New to forums, new to AA
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2019
Posts: 20
New to forums, new to AA
Hi, everyone,
i'm 72 days sober. dedicated to staying sober. I know this is the right path. i'm so glad i got desperate enough to go in to a meeting.
I'm not great emotionally, i'm still really struggling with all the things that made me start drinking 14 years ago as a teenager. I dont know if i've matured much since being a teenager...
I drank because i was miserable. But drinking was another, worse yet, type of horrible. I couldnt stop when everyone around me was done and going home. I wanted more, more, more, until was so messed up, i was barely alive for the 24-48 hours after that. Depression, suffering, pain. bad decisions, disappointing myself and others.
My shame was so intense at the beginning of this journey. now it's a lot more like I'm proud of myself instead of ashamed. Sobriety really is a gift. i've done so many things since being sober and realized what it;s like to experience something for real, and not be experiencing it with all of my senses, my intellect, all of that dulled by the effects of alcohol. i thought being drunk was the most fun but it became like i had a sickness. Like i just compulsively just drank and tipped back the glass like i had no choice, i didnt really want to be doing that. I only thought i wanted that first drink, not realizing that the first drink almost always led to a dozen more.
Alcohol overpowered me. i finally realized it. I feel very lucky to have this new freedom and chance at a real life.
i'm 72 days sober. dedicated to staying sober. I know this is the right path. i'm so glad i got desperate enough to go in to a meeting.
I'm not great emotionally, i'm still really struggling with all the things that made me start drinking 14 years ago as a teenager. I dont know if i've matured much since being a teenager...
I drank because i was miserable. But drinking was another, worse yet, type of horrible. I couldnt stop when everyone around me was done and going home. I wanted more, more, more, until was so messed up, i was barely alive for the 24-48 hours after that. Depression, suffering, pain. bad decisions, disappointing myself and others.
My shame was so intense at the beginning of this journey. now it's a lot more like I'm proud of myself instead of ashamed. Sobriety really is a gift. i've done so many things since being sober and realized what it;s like to experience something for real, and not be experiencing it with all of my senses, my intellect, all of that dulled by the effects of alcohol. i thought being drunk was the most fun but it became like i had a sickness. Like i just compulsively just drank and tipped back the glass like i had no choice, i didnt really want to be doing that. I only thought i wanted that first drink, not realizing that the first drink almost always led to a dozen more.
Alcohol overpowered me. i finally realized it. I feel very lucky to have this new freedom and chance at a real life.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Good job! glad you are here.
Are you working the steps with a sponsor? I "officially" started that work at 97 days, having known I was committed to AA from the first meeting as I was at my final stop. You are early days, excellent as they are, and can see things like shame continue to "lift" and also be manageable when those feelings do re-emerge when they do (and they will).
Keep going and sharing with us.
Are you working the steps with a sponsor? I "officially" started that work at 97 days, having known I was committed to AA from the first meeting as I was at my final stop. You are early days, excellent as they are, and can see things like shame continue to "lift" and also be manageable when those feelings do re-emerge when they do (and they will).
Keep going and sharing with us.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 1,614
Welcome my sober friend. Congrats on your 72 days. Its cool that you getting the sober thing early in your life. God knows a lot of us here wish we would have did the same as you're doing now but hey better late than never I remember my 72nd day I am now at 148 days and I started to hear on sober recovery so again welcome keep up the good work ✌
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,504
Welcome and congrtulations on 72 days of recovery. It sounds like you're doing well.
And, yes, it's very hard to deal with what led us to alcoholism, but it's a worthwhile journey. Also, I think it's common to stop maturing and growing as a person while we are drinking.
And, yes, it's very hard to deal with what led us to alcoholism, but it's a worthwhile journey. Also, I think it's common to stop maturing and growing as a person while we are drinking.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: West Tn
Posts: 3,043
We're happy that you have discovered our forums and I am delighted that you have found AA.
I haven't had a drink since I first stepped into the room of my first AA meeting.
To say the least, I felt so bad and had made such a large mess out of my life that my sobriety got off to a very confusing start.
But I started working the 12 steps with a sponsor and began going to many, many meetings, and I began to get the picture of what a life in recovery could be.
It's been quite a blessing.
Please keep us apprised as to your efforts.
I haven't had a drink since I first stepped into the room of my first AA meeting.
To say the least, I felt so bad and had made such a large mess out of my life that my sobriety got off to a very confusing start.
But I started working the 12 steps with a sponsor and began going to many, many meetings, and I began to get the picture of what a life in recovery could be.
It's been quite a blessing.
Please keep us apprised as to your efforts.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2019
Posts: 20
Originally Posted by August252015 
Good job! glad you are here.
Are you working the steps with a sponsor? I "officially" started that work at 97 days, having known I was committed to AA from the first meeting as I was at my final stop. You are early days, excellent as they are, and can see things like shame continue to "lift" and also be manageable when those feelings do re-emerge when they do (and they will).
Keep going and sharing with us.
Are you working the steps with a sponsor? I "officially" started that work at 97 days, having known I was committed to AA from the first meeting as I was at my final stop. You are early days, excellent as they are, and can see things like shame continue to "lift" and also be manageable when those feelings do re-emerge when they do (and they will).
Keep going and sharing with us.
Yes I am working with a sponsor, currently on the 4th step, which I've started but kind of dreading doing. I think my mind is always ruminating on the resentments i feel, so it should not be hard! but writing it all down is apparently pretty therapeutic. I'm not really sure why i'm resisting it! still so thankful to be sober. Going to a pumpkin patch today and i'm not going to be obsessed with the possibility of drinking at any point, so I can freely enjoy the day and be a better person for my family. Such a great feeling. Truly feeling what's happening in the moment! <3
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2019
Posts: 20
Originally Posted by August252015
How are you today SassyAdria?
How are you doing?
Hope you have a wonderful day!!!
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