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Old 04-20-2019, 11:09 AM
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I posted here not too long ago stating I wanted to find sobriety. The truth is I wasn't ready. I started drinking again only two days after but this time thought I could curb my need to drink with smoking cannabis. I used to smoke a lot when I was younger and haven't smoked it regularly for about 15 years. I had a bad experience with it the first night I smoked it and after that tried again in smaller doses which seemed to work. I cut back on my drinking a bit but it started slowly creeping up. This has been going on for the past two weeks. Friday night I was out with a friend, we both smoked a bit of weed then started drinking. We met some guys out who asked if we wanted some cocaine. I ended up having a fair amount. It was a late night but we both felt fine. The next day we had a couple of drinks and went to sit under a tree outside our hotel to smoke a bit of weed. I loaded up quite a lot into a vapouriser and inhaled very deeply and held the smoke in. After I exhaled I had a coughing fit for about a minute. After that stopped something hit me. I knew something was very wrong. I didn't know where I was and my mind couldn't function properly. My friend walked me back to our room. My heart rate went through the roof and I felt like I was losing my mind. My chest got extremely tight and painful. I collapsed and my friend called an ambulance. As he was calling my arms and face went completely numb and I couldn't talk. I started to spasm then blacked out. I felt my mind leave my body and felt like I was dying. I've never been so scared in my life. Everything slipped away and I travelled down a long dark tunnel with a light at the end. The next thing I knew I was in a bright white room, like a chamber and I was being spoken to. I'm not going to go into the details of what happened as it is very personal but suffice to say I begged for another opportunity at life and made promises. Promises I know I can't afford to break. As I came to my friend was holding my hand laying with me telling me an ambulance was coming. He was very emotional snd I felt bad he had to experience what was happening. I was slurring and crying out. My legs and arms were twitching. I managed to speak to him to tell him to tell my Dad I was sorry and that I loved him and my ex partner. I kept fading in and out. The paramedics turned up and tried to lift me but I couldn't move. I was given an ECG then put into an ambulance and taken to hospital. I was shivering violently the whole way and losing my mind. I slipped under again I think as I remember two vivid hallucinations where I was communicating with entities. At hospital I had another ECG, blood pressure and blood tests. All results came back okay aside from one anomally I need to get looked at further. After 6 hours I slowly started to get a bit of focus back and my friend took me back to the hotel. I'm still in shock and can't quite get my thoughts together or process what happened. All I know is what happened was a hard lesson that I unfortunately needed. There is no going back for me now. I'm here to be sober in every respect and I'm going to do anything and everything to make that happen. I'm going to be the best person I can be. I feel my ego has been destroyed and it's left a very humble shell of a man. It's time to rebuild myself. Thank you for reading and thank you for any support.
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Old 04-20-2019, 11:17 AM
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Man that made me shiver, I've had an unhealthy relationship with drink an drugs as well, I'm back again, I've now completed my first week, I wish you love and strength my friend. Keep going, keep posting. The love support you will get from here will be priceless. Good luck ���� and you got my support ��
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Old 04-20-2019, 11:42 AM
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Total abstinence from alcohol and drugs is the only way for me. I’m an alcoholic and a grateful one at that; it’s given me a wonderful way of life and beautiful peace of mind most of the time.

Im grateful I don’t put myself through those experiences now. The sober life as a recovered alcoholic is a wonderful life and freely available for those that honestly want it.
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Old 04-20-2019, 12:57 PM
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I'm so glad you're alright. That must have been an awful experience.
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Old 04-20-2019, 01:28 PM
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THC is a hallucinogen. Adding it on top of cocaine (an upper) and alcohol (a depressant) is not only dangerous, but it could easily make you not know what is going on.

You can do this. Personally, I find avoiding anything stronger than caffeine works great for my sanity and well-being.
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Old 04-20-2019, 01:28 PM
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You’ve been given another chance which many don’t get, I wish you luck, you can do this
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Old 04-20-2019, 02:22 PM
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Hope this can indeed be your "last" last time.
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Old 04-20-2019, 02:34 PM
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That is so scary! but maybe it might be worth it if that is what took for sobriety for the rest of your life. Sobriety is a game changer and a lifesaver.
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Old 04-20-2019, 03:58 PM
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Hi Bodhi,

This experience could be the best thing that's ever happened to you. My own journey had a couple of false starts and relapses. Although I was given knowledge and tools to live a better life my laziness and ego got in the way. "What's with these people being so preachy, I got this all figured out". Yeah right.

The hell on earth that was the last withdrawal I went through was a real eye opener for me. After surviving that (and I don't want to know how close I came to not surviving) I realized I had two choices: WORK a plan of recovery or sit around twiddling my thumbs until I relapsed and died.

I'm proud to say that I've been blessed with a happiness greater than anything I could have imagined. If you use this event as the catalyst for your own recovery I am absolutely confident you will know this happiness as well.

Thank you for your story. It has further strengthened my resolve never to touch alcohol or drugs again.
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Old 04-20-2019, 04:08 PM
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I'm glad you're OK after that.

I really hope you can use this experience to change stay sober and clean and make a recovery action plan for good, Bodhi

D
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Old 04-22-2019, 04:19 AM
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Thanks for the support everyone. I do think it will end up being the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm feeling clarity again. Still humbled but in a good way.
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Old 04-22-2019, 04:40 AM
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A red flag indeed, well done on taking responsibility

My fatal journey to sobriety was hell and I would not wish for any one to go thru what I did, and the lifelong legacy I now carry till the end of my days

my prayers and support to you
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Old 04-22-2019, 04:55 AM
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Glad you are alive after that scare. Life sober is a gift, welcome
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