"Shifting" from the Empowered Woman
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"Shifting" from the Empowered Woman
I thought I would share this today because I read it and thought of many of you here.
Shifting....
"As you are shifting, you will begin to realize that you are not the same person you used to be. The things you us to tolerate have become intolerable. When you once remained quiet, you are now speaking your truth. Where you once battled and argued, you are now choosing to remain silent.
You are beginning to understand the value of your voice and there are some situations that no longer deserve your time, energy, and focus."
Wow. Just spot on. I went through this shift and it's an amazing experience.
I will also share that I got a mug from a women's conference over the weekend. It says, "Owning your story is the BRAVEST thing you will ever do." quote by Brene Brown.
(Made me think of you if you are reading this firesprite)!
I love that people are reading and sharing these powerful things. Apply them in your life. You will see a different and stronger person come out on the other side.
Shifting....
"As you are shifting, you will begin to realize that you are not the same person you used to be. The things you us to tolerate have become intolerable. When you once remained quiet, you are now speaking your truth. Where you once battled and argued, you are now choosing to remain silent.
You are beginning to understand the value of your voice and there are some situations that no longer deserve your time, energy, and focus."
Wow. Just spot on. I went through this shift and it's an amazing experience.
I will also share that I got a mug from a women's conference over the weekend. It says, "Owning your story is the BRAVEST thing you will ever do." quote by Brene Brown.
(Made me think of you if you are reading this firesprite)!
I love that people are reading and sharing these powerful things. Apply them in your life. You will see a different and stronger person come out on the other side.
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Excellent stuff! So glad you got to attend a conference like this hopeful - here's another favorite quote along these lines that just came up this week in conversation with a friend - how sitting with our pain & fear can actually help us evolve in a healthier version of ourselves:
"You can be shattered and then you can put yourself back together piece by piece. But what can happen over time is this: You wake up one day and realize that you have put yourself back together completely differently. That you are whole, finally, and strong - but you are now a different shape, a different size. This sort of change- the change that occurs when you sit inside your own pain - it's revolutionary. When you let yourself die, there is suddenly one day: New Life. You are Different. New. And no matter how hard you try, you simply cannot fit into your old life anymore."
~Glennon Doyle
"You can be shattered and then you can put yourself back together piece by piece. But what can happen over time is this: You wake up one day and realize that you have put yourself back together completely differently. That you are whole, finally, and strong - but you are now a different shape, a different size. This sort of change- the change that occurs when you sit inside your own pain - it's revolutionary. When you let yourself die, there is suddenly one day: New Life. You are Different. New. And no matter how hard you try, you simply cannot fit into your old life anymore."
~Glennon Doyle
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Love this so much!
Originally Posted by FireSprite 
Excellent stuff! So glad you got to attend a conference like this hopeful - here's another favorite quote along these lines that just came up this week in conversation with a friend - how sitting with our pain & fear can actually help us evolve in a healthier version of ourselves:
"You can be shattered and then you can put yourself back together piece by piece. But what can happen over time is this: You wake up one day and realize that you have put yourself back together completely differently. That you are whole, finally, and strong - but you are now a different shape, a different size. This sort of change- the change that occurs when you sit inside your own pain - it's revolutionary. When you let yourself die, there is suddenly one day: New Life. You are Different. New. And no matter how hard you try, you simply cannot fit into your old life anymore."
~Glennon Doyle
"You can be shattered and then you can put yourself back together piece by piece. But what can happen over time is this: You wake up one day and realize that you have put yourself back together completely differently. That you are whole, finally, and strong - but you are now a different shape, a different size. This sort of change- the change that occurs when you sit inside your own pain - it's revolutionary. When you let yourself die, there is suddenly one day: New Life. You are Different. New. And no matter how hard you try, you simply cannot fit into your old life anymore."
~Glennon Doyle
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Join Date: May 2018
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I guess this is how we evolve. It's precisely why alcohics DON'T. It's funny. I had a chat with a family member who's doing something really, really dumb. Usually I would just offer advice and listen. Really don't like having confrontations with this person. Yesterday, I went through him for a shortcut! I actually deleted my initial response (past self), asked my self outloud what the actual fudge was I doing and then spoke from the heart, without fear.
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Originally Posted by hopeful4
"As you are shifting, you will begin to realize that you are not the same person you used to be. The things you us to tolerate have become intolerable. When you once remained quiet, you are now speaking your truth. Where you once battled and argued, you are now choosing to remain silent.
You are beginning to understand the value of your voice and there are some situations that no longer deserve your time, energy, and focus."
This has recently happened to me. My whole outlook on my AH and life in general has shifted.
I am finding now the shift has happened, I cannot go back. My behaviours have changed a lot on the back on these attitude changes.
I have heard many times in 12 step programs that this big change to your outlook and personality happens as we work our recovery.
It feels like a miracle to me.
Now looking back, it seems strange why I saw things the old way that I did. At the time I did though and now I know better.
Onwards.
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Originally Posted by Milano58
I guess this is how we evolve. It's precisely why alcohics DON'T. It's funny. I had a chat with a family member who's doing something really, really dumb. Usually I would just offer advice and listen. Really don't like having confrontations with this person. Yesterday, I went through him for a shortcut! I actually deleted my initial response (past self), asked my self outloud what the actual fudge was I doing and then spoke from the heart, without fear.
This has been happening to me too. Someone would tell me some old claptrap about some dumb rubbish they were doing and the old me would go zooming in to give all manner of advice and trying rescue them!!
Now I just think "oh fudge off" and go about my own business and let them do their own fudging up of their life! Their issue, not mine!
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It's amazing when it happens isn't it?
I was recently at a sporting event for my child. My XAH normally does not sit near me, but this time he sat in our group, but not beside me. It was pretty clear he had been drinking, big mouthed, etc. Nothing too terrible, but uncomfortable for those immediately around him, which I was not right beside him.
Guess what? This did not cause me one ounce of anxiety. I acted and did the same things I always would do, it was totally fine. I was unaffected in any way, shape or form. I interacted with my friends around me and just had a great time. Best thing was, my children really acted the same. They could not have cared less. And best part...kid won the game!!!
From a PTSD diagnosis and him causing me major anxiety just walking into a room to this, wow. Major breakthrough, and major SHIFT!
For anyone thinking this cannot happen to you, you are wrong. Put in the work, give it some time, and it can and will happen with the right self care.
Big hugs friends!
I was recently at a sporting event for my child. My XAH normally does not sit near me, but this time he sat in our group, but not beside me. It was pretty clear he had been drinking, big mouthed, etc. Nothing too terrible, but uncomfortable for those immediately around him, which I was not right beside him.
Guess what? This did not cause me one ounce of anxiety. I acted and did the same things I always would do, it was totally fine. I was unaffected in any way, shape or form. I interacted with my friends around me and just had a great time. Best thing was, my children really acted the same. They could not have cared less. And best part...kid won the game!!!
From a PTSD diagnosis and him causing me major anxiety just walking into a room to this, wow. Major breakthrough, and major SHIFT!
For anyone thinking this cannot happen to you, you are wrong. Put in the work, give it some time, and it can and will happen with the right self care.
Big hugs friends!
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: uk
Posts: 2,428
Originally Posted by hopeful4
It's amazing when it happens isn't it?
I was recently at a sporting event for my child. My XAH normally does not sit near me, but this time he sat in our group, but not beside me. It was pretty clear he had been drinking, big mouthed, etc. Nothing too terrible, but uncomfortable for those immediately around him, which I was not right beside him.
Guess what? This did not cause me one ounce of anxiety. I acted and did the same things I always would do, it was totally fine. I was unaffected in any way, shape or form. I interacted with my friends around me and just had a great time. Best thing was, my children really acted the same. They could not have cared less. And best part...kid won the game!!!
From a PTSD diagnosis and him causing me major anxiety just walking into a room to this, wow. Major breakthrough, and major SHIFT!
For anyone thinking this cannot happen to you, you are wrong. Put in the work, give it some time, and it can and will happen with the right self care.
Big hugs friends!
I was recently at a sporting event for my child. My XAH normally does not sit near me, but this time he sat in our group, but not beside me. It was pretty clear he had been drinking, big mouthed, etc. Nothing too terrible, but uncomfortable for those immediately around him, which I was not right beside him.
Guess what? This did not cause me one ounce of anxiety. I acted and did the same things I always would do, it was totally fine. I was unaffected in any way, shape or form. I interacted with my friends around me and just had a great time. Best thing was, my children really acted the same. They could not have cared less. And best part...kid won the game!!!
From a PTSD diagnosis and him causing me major anxiety just walking into a room to this, wow. Major breakthrough, and major SHIFT!
For anyone thinking this cannot happen to you, you are wrong. Put in the work, give it some time, and it can and will happen with the right self care.
Big hugs friends!
I had it happen with alcohol too! I worked that program and the shift happened.
Also the same happened with my eating disorder program and then lastly with my Al-anon/ACOA program.
It is incredible. Hardly feels believable. The psychic change that the Big Book speaks of. Also called spiritual awakening. Stepping outside of my old way of seeing and reacting to the world.
It can happen to us all, with work. The work is worth it.
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