2 weeks
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Join Date: Feb 2018
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2 weeks
2 weeks. Feeling stressed and sad-unrelatedly to alcohol. Don’t feel like drinking. Felt like drinking a little yesterday but I don’t today. I want to eat a whole chocolate cake though 😭
just posting for accountability and to as always say thanks for everyone being here
just posting for accountability and to as always say thanks for everyone being here
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2 weeks is great. There's a lot of emotion to deal with in the early days, and if you're like me, you're not used to just sitting with the feelings. I'm glad you're getting through this.
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 239
Hello, Hoot! I'm happy to read an update. I'm sorry that things are challenging. Two weeks is great!!! It's a wonderful milestone for anyone, but when someone is going through so much, like you are, it shows tremendous strength and resilience to maintain sobriety.
You should be very proud of yourself! You're doing amazingly well!
You should be very proud of yourself! You're doing amazingly well!
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Join Date: Feb 2018
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Thanks guys..I almost got alcohol today. It’s my day off .
i am feeling really sad and stupid. My daughter is with my parents for the week. My husband and I are trying to reconnect. We had a fun weekend, but he doesn’t like how my parents are caregiving for her.
i has a spa gift certificate gifted to me two years ago and went in today for a facial and pedicure. The facial was relaxing but then I checked my phone...a missed call and voicemail about the car repair, and several texts from my husband flipping out about the car repair and some confusion with it. He told me to call him immediately and everything went south from there on and he kept texting me the rest of the time telling me there’s no saving us, I keep ******* up and causing him all this stress and there’s always an issue with me
well I ended up crying at the spa place (luckily no one else was there) and the poor spa owner who I was working with probably didn’t know what to do. She was very kind to me which made me cry more. I couldn’t decide if I should bail on the pedi but then I figured he’d be mad st me for going all that way and not doing it I don’t know.
i have such a a headache but I can’t drink today. I don’t want to lose that time or prove him right...spent the whole rest of the afternoon cleaning.
i am feeling really sad and stupid. My daughter is with my parents for the week. My husband and I are trying to reconnect. We had a fun weekend, but he doesn’t like how my parents are caregiving for her.
i has a spa gift certificate gifted to me two years ago and went in today for a facial and pedicure. The facial was relaxing but then I checked my phone...a missed call and voicemail about the car repair, and several texts from my husband flipping out about the car repair and some confusion with it. He told me to call him immediately and everything went south from there on and he kept texting me the rest of the time telling me there’s no saving us, I keep ******* up and causing him all this stress and there’s always an issue with me
well I ended up crying at the spa place (luckily no one else was there) and the poor spa owner who I was working with probably didn’t know what to do. She was very kind to me which made me cry more. I couldn’t decide if I should bail on the pedi but then I figured he’d be mad st me for going all that way and not doing it I don’t know.
i have such a a headache but I can’t drink today. I don’t want to lose that time or prove him right...spent the whole rest of the afternoon cleaning.
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Originally Posted by least 
Two weeks sober is great! 
Sorry your hubby is flipping out and giving you stress. 
Sorry your hubby is flipping out and giving you stress. Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,097
Congrats on 2 weeks. You're doing really well given your awful home situation. You don't deserve any of this. You are not causing your husband any stress. He is an emotional bully and is abusive, belittling and demeaning you and making you into a nervous wreck.
You're doing so well staying sober in all of this and no matter how 'bad' you were drinking you still don't deserve this abuse. Of course it takes time for people to forgive us or accept we are sober but this constant putting you down is doing no one any good. No one can make you do anything but situations like this rarely get better, only worse. I hope you can take steps to remove you and your daughter from this abusive situation.
Children learn from what they see every day. Your daughter will grow up believing it is ok for a man to abuse her, belittle her, shout at her and treat her badly. What would you say to her as an adult if her husband spoke to her like yours does to you?
You're doing so well staying sober in all of this and no matter how 'bad' you were drinking you still don't deserve this abuse. Of course it takes time for people to forgive us or accept we are sober but this constant putting you down is doing no one any good. No one can make you do anything but situations like this rarely get better, only worse. I hope you can take steps to remove you and your daughter from this abusive situation.
Children learn from what they see every day. Your daughter will grow up believing it is ok for a man to abuse her, belittle her, shout at her and treat her badly. What would you say to her as an adult if her husband spoke to her like yours does to you?
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Thanks for the support and feedback. We ended up having a very long talk last night and he admitted a lot of his faults which is rare and a start.
but now I made another mistake today
I FaceTimed my daughter this morning butnut was only for like four minutes and I forgot to tell him
our phone logs are synched and he saw and got mad at me and said I can’t pull myself together and day 1 I already disregarded what we talked about and that I act like I am more important to our daughter then him or something. He says I just play the victim
snd don’t try to change or continue to do things that I “know make him annoyed”
ive been so sad all day! I cried almost all day yesterday. My head has been in s fog and pounding all day. I’m at work and just desperately want to go home and crawl into bed. Can’t even do that when I get home bc a friend is supposed to come over tonight so have to fake and act all happy ...
i am always just really missing my daughter so that’s another reason why I feel so down I’m sure. I just feel so useless
but now I made another mistake today
I FaceTimed my daughter this morning butnut was only for like four minutes and I forgot to tell him
our phone logs are synched and he saw and got mad at me and said I can’t pull myself together and day 1 I already disregarded what we talked about and that I act like I am more important to our daughter then him or something. He says I just play the victim
snd don’t try to change or continue to do things that I “know make him annoyed”
ive been so sad all day! I cried almost all day yesterday. My head has been in s fog and pounding all day. I’m at work and just desperately want to go home and crawl into bed. Can’t even do that when I get home bc a friend is supposed to come over tonight so have to fake and act all happy ...
i am always just really missing my daughter so that’s another reason why I feel so down I’m sure. I just feel so useless
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 850
Hey Hoot,
that sounds like textbook gaslighting and emotional abuse to me. Are you close with your parents and can you bring this up with them? Have you thought about seeing a therapist for just you? You don't deserve to be belittled and guilt tripped.
Just stay sober and try to talk to a third party who knows your dynamic with your husband and who can give you solid advice. Keeping you in my thoughts. <3
that sounds like textbook gaslighting and emotional abuse to me. Are you close with your parents and can you bring this up with them? Have you thought about seeing a therapist for just you? You don't deserve to be belittled and guilt tripped.
Just stay sober and try to talk to a third party who knows your dynamic with your husband and who can give you solid advice. Keeping you in my thoughts. <3
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Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 119
Originally Posted by dpac414
Hey Hoot,
that sounds like textbook gaslighting and emotional abuse to me. Are you close with your parents and can you bring this up with them? Have you thought about seeing a therapist for just you? You don't deserve to be belittled and guilt tripped.
Just stay sober and try to talk to a third party who knows your dynamic with your husband and who can give you solid advice. Keeping you in my thoughts. <3
that sounds like textbook gaslighting and emotional abuse to me. Are you close with your parents and can you bring this up with them? Have you thought about seeing a therapist for just you? You don't deserve to be belittled and guilt tripped.
Just stay sober and try to talk to a third party who knows your dynamic with your husband and who can give you solid advice. Keeping you in my thoughts. <3
I don’t really have anyone to talk to. I have a best friend from my home state who I text regularly and tell her some things but not everything and he has caught my texts to her before and doesn’t like her because of this ...
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I know you're not here for relationship advice but this whole dynamic sounds really unhealthy to me hoot 
You are entitled to talk to and FaceTime anyone you want to.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...out-abuse.html (About Abuse)
D
You are entitled to talk to and FaceTime anyone you want to.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...out-abuse.html (About Abuse)
D
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 850
Yeah, I would really think seriously about your relationship. I can’t tell you what to do, but it doesn’t sound too healthy.
Its important you do what’s best for you and your sobriety, and you shouldn’t let anyone control who you do and don’t see.
Just my two cents.
Its important you do what’s best for you and your sobriety, and you shouldn’t let anyone control who you do and don’t see.
Just my two cents.
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