Katie1984

Honestly things have become interesting.
Now my physical addiction seems to have fallen away, it's now just down to willpower about not drinking.
But I don't feel like a drink, I don't want a drink.

I really do think that being on HRT has made me happier so I don't have that desire.

I've put on some weight since I've quit and I've drank a LOT more high sugar drinks but alcohol...just not interested.

I hope this keeps up and isn't a temporary thing because I now have free time to do things.
All I have done is replaced drinking with sleeping but that won't happen forever and it'll be nice to have an additional two hours a day to do stuff.

That's my latest update

Dee74

I hope you find thats the new normal too, Katie.
It is for me

D

least

I remember having a 'light bulb' moment one day when I realized I wasn't thinking about drinking/not drinking anymore. And I realized I had no desire to drink. It felt good to be free.

fini

Katie,
it’s easy to have “willpower” when you don’t want to drink. then none is needed, really, no?
what will you do if or when the moments come where you do want to drink?
you might want to give this some thought if you haven’t already.
relying on willpower can work for a bit, but not usually for very long, and is certainly a wearing-down way to live for any length of time.

MindfulMan

Someone could pour a shot or a glass of good wine or a beer and put it in front of me and I'd have no desire to drink it. It's not even about the "I shouldn't" or the "I can't" but more the "I don't want."

DriGuy

The first few days for me, it was all about willpower, before that it was all about willpower too, but I could never seem to muster enough to overcome a craving. At first, I pictured recovery as constantly strengthening my willpower. It was kind of surprise to realize that's not recovery at all. In recovery, you don't need willpower. Recovery is the absence of cravings, but you're still not in the clear because you still have to deal with your AV playing head games. It's not that your AV creates cravings. It just reassures you that with all the sobriety under your belt, it wouldn't hurt to have a drink. Now instead of will power, you have to play the game with your mind, rather than by the strength of your will power.

DriGuy

The first few days for me, it was all about willpower. At first, I pictured recovery as constantly strengthening my willpower. It was kind of surprise to realize that's not recovery at all. In recovery, you don't need willpower. Recovery is the absence of cravings. But you still have to resolve to ignore you AV when it starts playing head games.

ReadyAtLast

I don't think recovery is the absence of cravings. Its learning how to recognize deal with and not act upon them. Successfully

DriGuy

I don't doubt you, but it was not my experience, except for the first week of abstinence. But that first week for me was more like an extension of the last days of my drinking, except that I had the support of an AA group to ride through the cravings. After that, cravings were slight enough to shrug off, and absent by two weeks. By AA's criteria, I'm still in recovery, so that makes 1 week of cravings and 24 years and some months without them. For me recovery doesn't include the recognition of cravings or any action to avoid them. They are long gone.

However, I almost included in that first post the caveat that it may not be the same for everyone. I didn't include it because I assume that's understood. Dealing with our alcoholism is different for everyone in methodology, philosophy, and experience.

Katie1984

This a million times over!

What works for me may not work for you and what works for you may not work for me.
All that matters is that it does work

Dee74

The problem might be that cravings is not an exact term.

For some it means physical cravings, and for some mental thoughts.

For others it means 'wouldn't it be nice' daydreams, and for other still a mix of some or all of those....

which is why I tell people it's not whether or not we crave that's the measure of our recovery, but what we do in response to those cravings.

I haven't a struggle in a while - a few years back I was in dreadful ongoing pain and I had a few 3am declarations of 'I'm buying booze tomorrow'...but the dawn always gave me back my sanity

vive la différence

D

August252015

There's so much more to do out there- and an active recovery program gets us out of bed and way more. My experience, for sure.

Willpower and waiting on things to get better definitely weren't enough for me.

Abraham

Exactly. we all look and think about things differently. I agree with most statements here but when reading them, it all is explaining willpower to me. We all look and think about the definition of a word differently also. For me personally, its all about will power and everything else falls into place. Sure there are alot of other changes and plans, and friends, that come along, but without the will power I would have never even quit. And I would drink today without any will power even though I dont get any cravings. As evident in this thread, for some will power is hard and can wear you down if you practice in, for others its easy to use when needed and forget about when not needed.

As you can see, you will get lots of different techniques and options on how to quit. Alot of the time we are all talking about the same thing just explaining it differently using different words. Pick and choose between what works for you and keep the rest in your toolbox for when you need it. Theres more than one way to quell and addict. Best of luck to you with that.

I know I would not drink if you put one in front of me.

"Dealing with our alcoholism is different for everyone in methodology, philosophy, and experience." Driguy

DriGuy

Exactly. It's even occurred to me that when talking about cravings to another, I don't know if we are thinking about the same thing or not. At best, the word "craving" is an approximation for an experience that may be entirely different for another person. However, it's close enough to make a point about the appropriate response.

sortofhomecomin

I never had any willpower and still don't! That's why I needed rehab and still need AA. Fortunately I have no cravings for booze at all.

Abraham

It does have an exact definition though. This definition is always what I think of when I hear the word craving. I'm not sure what I have are cravings because I would not consider them powerful. I occasionally have a desire for some alcohol but usually not a powerful desire.

crav·ing
/ˈkrāviNG/

noun

a powerful desire for something.

synonyms: longing, yearning, hankering, hunger, hungering, thirst, pining, desire, want, wish, fancy, urge, need, appetite, greed, lust, ache, burning, addiction, aspiration, aim, goal;

DriGuy

Your dictionary definition is the one I always have in mind. In a book I am currently reading, the author explains there are two types of alcoholic cravings: psychological and physiological. Psychological are obsessive thoughts. Physiological are actual physical symptoms. Each responds to a specific therapy. A person may experience just one type or both. And of course how deeply entrenched a person is in craving varies from one person to the next.

My cravings, other than mild shakes, were psychological obsessions. All my cravings for alcohol are gone. I believe they could be reawakened if I started drinking again, but I don't know that from personal experience. I have no desire to test those waters because I have no reason to do it.

After my cravings left, I did experience something people may consider cravings, although I didn't see them as such. Occasionally, I would have a thought that I could have a drink, but that's NOT what I call craving, it's just nonsense bubbling up from my subconscious. This is not to say I didn't sense that thought as dangerous. One of those actually scared me one time. They may be more dangerous than an actual craving, depending on a person's psychological state.

WhoDeyPI

Good for you! I'm the same way. I no longer want to drink.

Could I drink? Yes.
Do I have money to drink? Yes.
Do I have time to drink? Yes.
Could I drink with no one knowing? Yes, I live alone.

All that said, I have no interest in drinking.

Kdon853

As I have said before for the first 4 months I wanted to drink everyday , sometimes the thought was in my head all day. Was it physical, mental , social craving probably all of them . I did not know how to function without alcohol in my life. I just kept myself very busy . AA meetings everyday. Exercise etc. then one day I woke up and didn’t want to drink. This is my lot in life and it couldn’t be better. God , AA , willpower who knows. I just haven’t felt at ease in a long time maybe this is the first time. I’m riding it