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I just want it to end

Old 03-05-2019, 11:13 PM
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I just want it to end

I have been on and off here for years. So much of my life has changed and it's not for the better.

All I want to do is just stop drinking. I always thought I could be one of those who could have a few but I cant.

I didnt think it was a problem as I dont drink everyday but recentl I can't even get passed the 2 day mark without craving a drink. It needs to stop. I have had enough of it. If not for me then at least for my children and partner.

My life is hard enough without stupid alcohol in it as well.
Nobody knows I have an issue, they know I like to drink so for me to give it up is going to be like flashing lights for people. All I want to say is look I've had enough and I'm happy without it but I know they will question me.

My mum was an alcoholic and I'm looking like I am headed if not already on that path. I dont drink through the day I drink on an evening. But I dont want my children going down this path.

Please please help me I am here and I am needing support. I will be checking in several times a day to get through this.

thanks for reading x
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Old 03-05-2019, 11:24 PM
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We're all here for you ZombieGirl.

It feels horrendously complicated but the actual mechanics of not drinking are pretty simple. Do not ingest alcohol - it's the elarnign how to do tht while living our lives and still remaining happy about our choice that takes the work and needs the support.

Why not join the Class of March support thread?

D
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Old 03-05-2019, 11:26 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
We're all here for you ZombieGirl.

It feels horrendously complicated but the actual mechanics of not drinking are pretty simple. Do not ingest alcohol - it's the elarnign how to do tht while living our lives and still remaining happy about our choice that takes the work and needs the support.

Why not join the Class of March support thread?

D
I will. I used to speak to you a lot in the past d.
does this site have an app so I can just open it up for support a bit more easier then logging on all the time?
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Old 03-06-2019, 12:11 AM
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Hi ZG,
I was always the drinker in my family too. However, you will probably find apart from the odd comment that most people really don't notice or care all that much.

I see you've been a member for many years, like me. I'm still early on in sobriety after a long stint sober in 2012-2016. That was the best time for me and I aim to be back there.

You can do this. Keep in simple. Don't buy alcohol, don't have any in the house, don't go to pubs. Take each day one at a time and don't drink. Do AAA, AVRT, SMART, SR whatever it takes and what suits you. But don't drink. You can do it for you and for your kids.
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Old 03-06-2019, 12:28 AM
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I hope you give sobriety a real chance. It takes changes but it's worth the effort.
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Old 03-06-2019, 02:06 AM
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Hey zombie. I'm the same as you. Ive read this forum for years and from the UK also. Ups and downs - relate to you totally! Done a few sober stints. Felt really good. I have young children that I wish I could be better for - maybe we can both focus on them? If your feeling down drop me a line!
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Old 03-06-2019, 06:26 AM
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Welcome back!

Don’t worry about what other people think when you quit drinking. Not one person has asked me about it. lol. I am open to talk about it but no one asks so I don’t volunteer information. It is kind of funny.
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Old 03-06-2019, 06:41 AM
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If you are really ready to quit, it won't matter what other people think. Set aside that fear of being judged. You don't have to go around telling people anything you don't want to. I told pretty much everyone I knew I was having serious problems with alcohol and needed to quit. I told a few people close to me that I'm an alcoholic. As time went on I became more open about being an alcoholic, but you don't have to explain anything to anyone if you don't want to. And really - very few people really notice or care. Only those close to you will care at all, and I'm betting they will be supportive and understanding.
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Old 03-06-2019, 10:08 AM
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Originally Posted by GM28 View Post
Hey zombie. I'm the same as you. Ive read this forum for years and from the UK also. Ups and downs - relate to you totally! Done a few sober stints. Felt really good. I have young children that I wish I could be better for - maybe we can both focus on them? If your feeling down drop me a line!
thank you xxxx
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Old 03-06-2019, 11:15 AM
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I don't think anyone answered your question about the app. Yes, there is one that you can use, a lot of people do. Anything that keeps you in touch here on SR is going to be helpful to you.

The primary way to face the problem of drinking is not to do so and to plan on what you will do when your mind is telling you that it sounds like it's okay to do it. As Dee said, it's really pretty simple, it's just not easy at times. I hope that you find the right path that is going to give you sustenance for being sober, it is doable. For me it has been a combination of strategies to figure out what really works for me in various situations, but support from others has been a big part of that.

Peace.
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Old 03-06-2019, 12:56 PM
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Hi, I too was on this site for years in fact I had 1 other username I burnt through as I kept relapsing and posting rubbish it was embarrassing.

By the time I finally quit I didn’t care what anybody thought about my recovery or how boring or isolated I was, I caree about saving my life and what was left of my sanity.

Trust me life is so much better on this side.

Onwards

herc
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Old 03-06-2019, 02:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Midwest1981 View Post
Welcome back!

Don’t worry about what other people think when you quit drinking. Not one person has asked me about it. lol. I am open to talk about it but no one asks so I don’t volunteer information. It is kind of funny.
Amen to that Midwest. Most people are so wrapped up in themselves they won’t even notice. You ever gain or lose 10 pounds? Nobody cares.
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Old 03-06-2019, 03:48 PM
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Originally Posted by zombiegirl View Post
I will. I used to speak to you a lot in the past d.
does this site have an app so I can just open it up for support a bit more easier then logging on all the time?
Hi ZG

we don't have an app anymore I'm sorry.
The site owners recommend instead using the mobile view for phone users.

D
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Old 03-06-2019, 06:15 PM
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support to you ZG
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Old 03-06-2019, 06:53 PM
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Zombiegirl, you don't owe anyone an explanation as to why you are not drinking. It's a personal decision and you know, for you, it's the right one. There is nothing more you need to say, other than, 'No, thanks'.

I'm glad you're back and working on your recovery again.
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Old 03-06-2019, 08:16 PM
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Hi zombiegirl, it sounds like you’ve had enough, which is a great start! I had several relapses before finally getting sober. What it took for me was really focusing on changing myself - my thoughts, habits and behaviors. Therapy was tremendously valuable and I also continue to do yoga, meditstion, running and exercise. These have all replaced drinking behaviors and I am so much happier.

Have you thought about a long term sober plan for yourself?

I highly recommend the book, Naked Mind by Annie Grace. She also has a 30 day alcohol experience to which you can Google to find online. I love her! I also loved reading Russell Brands book, Recovery, Freedom from our addictions. There’s a lot of great reading material on addiction and recovery.

No need to explain why you aren’t drinking. People can wonder and be curious all they want. That’s none of my business. But if you have to say something, why not “I feel better without it.” I so,etimes say “it doesn’t agree with me anymore.” All true without giving away your life story.
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Old 03-06-2019, 08:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Anna View Post
Zombiegirl, you don't owe anyone an explanation as to why you are not drinking. It's a personal decision and you know, for you, it's the right one. There is nothing more you need to say, other than, 'No, thanks'.

I'm glad you're back and working on your recovery again.
What Anna said here and I will add that people get used to it. I promise. It’s like changing your hair; some people notice, some people don’t, and after awhile they forget that your hair was ever any different.
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Old 03-07-2019, 12:07 AM
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Hi Zombiegirl
There is a setting in the log in to remember you. If you choose it it just keeps you logged in. All I have to do now is come to the site and I'm already logged in.
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Old 03-07-2019, 12:09 AM
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Or at least I don't have to enter my info everytime.
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Old 03-07-2019, 02:02 AM
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Brill thanks guys.
I found a beer with 0.0% in so im hoping that will get me through any tough days as a placebo.

I picked my partner up from a pub last night and had a coke. Today will be hard as I always find day 2 the worst xxxx
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