5 months!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 524
5 months!
This is the furthest I've got since I decided to quit drinking in May 2018.
I managed four and a half months last year before I relapsed, but I've learnt a lot from relapsing. The most important lesson? You aren't missing anything. It's a complete waste of time drinking and you don't get what you think you are going to get. The high and buzz from living a healthy life sober is a million times better than chemical intoxication by poison.
I can genuinely say I feel high on life. This is how we were meant to live. We were not put on this earth to regularly poison ourselves with alcohol. Sure, I have days where I feel tired or stressed, or sometimes a bit low, but it is nothing compared to the hell I endured so often as a drinker.
I know that no matter how tough or stressful life may get, nothing can make it as bad as drinking. As long as I don't drink, I'll be fine. It really does get better and better. I noticed a big improvement around 3 - 4 months. Now at 5 months I feel fantastic.
To put it into context, last year I couldn't leave the house I was so full of anxiety and fear caused by my alcohol dependence. I was unemployable. I sought relief and respite by drinking more alcohol, that is the sick and twisted nature of alcohol addiction, it makes you rely on it even more so you get even more sick. It consumes you and you become a shell of a person living a shell of a life.
Now, I travel halfway cross the city to work every day, I am focused, reliable, sharp in mind, my anxiety has gone, I am living my best life. When I quit drinking, I had to think of a motto to reflect the new life I wanted, and a phrase came to me. "I want to be the best man I can be". Physically, mentally and spiritually. A man free from the prison of alcohol dependence.
I managed four and a half months last year before I relapsed, but I've learnt a lot from relapsing. The most important lesson? You aren't missing anything. It's a complete waste of time drinking and you don't get what you think you are going to get. The high and buzz from living a healthy life sober is a million times better than chemical intoxication by poison.
I can genuinely say I feel high on life. This is how we were meant to live. We were not put on this earth to regularly poison ourselves with alcohol. Sure, I have days where I feel tired or stressed, or sometimes a bit low, but it is nothing compared to the hell I endured so often as a drinker.
I know that no matter how tough or stressful life may get, nothing can make it as bad as drinking. As long as I don't drink, I'll be fine. It really does get better and better. I noticed a big improvement around 3 - 4 months. Now at 5 months I feel fantastic.
To put it into context, last year I couldn't leave the house I was so full of anxiety and fear caused by my alcohol dependence. I was unemployable. I sought relief and respite by drinking more alcohol, that is the sick and twisted nature of alcohol addiction, it makes you rely on it even more so you get even more sick. It consumes you and you become a shell of a person living a shell of a life.
Now, I travel halfway cross the city to work every day, I am focused, reliable, sharp in mind, my anxiety has gone, I am living my best life. When I quit drinking, I had to think of a motto to reflect the new life I wanted, and a phrase came to me. "I want to be the best man I can be". Physically, mentally and spiritually. A man free from the prison of alcohol dependence.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 1,614
Way to go my friend. And you right we aint missing nothing. I'm at 198 days myself. Yeah theres life but now its manageable. We are trully blessed my friend. So you lurkers if you want to feel what we feel. Come join us on this journey. Congrats on your sober time. ✌
Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: Boston MA
Posts: 726
thank you for these words- This paragraph is exactly how I was feeling-
Shell of a person and yes unemployable. Just kept drinking.
I am going to record this in my Sober Journal because it describes me to a T
To put it into context, last year I couldn't leave the house I was so full of anxiety and fear caused by my alcohol dependence. I was unemployable. I sought relief and respite by drinking more alcohol, that is the sick and twisted nature of alcohol addiction, it makes you rely on it even more so you get even more sick. It consumes you and you become a shell of a person living a shell of a life.
Good for you- and Congrats!!! Five months is amazing! what an inspiration
Now, I travel halfway cross the city to work every day, I am focused, reliable, sharp in mind, my anxiety has gone, I am living my best life. When I quit drinking, I had to think of a motto to reflect the new life I wanted, and a phrase came to me. "I want to be the best man I can be". Physically, mentally and spiritually. A man free from the prison of alcohol dependence.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 433
I can related, anxiety and complete panic attack fear of situations pushed me into agoraphobia. I would go into gas stations, grocery stores, etc and leave items on the conveyor belt even if I made it that far. I would shake so bad I normally couldn't use a credit/debit reader to pay for items. The complete humiliation of these events mixed with other even worse events helped to guide me to the right track.
Once I stopped all the anxiety and fear when away almost just a fast as it appeared after 14 years of heavy drinking. I'm thankful for that. I sometime wonder if my subconscious or another outside factor equated cards/cash to alcohol and one part was rejecting the usage. I was typically fine over the phone and at work (although miserable).
5 months is great! All experiences and future experiences I wish the best for you.
Once I stopped all the anxiety and fear when away almost just a fast as it appeared after 14 years of heavy drinking. I'm thankful for that. I sometime wonder if my subconscious or another outside factor equated cards/cash to alcohol and one part was rejecting the usage. I was typically fine over the phone and at work (although miserable).
5 months is great! All experiences and future experiences I wish the best for you.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2019
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 580
Thanks OP!.... And mentioning Joe as well. Right now I feel just the way of you used to be -- unfortunately my anxiety is through the roof and acts of self-pity are default. ..My alcoholism convinces me that the only way to make it through the intense phobias and intrusive thoughts are to take a drink, just the right amount to put it off. Sick I am.
Im not even knowing how to get myself past a couple days. The more sober I become; the more.helpless and doomed I feel. Like the world is crashing down on me.
Last night I drove home wailing and pleading to God to help me Please. Please. Aint nothin cute or fun or cool about addiction.
Im not even knowing how to get myself past a couple days. The more sober I become; the more.helpless and doomed I feel. Like the world is crashing down on me.
Last night I drove home wailing and pleading to God to help me Please. Please. Aint nothin cute or fun or cool about addiction.
Early recovery can be rough, but not as rough as a drinking life.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
