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Back to quitting

Old 06-02-2019, 12:20 PM
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Back to quitting

I've got a busy day ahead, but wanted to start posting here again.

I have binge drank too often for the last 20 years. I have wanted to stop for about 10 years. Sometimes I would stop for a couple weeks or month here and there, but it never stuck.

For the last year or 2, I haven't but much focus on it. I had been nite time binge drinking every 2 or 3 days. I really started to hate it. But every second or 3rd day would come along and I'd do it again.

Recently I have become overwhelmed by the amount of work I need to get done and falling behind. But I still drink. It made it worse.

I also realize that by drinking, I am just focusing inward on negative things, instead of outward and trying more to live. By that, I mean finding things I enjoy doing and finding things missing in my life.

So by seeing how difficult it was to take care of work challenges, I decided I just HAVE TO not drink. I went 5 days. First and second day, I didn't really feel a lot better. I had the usual anxiety and lack of energy. But 3rd ad 4th day...that was a big difference mentally and physically. I felt happier, less anxious and more confident that I can handle my life. I have also been eating better and exercising.

But on day 5 I was very tired due to getting up really early to do a favor. That was a mistake because I ended drinking. I know I need to take care of myself to help my willpower.

This experiment has shown me that not drinking is much better and drinking was actually giving me my bulk of problems. It's like a handicap. So this gives me motivation and hope. I'm on day 3 again and am at the feeling better point. I will be pacing myself and making sure I get enough sleep. I know that it's ok to cut down work time and rest sometimes because if I decide to stress myself then I will drink and the next day will be far less productive and cause a lot of anxiety. So better to put not drinking as a priority and the rest will work out much better.
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Old 06-02-2019, 01:23 PM
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Originally Posted by Snowball99 View Post
This experiment has shown me that not drinking is much better and drinking was actually giving me my bulk of problems. It's like a handicap. So this gives me motivation and hope. I'm on day 3 again and am at the feeling better point. I will be pacing myself and making sure I get enough sleep. I know that it's ok to cut down work time and rest sometimes because if I decide to stress myself then I will drink and the next day will be far less productive and cause a lot of anxiety. So better to put not drinking as a priority and the rest will work out much better.
Hi Snowball,

I was a functional alcoholic for many years. Some people hate the term but I believe it adequately conveys what it's supposed to. I managed to hold a job, barely keep my finances in order enough to continue drinking, and was putting up the outward façade as best as I could.

After two years of sobriety and putting in the hard work of fixing myself I have made a pleasant discovery. Life is easy. Just think about how much energy and effort is expended trying to hold your life together while being a heavy alcoholic. Remove drinking from the equation, put some genuine effort into recovery and it is like finding the cheat code to life.

Make no mistake about it, early sobriety is tough. But after putting in the time and effort it was amazing to me how quickly and how easily my problems went away.
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Old 06-02-2019, 02:25 PM
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Wow, your story sounds just like mine.
I tried to quit for ten years, too. I was functional enough to work once in awhile, to pay the rent and bills. Didn't have to worry too much about food as I seldom ate while on another binge.
It did take me a full ten years to quit and it took help. I used AA. I don't know if you're open tot that or not, but it saved my life.

It's been over ten years now since I've had a drink of alcohol.
You can do it, too. Put as much energy as you do into acquiring, drinking and recovering from alcohol and you almost can't go wrong.
Best to you. And sobriety is possible with an open mind and wanting to quit more than you want to drink.
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Old 06-02-2019, 02:26 PM
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I had to make sobriety the most important thing in my life. If things that I was doing made me want to drink I just didn't do them. I changed almost everything. The places I went, the people I associated with. I don't see my children very much. They all drink and they don't want to go somewhere that they would feel uncomfortable drinking. I am glad. I totally understand. I would have done the same thing not so long ago. You are going to have many ups and downs, just don't get too up and SR is a good place to help with the down times. So many caring compassionate people here to help. Best wishes for you on your journey!
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Old 06-02-2019, 02:34 PM
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Yes it sounds like you haven't given sobriety enough of a chance to experience the benefits. IMO you need a good 3 months to really see what it's all about.
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Old 06-02-2019, 03:54 PM
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Welcome back Snowball

I'm not a big fan of winging it in recovery - I think having a definite plan - strategies to deal with cravings and tiredness and bad days and all the other things that we use as excuses to drink, is a great idea?

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html (What exactly is a recovery plan?)

D
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Old 06-02-2019, 05:25 PM
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Originally Posted by WeThinkNot View Post
Hi Snowball,

I was a functional alcoholic for many years. Some people hate the term but I believe it adequately conveys what it's supposed to. I managed to hold a job, barely keep my finances in order enough to continue drinking, and was putting up the outward façade as best as I could.

After two years of sobriety and putting in the hard work of fixing myself I have made a pleasant discovery. Life is easy. Just think about how much energy and effort is expended trying to hold your life together while being a heavy alcoholic. Remove drinking from the equation, put some genuine effort into recovery and it is like finding the cheat code to life.

Make no mistake about it, early sobriety is tough. But after putting in the time and effort it was amazing to me how quickly and how easily my problems went away.
Hi WeThinkNot,

Thanks for your perspective. I had some sort of idea that what you said would be true for me. Heavy drinking 3 times a week would probably give similar results as having a cold that never goes away.

My life while drinking has been really half assed. I make it through, have a place to live and a car, but I feel like I have to try really hard to pull that off while drinking. I have actually accomplished some things I am proud of, but it's sad to think about how I could have done a lot better in a few areas of my life. I look forward to being able to do better and having that be easier.
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Old 06-02-2019, 05:40 PM
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I completely agree with WeThinkNot. I was an every 3rd day binge drinker myself. That life was SO exhausting. It’s way better now. I tried to quit and/or moderate by myself. It wasn’t until I reached out for help that I was able to make sobriety work.
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Old 06-02-2019, 05:41 PM
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Originally Posted by Ghostlight1 View Post
Wow, your story sounds just like mine.
I tried to quit for ten years, too. I was functional enough to work once in awhile, to pay the rent and bills. Didn't have to worry too much about food as I seldom ate while on another binge.
It did take me a full ten years to quit and it took help. I used AA. I don't know if you're open tot that or not, but it saved my life.

It's been over ten years now since I've had a drink of alcohol.
You can do it, too. Put as much energy as you do into acquiring, drinking and recovering from alcohol and you almost can't go wrong.
Best to you. And sobriety is possible with an open mind and wanting to quit more than you want to drink.
Thanks for the encouragement. Congratulations on 10 years. I can't even imagine how that would be.
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Old 06-02-2019, 06:28 PM
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Yes its so hard to juggle life....But if "we" don't...we won't be living very long for real.

You and your sobriety....ME AND MY SOBRIETY have to be #1.....no favors, no late nights, no skipping meals, no getting in arguments....take it slow and easy and get some days behind you to build your strength....

Input some form of recovery in everyday...AA, or reading, or therapy, or meditation.....and put you and that first!
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