Day 34
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 335
Day 34
34 days since my last drink,
My brother phoned me the other day, he is the male version of me, there is six of us, 4 boys 2 girls, 4 of them are all turned good living going to bible studies, church, and generally being gods children, they wernt always like this but they have found there peace, so anyway back to the other brother, he rang to talk as he always does, said we must get a catch up, come down for a drink, I said I'm trying to stay off it, but il come down anyway, no drink,
Well since then it's been going through my mind, sure I could maybe just drink a couple, then I'm arguing with myself in my head that I don't need or want it, but still it keeps talking, I haven't made any plans yet to visit, maybe I'm not strong enough yet
My brother phoned me the other day, he is the male version of me, there is six of us, 4 boys 2 girls, 4 of them are all turned good living going to bible studies, church, and generally being gods children, they wernt always like this but they have found there peace, so anyway back to the other brother, he rang to talk as he always does, said we must get a catch up, come down for a drink, I said I'm trying to stay off it, but il come down anyway, no drink,
Well since then it's been going through my mind, sure I could maybe just drink a couple, then I'm arguing with myself in my head that I don't need or want it, but still it keeps talking, I haven't made any plans yet to visit, maybe I'm not strong enough yet
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,368
sure I could maybe just drink a couple,
Its the first drink that starts the madness Boggle, not the last.
I had to treasure my recovery and make decisions based on that.
Being around a drinker is maybe not the best thing for early recovery.
well done on 34 days
D
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 652
Congratulations on 34 days!
Whether you decide to go or not you might find Dee's social situation survival guide useful going forward;
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...val-guide.html (Social Occasion Survival Guide)
Whether you decide to go or not you might find Dee's social situation survival guide useful going forward;
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...val-guide.html (Social Occasion Survival Guide)
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
34 days is brilliant, Boggle. It's certainly not worth "a couple." Really, what satisfaction would that give you? If it were me, I can only see two possibilities:
1) I'd think, "Well that was dumb." Sort of like the ruefulness I feel after eating a piece of not particularly good cake.
2) I'd think, "I've ruined my 34 days now - might as well make it worth it by getting drunk."
Is there a reason that having a drink is a necessary part of seeing your brother? Could you instead meet at your home, go for an ice cream, wander around a park? Does your brother know you've decided you're done with drinking? If he's the male version of you, I'll bet he'd be chuffed.*
O
* I'm so pleased to have a legitimate opportunity to use "chuffed" in a sentence.
1) I'd think, "Well that was dumb." Sort of like the ruefulness I feel after eating a piece of not particularly good cake.
2) I'd think, "I've ruined my 34 days now - might as well make it worth it by getting drunk."
Is there a reason that having a drink is a necessary part of seeing your brother? Could you instead meet at your home, go for an ice cream, wander around a park? Does your brother know you've decided you're done with drinking? If he's the male version of you, I'll bet he'd be chuffed.*
O
* I'm so pleased to have a legitimate opportunity to use "chuffed" in a sentence.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: Boston MA
Posts: 726
Congrats on your 34 days Boggle! I was at that place yesterday myself romanticizing a couple of drinks. I am so grateful/fortunate/relieved I woke up
sober. Two drinks for me would constitute 40 minutes- what would I do with the other 23 hours and 20 minutes of the day-obsess/lose control/be uncomfortable /shamed and ultimately drink until I pass out.
I can not wait to get my 30 day chip- 34 days is a miracle
Awesome
sober. Two drinks for me would constitute 40 minutes- what would I do with the other 23 hours and 20 minutes of the day-obsess/lose control/be uncomfortable /shamed and ultimately drink until I pass out.
I can not wait to get my 30 day chip- 34 days is a miracle
Awesome
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Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 204
Originally Posted by Boggle10 
he rang to talk as he always does, said we must get a catch up, come down for a drink, I said I'm trying to stay off it, but il come down anyway, no drink,
Are you sure you're done with drinking? Your wording doesn't convey that to me. Are you "trying" to stay off it or are you done with it?? It seems different to me. I think he needs to hear you say that you don't drink anymore. That, to me, seems a lot more final than just trying.
I tried many times, but I wasn't done with it until now!
Just my thoughts.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
34 days is awesome Boggle! And good posts from others above - and for me, I didn't do or go anywhere that stressed me out in any way, for a long time actually. I knew I had to be and wanted to be DONE drinking - everything I did and everyone I spent time with (including fam) supported that.
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 335
Thank you for all the replys and words of wisdom, my brother knows I am done with this crap he was one of my biggest supporters last time I quit, I am a 48 Yr old not in my 20s anymore, life is short and not worth the hangovers, well saying that its not a hangover if you never sober up long enough to have a hangover, no il go down a few hours and be the designated driver and il cook for him and his wife, I probably worded my thread wrong. Its that voice in my head that just needs to shut up x
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 335
Thank you for all the replys and words of wisdom, my brother knows I am done with this crap he was one of my biggest supporters last time I quit, I am a 48 Yr old not in my 20s anymore, life is short and not worth the hangovers, well saying that its not a hangover if you never sober up long enough to have a hangover, no il go down a few hours and be the designated driver and il cook for him and his wife, I probably worded my thread wrong. Its that voice in my head that just needs to shut up x
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 335
Mag, my word I'm trying ment at the moment I'm doing the best that I can in this moment, to me if I tell myself I'm never going to drink again. It would be like being on a diet, I can't have cake, then I'd want that cake, I know in my heart I'm done with booze and at the minute I'm doing OK, I hope by the grace of God I can keep it up, I hope this makes sence,
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 652
Originally Posted by Boggle10
Thank you for all the replys and words of wisdom, my brother knows I am done with this crap he was one of my biggest supporters last time I quit, I am a 48 Yr old not in my 20s anymore, life is short and not worth the hangovers, well saying that its not a hangover if you never sober up long enough to have a hangover, no il go down a few hours and be the designated driver and il cook for him and his wife, I probably worded my thread wrong. Its that voice in my head that just needs to shut up x
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