversary #4 that those intuitive moments can crop up at any time and certainly unexpectedly. It isn't even about the alcohol itself for me. It was a bizarre experience last fall when I had my ever present sparkling water w lime glass on the dresser, and glanced over and could have sworn it was a vodka with lime. Weird, of course!

Glad you are sharing.

Dee74

It takes some practice to not have that panicked reaction, I think?

I was at my familys Christmas do and someone offered me a Pimms Punch - I'd read about it in Agatha Christie but I had no idea it was alcoholic

luckily my Dad of all people spoke up - I declined it...no problem.

D

brighterday1234

nez

Quantity doesn't necessarily equate with quality. When I had been skiing for 8 years, I was far better at it than some people I knew that had been skiing for 20 years; but then I worked at skiing, I immersed myself in skiing, I pushed myself and my boundaries of comfort, I skied 100+ days a year. Those 20 year people maybe skied 7 days a year on groomed easy slopes.

At 8 years of recovery, alcohol did not scare me, but my recovery was pursued liked my skiing. Today I am comfortable around alcohol, which is good because I work in the hospitality industry. I order alcohol for the business and guests. I talk alcohol with guests and vendors. I serve alcohol to guests. I create and produce alcohol and food pairing dinners. I do not drink alcohol. Alcohol is not the bogeyman. The bogeyman used to be in my head, but he is like Elvis...He has left the building!

August252015

^Brilliant, nez!

zerothehero

As a musician I find myself surrounded by people who are drinking and getting high. In early sobriety I let it annoy me. After a couple of years I found I could "party" with them without drinking. I trust myself, and I don't want to drink or get high, anyway, so no big whoop.

As for toasts, if someone doesn't hand me something I can drink, I've been known to toast with my thumb. Thumbs up, eh? I was handed champagne for a new year toast a couple of years ago, and I held up the glass for the toast, then handed it to a friend.

There's no reason to feel like you "have to drink champagne" or anything else. Your AA peer had a moment. It's not the rule. When I have dinner parties people are asked to bring whatever they want to drink. Some invariably gets left in my fridge. It stays there, and then I can offer something other than seltzer to future guests. Heck, once in a great while I go to the liquor store to buy a bottle of wine as a gift. I have friends who like wine and drink moderately. Who am I to judge?

Everybody is different. In early sobriety I steered clear from alcohol (except for live music). At a certain point I decided I needed to get over myself and stop living in fear of relapse. I just made a permanent decision, I'm a nondrinker, and the rest of the world can and will do whatever they want. And people don't judge me for not drinking or using because they can see I keep having a good time and I'm healthier for it.

Besides, if people want to judge me, I'd rather be judged for having it together than for being willing to risk my health and happiness.

I wonder sometimes if "one day at a time" creates fear of tomorrow. I personally believe "just for today" isn't enough. I needed to say "never again," and I still remind myself of that regularly.

Hodd

zoobadger

My recovery muscles tend to be fully flexed when I'm at social events involving alcohol, and it's not all that challenging.

it's at unexpected times and places when the drinking thoughts or cravings emerge.

Often in the morning. Which, I remind myself, would only would happen if you're an alcoholic. Normal people don't crave alcohol at 7AM.

Anna

I agree with not letting yourself get complacent, but focusing on your recovery is the way to get through tough times.

saoutchik

Pimms Fruit Cup. Oh lordy.

My then wife and I went to watch the tennis at Wimbledon in the early 2000's. Our daughters, aged 14 and 12 at the time asked for some Pimms (it might have been advertised on tv at Wimbledon time) My ex and myself said ok thinking it was wine mixed with lemonade and fruit. We didn't know it was gin. We had to leave in the middle of a Jennifer Capriati match when they were became loud and horrible. We received some fairly disgusted looks from folks who probably assumed we were awful parents. My ex was a big tennis fan too so it was a double blow to her.

Dee74

Not sure what gave me the idea it was like cordial but yeah - an experience best missed Sao

nez

It is so great that today I don't sweat any drinking experiences that I missed out on...and there ain't many! LOL :~)