ulfr

am on day 4 for drinking and 1 day from drugs
am going to aa again
my mental health has been bad my minster told me to grow up stop acting like a child and be in control of my borderline personalty disorder and learn about it make steps to control it do my mindfulness
i am at the start again but a new day tomorrow a day at a time

Hawkeye13

Good to see you back--it is a new day and you can do it--

Dee74

I'm sorry you've been struggling River but I'm glad you're back

D

Ghostlight1

Glad you're back, but sorry you have a reason to be.
Yep, every day gives us another chance. I hope you take advantage of your fresh start.
Best to you.

Misssy2

Your minister obviously knows nothing about addiction or mental illness...this has NOTHING to do with "growing up" or "being a child"....addiction is a disease as well as mental illness.

I'm proud of you for going back to AA...I am also "back again" on Day 3....its painful going thru detox I never want to feel this way again.

Anna

River, I'm sorry your minister spoke to you like that.

It's good to know you're back and on Day 4!

ReadyAtLast

Welcome back.

What Missy said is spot on. Maybe see a professional who does understand addiction and stay with us here who also understand.

ulfr

. My minster knows me well he says about me being a childish i do act childish i want to be a small child as it makes me feel safe it's to do with me being abused as a child i regress into a 5 year old sometime its ok to but not all of the time and i need help but i have to wait nhs in Scotland am doing the right thing going to aa and being responsible for myself

Erratic

i hear u on this river i have the same as u. i have started to take more responsibility for myself also. Not easy i know but with the right support i do hope u get there x

Dee74

Yeah I might not have phrased it like your minister did but taking responsibility for myself was a key part of my recovery too

all the very best of support and good wishes to the both of you

D

PhoenixJ

my dad was a priest

good for comfort and support...guidance yes, but not for advice on mental health- IMO.

Support to you

DriGuy

Keep trying. I made plenty of restarts before I eventually got myself going.

BrianK

I notice a pattern with my own negative self-talk. I'll try to punish myself after a binge by telling myself things like "I need to grow up!" The problem is after the pain fades and I've beaten myself up, I'm alone and empty, and feel like I "paid my dues" behaving myself for a couple days or weeks, and "don't I deserve to have some fun in life, too?" and the next binge begins. Now I'm trying to come at things from the positive side by remembering that, when I'm sober and actively trying to see the good in life, I can offer a lot to others and enjoy life a lot, and others can do the same for me.