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The downsides of sobriety

Old 10-07-2019, 07:24 AM
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The downsides of sobriety

Bit of irony in the title. Bit of a daft thread, but here goes.

I just read NicLin’s great thread about blood pressure. Their BP is now nice and healthy after quitting alcohol, and I had a similar result. A doctor would probably prescribe BP medication, which can have side effects, when quitting booze can (not always) have the same effect.

I’ve also lost a load of weight, my liver went from fatty to fully healthy (surprisingly quickly too) and I’m a nicer person, sometimes 😀

If I was forced to give a downside, I’d struggle. OK then, there are places and even countries I like but probably won’t visit again as I wouldn’t know what to do as I’d previously just drunk there. I also see some friends a lot less as they go to bars (as sensible drinkers) and I’d get bored.

I wouldnt trade a thing for the life I have now. The above two reasons are not even reasons.

Anyone have any downsides? Might be a very short thread. 😀
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Old 10-07-2019, 07:37 AM
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I might have thought there were some negatives to sobriety in the first year. Part of me was still wistful about drinking, even though I knew that quitting was something I had to do.

But in the course of eight alcohol-free years, my perspective on sobriety has changed. There are only upsides. I was chained to alcohol and to drinking by my addiction. There are only downsides to drinking; none to not drinking.
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Old 10-07-2019, 08:18 AM
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Only downside I can think of is sometimes feeling a tiny bit left out when others do things that revolve around drinking and I'm not invited. Yesterday, a bunch of my friends when on a little tour of local wineries - they rented a party bus and by all accounts, had a great time. Of course, I wasn't invited, which was perfectly fine as it held little interest for me, really, but at the same time, I had a few minutes of wishing I was along for the ride, if only for the social aspect of it. On the other hand, this morning I'm hearing that a couple of people got pretty drunk, and I would have been one of them if I were still drinking and had gone. Instead, I got a lot of things done around my house yesterday and I'm at work bright and early this morning, no hangover and no regrets.
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Old 10-07-2019, 08:24 AM
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The only downside is that I didn't discover how great it is earlier than I did!
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Old 10-07-2019, 08:33 AM
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Oftentimes when I look back fondly on old drinking days I find what I’m really missing is that point in my life. I had friends, was fit and thin, had a good career. But, the booze ruined all that.

Sober for a year now and I have a healthy family, no fighting between husband and I surrounding drinking. Have a beautiful baby girl that strangers often refer to as a living doll. Starting to gain friendships again and am slowly but surely losing the baby weight. Weeded out unhealthy family relationships. Things are beginning to look up.

A new career will come in time and I’m sure I’ll do better then I did in the past due to no booze.
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Old 10-07-2019, 08:42 AM
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Drinking made me lazy and self-indulgent. A day to myself and a box of wine was “a plan”. I put on weight, and was a red, bloated, dehydrated (amazing how you can be both!) mess.

I despised myself for that self-indulgence, and feel much better now that I’m back in shape and alive. But I do sometimes miss being able to slough off the responsibilities of adulting and just wallow.

-bora
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Old 10-07-2019, 09:47 AM
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For me its taking so long to flip the script. Never knew what I was missing . enjoying all 156 days of it so far.
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Old 10-07-2019, 01:12 PM
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Originally Posted by MLD51 View Post
a bunch of my friends when on a little tour of local wineries .
But I thought they were supposed to spit the wine out? That really would be the ultimate test of self-control for an ex-drinker!

Whilst I’d walk out on anyone that expected me to drink, I do miss some friends who drink sensibly. I still meet them but less often. I told them I’d become dependent and stopped drinking forever, and they had no problem at all.


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Old 10-07-2019, 01:16 PM
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Originally Posted by newhope01 View Post
Sober for a year now and I have a healthy family, no fighting between husband and I
Well done, nice to hear.

I wonder what it is about alcohol that makes us less tolerant? Even if I hadn’t drunk on a particular day, I’d often fly off the handle over the smallest of matters. Now I’m so mellow, I’m almost horizontal 😀


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Old 10-07-2019, 02:10 PM
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The downside to sobriety is that I no longer have anyone or anything to blame for my moments of stupidity. The blame strictly is strictly all mine, LOL!..."I couldn't help it...I was drunk" is no longer the number one arrow in my quiver of denial. :~)
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Old 10-07-2019, 02:24 PM
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I can't think of any downsides to sobriety. I'm happy as a lark living sober and wish I'd done it sooner.
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Old 10-07-2019, 02:26 PM
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is no more gloom,dispair, and agony a down side?
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Old 10-07-2019, 03:09 PM
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Downsides ... let’s see ... my weight is down. So’s my blood pressure, which my doctor used to nag me about. My spending is also down by a lot.
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Old 10-07-2019, 03:17 PM
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When on cruises several of us went to AA meetings at our port of calls. Always welcomed...and usually was invited to their houses or showed us their cities. Many of the sailors who went out on the town paid for it in the morning. But also, there was organized tours. So no down side of sobriety. All is good.
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Old 10-07-2019, 03:39 PM
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No downsides, here.

All that supposed "fun" I had was a bunch of immaturity (doesn't everyone get drunk when the sun goes down?), self-delusion (those naked girls in the strip joints really like me) and idiotic debauchery (the cops aren't around, are they?).
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Old 10-07-2019, 05:19 PM
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I only come around here when I start to get some odd cravings... can't identify why, but SR always keeps me grounded. I absolutely love this thread and reading the responses. Thanks for posting it!

For me, the downside was how to combat the boredom. When I drank, I drank to get drunk. Not take the edge off. I wanted to black out.. because that's just what I did. I'd wake up with bruises, cuts, scrapes, smelly, just overall not what I wanted to be. Am I perfect now? Ha, far from it! But I have very few regrets, I feel better, and working on being more social even though I'm sober.
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Old 10-07-2019, 05:52 PM
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my downside is I haven't found anything similar YET that gives me the same "relief" that alcohol did...when I drank alcohol...nothing mattered...

I am thinking more healthy now and think that...I just have to find something to DO that I enjoy....which will make nothing else matter.
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Old 10-07-2019, 08:37 PM
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Originally Posted by nez View Post
The downside to sobriety is that I no longer have anyone or anything to blame for my moments of stupidity. The blame strictly is strictly all mine, LOL!..."I couldn't help it...I was drunk" is no longer the number one arrow in my quiver of denial. :~)
HAHAHAHA!!!! I just thought of this the other day! That I had lost the one excuse one can have for when they do something ridiculous or idiotic..."Sorry, I was drunk!"

Funny thing is, I have not lost the silly person I have always been, only know I have more control.

I have yet to see a downside to my getting sober. Life has become so rich so quickly, I actually can show up to events I always wished I could do, I have more friends now than ever before, and I am working out because I don't have the hungover feeling anymore. Life is good.

Not a downside but definitely challenging are the feelings that are coming up throughout this process. I am raw and open for the first time in two decades and that of course comes with pain, shame and guilt and an underlying sadness. But I cannot call it a downside, because even those feelings live within a container of LOVE. I am at peace with these raw emotions and can look at them objectively and asses them now.

Meditation has been key for this awareness.

I did go out to a bar with my girlfriend this past weekend and it did nothing for me. I was between bored and sociable. I told her it was a fun experiment and that I was actually repulsed by the idea of alcohol (I know where it ends for me), and could hang in that setting, but next tim e I would love to just go chat or bowl, anything other than stand at a bar.

Cool to see that a drink doesn't trigger or tempt me, but I am not putting myself in that situation again, nothing to be gained from it.

I second the statement that only downside was not getting sober, but I am exactly where I need to be in this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing , happens in Gods world by mistake.
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Old 10-07-2019, 08:50 PM
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Not a single one!!
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Old 10-07-2019, 10:53 PM
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Originally Posted by Hodd View Post
Bit of irony in the title. Bit of a daft thread, but here goes.

I just read NicLin’s great thread about blood pressure. Their BP is now nice and healthy after quitting alcohol, and I had a similar result. A doctor would probably prescribe BP medication, which can have side effects, when quitting booze can (not always) have the same effect.

I’ve also lost a load of weight, my liver went from fatty to fully healthy (surprisingly quickly too) and I’m a nicer person, sometimes 😀

If I was forced to give a downside, I’d struggle. OK then, there are places and even countries I like but probably won’t visit again as I wouldn’t know what to do as I’d previously just drunk there. I also see some friends a lot less as they go to bars (as sensible drinkers) and I’d get bored.

I wouldnt trade a thing for the life I have now. The above two reasons are not even reasons.

Anyone have any downsides? Might be a very short thread. 😀
Lack of sex (with women I shouldn’t have sex with), lonely (because I don’t spend time with people bad for me now), having to feel (I used to just pour booze on all that feeling stuff), giving a crap about things (was easier to just drink and live in oblivion)

-A newly sober, cranky, lonely, curmudgeon.

ps: I still choose sobriety (day 7)
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