Peculiar mind of active alcoholic

Old 06-27-2019, 12:27 PM
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Peculiar mind of active alcoholic

Has anybody experienced the complete secular thinking of their alcoholic?

Our child has finally been diagnosed with a condition.. Months of blood tests, months and months of specialist visits. Me EXHA has really tried to downplay our sons condition. (again I thought my EXAH was in recovery so was concerned by his flippancy but not too bothered).
I emailed him the specialist diagnosis and his proposed medical plan (it's intensive). I got no response by email, text...phone call.

Today he drops of kids.. His only comment was.. Make sure KID has xx shoes for next visit.

Huh??

I guess it doesn't fit in with his reality that I'm wrong about his drinking, aggressive behaviour while drunk, our sons health concerns.

Sorry.. This probably needs to be in a thread about co-parenting with an active alcoholic. Because this just isn't normal behaviour.
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Old 06-28-2019, 04:18 PM
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I have experienced similar things. My AH was not as concerned as I was about our son's needing help with some things. He likes to say "it's not that big a deal"; I almost think he knows I will "nerd out" and try to find out all I can, maybe thinking I have it covered. I'm not sure. I remember during the toddler years and having to explain several times why asthma medication needed to be given nightly.
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Old 06-28-2019, 04:53 PM
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IMHO - I don't think it's about "not caring". I think it's so stressful that the only thing addicts/alcoholics can do is stick their collective heads in the sand and pretend it's not happening.

My sister left me to tell her children that our father, their grandfather had cancer. She didn't tell them for weeks, but they figured it out on their own. When I found out what was happening you could have peeled me off the ceiling (it was unclear when my sister's ex found out). One of them actually started crying herself to sleep in the middle of the night because she was so stressed out about it. The "funny" thing about it was that he had a type of cancer that was highly curable, so when I told them what was happening they were actually relieved.

It was so unnecessary. It's frankly just easier, not to mention more responsible, not to expect anything from my sister at all. I won't make the same mistake again.
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Old 06-28-2019, 06:59 PM
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Originally Posted by clarity888 View Post
I have experienced similar things. My AH was not as concerned as I was about our son's needing help with some things. He likes to say "it's not that big a deal"; I almost think he knows I will "nerd out" and try to find out all I can, maybe thinking I have it covered. I'm not sure. I remember during the toddler years and having to explain several times why asthma medication needed to be given nightly.
Ye, I just find it really inconsistent. He's completely dropped off all texts in the last month. I used to get weekly updates about our sons condition from him, which was handy as I needed to keep a record for the paediatrician. He's down played our sons issue, which is gonna cause problems as he wants him to play sports. I think it's a combination of my EXAH spewing so many lies about me (I called cops on him and kicked him out of our home because of a drunken assault), he's been trying to downplay the assault (it could have been worse... Its not like I hit you). I think he now needs to belittle and downplay anything else I do... Like get our son tested for a bloody obvious condition. Now that the specialist has confirmed his condition EXAH just ignores.

I'm just flabbergasted.. Yet again.. By his mental flip flopping.
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