Hollydoll

Dee74

For me getting sober was one of the hardest period of my life.
I think most people find it incredibly hard.

The difference between those who 'make it and those who continue to struggle seems to be in the amount of effort they put out and the list of things they're willing to change or to try.

Whenever I struggled, I'd come on here and post - sometimes I wouldn't even post about my own stuff but I'd post to someone else and that would galvanise me to find the strength to go on and stay sober.

If SR is your main support and you're not posting here when you're struggling but instead posting a few days later when you get some time back, thats something I'd definitely look at Holllydoll.

If you're not asking for help advice and support when you need it, why not?

D

Tetrax

I'm in my fourth week and have already found the cravings have got less and less as I'm getting used to not drinking with each passing day. Maybe just think about hitting that first milestone of a week sober and take it from there.

And four days is so good; for me at least that was the hardest bit!

Kdon853

Ghostlight1

I had cravings to drink but I did not find them impossible to resist.
I took action. I went to AA and came here. I found I did not have to quit alone.
With help, it wasn't impossible to quit.
I had enough drinking and wanted desperately to get sober. I had to not want to drink more than I wanted to drink.
I would play it through in mind what would happen if I took that first drink. That helped.
I found I wasn't defenseless against the first drink. That was huge for me. If I didn't have the first, I wouldn't have the tenth.
I also found I didn't have to do this forever. Just for today. One day I could handle.

Everyone is different in how they quit, on a personal level. But one thing in common is we don't drink today.
Try and resist the cravings today. If you can do that, do the same thing tomorrow.
I was a chronic relapser for twenty years of trying to cut down or quit.
That was ten years ago that I have been sober. And I still do it one day at a time.

mariposa

thomas11

I wanted so badly to quit for probably 2-3 years before I actually quit. It was when I finally hit my "limit" that I knew I wanted a different future for myself. To continue drinking the way I drank was a slow death. You can do this. I believe if you want it bad enough, it will come to you.

Kaily

Hi Holly

Everyone's struggles are different in many ways.

I joined here at the end of 2014 and only now have 6 months sober. Like you I would try and try but the cravings kept getting beating me plus I was drinking away withdrawals. I was rarely getting even a day without drinking. It was getting worse and worse. I was drinking a bottle of vodka a day ~ often more.

This time the cravings have been just as bad, the early days were horrendous. I would pace the house. If I went out to walk the dog I wouldn't take any money with me. Absolutely everything had to be thought about and planned. I ate sweets, chocolate anything I wanted just to get through.

After about a week I started walking for hours and hours to exhaust myself. I would come home exhausted, eat dinner go to bed. I was tunnel visioned on recovery. Stubbornness set in, I wanted to beat it!

The cravings are still there, I don't think they will ever totally go. Sometimes worse than others, but I am getting there.

Was it easy? No!

Never give up trying Holly.

ChloeBitsy

I read that the first few weeks are the hardest and if you keep giving up then you keep having to repeat the hard part over and over without ever getting to the really good stuff. I really wanted to see what that good stuff was like.
At day 46 I can say it def gets easier and the benefits are greater with every passed hurdle. Don’t go back to the beginning- you’ll just be here again 3 days later. “insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results.”
Try reading/listening to some books/podcasts on the subject. It will keep you motivated and remind you why your doing what your doing, that your not alone and what your experiencing is the same for us all. Good luck and keep posting!

lessgravity

I read it here so many times before I experienced it myself, but it really does get easier. However I do agree with Dee and everyone else, it does require a lot of work and some pain, readjustment and really just facing life on l8fe's terms for the first time maybe in your life. Once you push through and find ways to say sober. Staying sober gets so much easier. And then life is better in each and every single way. Keep pushing.

Anna

I found the cravings overwhelming at first, but I also found that each time you resist a craving, it gets a bit easier the next time.

kinzoku

I think all of us have felt that way.

Sending you support and positive vibes.

Its hard to give advice other than one day at at ime until you have some really solid time under your belt and cant start strategizing and thinking deeper.

Tried meetings?

Happyvale

Hi Holly:
As others have noted - sobriety may look or feel a little differently for some but it is the desire to stop turning to the drink that is the common thread. I have a nicotine or cigarette issue along with the unhealthy booze habit. Not to say I have not or would not have alcohol cravings, I think it is my physical dependency on nicotine that gives me a better or stronger insight into addiction. A few years back I had quit smoking on the patch. I think I had been quit for a number of weeks but was still wearing the patch. I had a physical job at the time and unbeknownst to me the patch had slipped and fell off. I was driving home from my shift and what felt like completely out of nowhere, I had an overwhelming craving for a cigarette. My nicotine AV was ferocious and telling me to pull over to a store RFN to buy cigarettes. It was the oddest experience - as if my brain had been completely hijacked and I was not prepared nor did I initially understand what was going on. The moment hit me... am I not wearing my patch??? Sure enough I discovered it was not where I'd placed it. I was able to exhale and gain a bit of understanding...and I made it home where I had more patches.

Physical dependence is a whole other beast in my eyes. It's taken a lot of years but I've come to realize that I am probably more of a problem or habitual drinker than a physically dependent one. Emotional or habitual dependency is still a tricky beast with still the ability to devastate and consume a life - but that extra layer of ferociousness in a craving might be absent.

I definitely still possess an AV....but I have an inkling its urgency or desperateness might not be as strong as some. In saying all that - I should add that I think I was starting to fear the strengthening of that AV just before I put down. The notion of "I need a drink" was starting to pop up more and more frequently.... earlier in the day or as an answer in situations it had never occurred to me before.

My booze AV has popped up when I have been sober before....sometimes a few months down the road and always sort of completely out of nowhere. I remember one time when serving alcohol as a food and beverage server - I was simply walking by a tray of drinks awaiting pick up and something seemingly random and disembodied screamed "pick up that drink...grab it...knock it down...c'mon..do it do it do do it'. I know its not funny but it would strike me as such at the time. My rationale interior would be like "WTF...where is that coming from??"

Addiction can definitely "hijack the brain"....and the ferocity of your cravings should not be something you should measure against what appears to be a milder beast in another.

Whether it whispers or it screams - it can still rob you of sobriety in an instant.

Lots of good advice and support and folks here who know exactly the struggle you are going through.

sugarbear1

I had a really hard time for years. Then I realized that I had to change my mind set. Instead of thinking in this manner (like you), I changed my thinking by realizing that my alcoholism wanted me dead and was going to try to sabotage all recovery efforts until I surrendered and realized I can't drink safely, so I will do what it takes NOT to drink,

It's worked for me for over 5 years now. Maybe it can help you

PhoenixJ

keep posting
meetings help

Hollydoll