80 hours
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 89
80 hours
I’m here 80 hours in, without a drop. That’s 3 days and 8 hours. I’ve gone ten weeks before so this is no where near my longest but I’m so grateful I managed to stop at all, just 3 short days ago I didn’t know if could even get here. I’m sure I’m past the danger zone regarding withdrawal now - very healthy appetite and the weird jerkiness of my body has mostly gone away. And today I actually feel sober. I binged watched a Netflix series last night to take the edge off and have my mind focussed on something else. I can’t even think about college right now though, I messaged my tutor without going into details and she said that’s fine and to take the time I need.
I’m not sure where life will take me now, it sounds silly but I feel I really can’t focus on anything but the here and now at this moment in time. All I know about is hat I want from my life right now is to be sober, that’s all I want. Just wanted to check in and thank you all again for helping me the last week or so, it’s been very humbling and is much appreciated ❤️
I’m not sure where life will take me now, it sounds silly but I feel I really can’t focus on anything but the here and now at this moment in time. All I know about is hat I want from my life right now is to be sober, that’s all I want. Just wanted to check in and thank you all again for helping me the last week or so, it’s been very humbling and is much appreciated ❤️
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Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 533
Originally Posted by Surrendered19 
A lot different than 4 days ago SM. That is awesome. Clear, calm, liberated and on our right roads. That is what the decade of the 20's needs to be for us.
Clear, calm, liberated...
I'll second that!
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 89
5 days in. Well, it’s a start!
I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now I’m just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, I’m a Brit!).
Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, it’s the only life I’ve ever known. I’ve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.
Happy Sunday everyone
I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now I’m just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, I’m a Brit!).
Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, it’s the only life I’ve ever known. I’ve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.
Happy Sunday everyone
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Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 400
Originally Posted by SuperMario
5 days in. Well, it’s a start!
I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now I’m just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, I’m a Brit!).
Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, it’s the only life I’ve ever known. I’ve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.
Happy Sunday everyone
I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now I’m just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, I’m a Brit!).
Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, it’s the only life I’ve ever known. I’ve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.
Happy Sunday everyone
Its great to have those first five days over you.
It makes perfect sense what you say about knowing how to be a responsible adult. I guess step by step you'll figure things out. Getting sober is a good start.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
That is great SuperMario. Sorry you are feeling down at the moment but your trajectory is good right? Remember the hangovers. Mine were soul-crushing whole body affairs. A bit down, but calm, clear and quiet in your mind is so preferable to that right? I wouldn't look at it as leaving your old life behind if that looms too large. Not all of you is being left behind. Just the drinking part. You are still here with us and are a fully formed person with worth. You just don't drink anymore.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 308
I was in the same boat with the depression at around day 15. All I wanted to do was lay in bed and tune out the world. That lasted for about 5 days and thankfully has passed. Now I’m at the stage where im trying to figure out what to do with my new sober life. I have sooooo much time on my hands now and trying to relearn old hobbies and start new ones without the drinking has been a challenge. It’s getting better day by day but I know it’s going to take time to reverse 20 years of alcoholic thinking. You can do this!
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
I feel you SuperMario! I never drank til I was out of high school but in retrospect I can say I also had a problem pretty much the moment I began. Immediately I realized I didn't drink like 'normal people'.
The first few days are rough, and the first month can be disorienting. If you're like I was, ordering my entire life around drinking, then not drinking upsets the entire pattern of life. Please believe that it will eventually reorder into a much better pattern!
The first few days are rough, and the first month can be disorienting. If you're like I was, ordering my entire life around drinking, then not drinking upsets the entire pattern of life. Please believe that it will eventually reorder into a much better pattern!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,909
Originally Posted by SuperMario
5 days in. Well, it’s a start!
I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now I’m just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, I’m a Brit!).
Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, it’s the only life I’ve ever known. I’ve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.
Happy Sunday everyone
I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now I’m just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, I’m a Brit!).
Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, it’s the only life I’ve ever known. I’ve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.
Happy Sunday everyone
I hope you continue to check in. What you write makes a lot of sense. When we were active alcoholics, we never matured into healthy adulthood and never developed healthy ways of dealing with life. Feeling sad is normal and totally OK. As you continue with sobriety, you will feel more and more confident in it and find your ways to build a new life. Life that will truly be your own and in which you will recognize yourself. ❤️
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