Realest

I’ve shared in most meetings as a beginner in my first year. Now that I have some time I find it difficult to share in meetings. I focus on what I’m gonna say and what I should of said ,and I want to sound good. Also I am not struggling as much so I don’t share. Does anyone else relate to having difficulty sharing after getting some time sober?

warrens

In my first year, I felt compelled to share, effusively, at every meeting. I had so much to tell you regarding how to get sober.

Perhaps because of my Buddhist background, I tend now to practice "Don't know mind," unless I have something authentic to share with the group.

I find also, that I feel less comfortable sharing at certain meetings, that I am expected to conform to the ethos of the group. Often, I see it differently, but I don't feel like sowing discord. On the other hand, there are some meetings where the "personality" allows for free expression regardless.

I no longer share unless it is authentic.

Best,

Warren

Realest

Yea I felt like I had to share my first year. Now I don’t have as much on my mind. I don’t wanna share just to share

Ken33xx

My advise with regards to sharing:

1. Make your point and keep share to 3-5 minutes. After that you lose the room.

2. If you make a gaff or two don't worry. It's unlikely anyone is going to remember.

You want to be a popular "sharer" at meetings?

Keep it short and to the point.

Realest

I want to speak honestly , I don’t wanna be popular. Thanks though

Realest

I want to speak honestly , I don’t wanna be popular. Thanks though

Dave42001

I can relate.. I don’t think I shared anything for 6 + months when I first got into AA, I was a mess but the more meetings I attended and the more I met the members before and after the meetings I felt more comfortable.. I attended a new meeting once and it went around room and I was all freaked out but I started participating..

Thanks for the post! Have a great week!

blinky17

Early on, my codependent side would sometimes cause me to predicate my share on how clever I thought I'd sound around the table. By the time I got to share, I forgot everything I wanted to say. hahaha

I find it best to just speak from my heart and be authentic, even if I can sometimes feel like a gawky teenager still.

Don't hold back on the wisdom that your year of sobriety has given you. It's good to give away what was so freely given to you.

Realest

I try to speak from my heart. Even if I am complaining it gets good feedback . One time in. Shared about how I didn’t feel like going to meetings anymore and it helped some newcomers.

CaiHong

I have never found it easy sharing,the tears well up the voice breaks , hard to get the words out, I'm not sad, I don't even understand why nor do I particularly want to understand. I really don't like displaying this emotion in public but then again I feel I owe it to myself and the group to share . It happened yesterday at a meeting and several people congratulated me on showing my vulnerability. I know I need to do this more but I do find it so uncomfortable but I do feel lighter afterwards even as I write this over breakfast before the next meeting I am feeling anxious about it.

Realest

Yea I cried when I shared once and it helped out everyone. It’s not easy for me to share with all the emotions. Thanks your posts helped me know I’m not alone with feeling this way.

Ken33xx

What I mean by popular is knowing when to stop and let someone else chime in.

As far as what one shares as long as it pertain to the topic it's all good.

DriGuy

First of all hearing people sharing their joy in recovery was always something I like listening to. Mostly, I was happy to share, and I usually had some perspective about a topic that seemed relevant. Having said that, there were times I didn't feel like sharing, often on a topic that had been beaten to death in the last few meetings, and sometimes my well was just dry. I used to wonder why my well would be dry sometimes. I dunno. I guess it's normal and I don't think it's a great cause for concern.

Tommyh

I try to keep my sharing brief, simple and to the point. I also try to send out all the encouragement I can to the newcomers.
Usually less than 2 or 3 minutes

I do have a sponsee who waits until the end of the meeting and then tries to "out share" everyone else....we`ve talked about this before.

Realest

Some people try to outshare everyone. It’s good to be less than than 2-3 meetings that’s what I aim for.

Tommyh

a lady I know said
do we want to sound good in meetings or live well?

I prefer to live well myself

Ken33xx

Me too. There was a time I thought, "Wow, these people have it all together."

Then I began to realize some members embellished what they say in meetings.

That their life outside the rooms is often as screwed as the next person.

Realest

There was a girl who did nothing but cry when she shared in the begginners meeitng. She helped me the most because of her honesty

Yea I relate to the honesty

tomsteve

good question,realest. a question im thinkin is are you carrying the message when you share? or are you lookin for the mess to share still?

Realest

I have done a little bit of both. Sometimes when I was new I shared the mess. As I got better I shared the message of working the steps and how the steps changed me.