Dascha

Hi everyone...

Yesterday I decided I've had enough. I've been drinking everyday all day for months now. I put the bottle down earlier in the year, then went through a stressfull period where I got injured at work. I got resentfull about the situation, and started drinking again. I'm now on workers comp and waiting for surgery to fuse the discs in my neck.

I'm angry at myself for for falling into that trap. I don't deal with my emotions very well at all. I'm in alot of pain and consequently quite a few prescription drugs. I definitely shouldn't be drinking while on meds but it is such an ingrained habit/addiction that I can't function without it.

I have brutal hangovers and feel like my whole body is falling apart. Alcohol has taken away everything good in my life and I hate it.

I read on here everyday, sometimes for hours. I've found an AA meeting close to where I live so I'm going to start going as doing it on my own isn't working. It's my birthday today and the best gift I can think of is being sober.

My last drink was yesterday, so I'm at 24hrs. I just feel really tired but hopeful. Thanks for sharing all your stories, I don't feel so alone...

Dee74

thats a great decision patterson

D

Dascha

Thank you, you do a wonderful job of helping people. I'm so thankful for this site and everyone on it.

rainbowalien

Dascha

Thank you rainbowalien

Congratulations on 5 weeks, that's amazing!!!

least

A sober life would be the best birthday gift you could give yourself.

KTB5000

I agree with least...
No better time than today!

I don't have much time either (48 hours) and sorry to hear about your injury...But, Hang in there though!

sobriiestote

Kaily

Hi Patterson

Happy Birthday and well done on your decision to stop drinking.

Sorry for the emotional and physical pain you are suffering. I understand that, I also self medicated with alcohol, it is a relentless path that soon stops working thus leading to more and more drinking.

I know you believe you can't function without alcohol but you will be able to, give it time and commitment. And your meds will work better in recovery too.

I hope you find some relief and support in AA.

Best Wishes.

Fusion

Happy Birthday Patterson 🎂. What a wonderful present to give yourself, sobriety.

tomsteve

i can relate to that,Patterson. it didnt take long for me to realize i wasnt having hangovers but withdrawls. i was further down the scale of alcoholism than i thought, but that seems to be typical for alkies- its not THAT bad!

it would be wise to get a copy of the big book if ya dont have one and read it. that way you can learn what the program of AA is about and what can occur by putting it into action.
you can read it online here:
https://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/read-...lve-traditions

Linked with permission AA World Services Inc

Sober369

Happy Birthday! It will seem hard for a little while, and then get easier, and then will get so that you are so deeply grateful that you don't have to drink. Hang in there and please let us know how it's going!

Misssy2

Happy Birthday...Everyday/Allday is a big problem...with big consequences...I KNOW...I am on 12 days sober and JUST starting to get over some of the "consequences" waking up this morning is the first morning in the 12 days I feel somewhat human.

Don't let it bring you back down...fight thru this...It IS a fight for your LIFE.

NewOne

Wrong thread sorry.

Steadwell

Can certainly relate @Patterson, I had my 60th at the first of this month. This whole month has been up and down, mostly down. It's odd because I had a completely dry August, then Labor Day, birthday, strained my back at work. Been hanging around SR but usually too ashamed to participate.

Ravel

That's the best present you could possibly dream of, keep it rolling! Happy birthday from me and good luck with your surgery!

Zebra1275

I've found an AA meeting close to where I live so I'm going to start going as doing it on my own isn't working.

This is the birthday present you give yourself. AA can dramatically change your life. Go today!

Dascha

Wow!!

Thanks for the kind words everyone...I'm waking up this morning to such positive vibes!

I will go get a copy of the big book today.. I have been to AA meetings when I was in treatment years ago...but I didn't really connect. At the time I was in alot of chaos in my marriage, ( due to my drinking) and I had zero focus.

This is a women's only meeting about a 10 minute walk from my home. I had no idea it was even there until I was looking up the schedules online.

I slept pretty well, just really sweaty and those crazy vivid nightmares.
I'm grateful for all your support, it's day 2 and I will not drink today!!!

August252015

Good job! And, I bet there is a hotline number for your area in case you either just need to talk to someone or want the most accurate info on meetings. I've found sometimes things are a bit inaccurate on some mtgs in my area.

My 40th bday was just before I was 6 mo sober and the first in a number of years I spent sober. 41, 42, and 43 each August have been even more gratitude inducing! My profile pic is of 43 and I think it captures my joy very well!

It's hard at first, in every way - you may recall from however you did it before- but you're right: going it alone is hard to do and often impossible to sustain.

Glad you are here.

ColoradoRocky

Good start.

I have no personal interest in promoting AA, it's not like I get a kickback out of the collection basket or something!!!, I just know it works.