Did go to mtg today-trying not to beat myself up
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Oakland
Posts: 561
Did go to mtg today-trying not to beat myself up
I get so all or nothing. I just got so tired. I think the naltrexone is responsible. Anyway, I didn't drink but no meeting. I don't have a sponsor right now cause I always feel like a failure and give up.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,386
You seem aware that the end results depend on your effort - I'm not going to tell you what that level of effort should be...but don't drop the ball Press.
It's only been a few days.
Keep going to meetings and find a sponsor
you're the project here - you're worth it
D
It's only been a few days.
Keep going to meetings and find a sponsor
you're the project here - you're worth it
D
quat
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,822
Maybe unpack, rethink the failure label and where it’s coming from?
From my perspective it’s the AV lying to you to get you to agree with It so It can get some more booze from you. If you ‘give up’ and drink again, that happens after You accept the (false) failure moniker, yeah? Refuse the moniker.
Rootin for ya
From my perspective it’s the AV lying to you to get you to agree with It so It can get some more booze from you. If you ‘give up’ and drink again, that happens after You accept the (false) failure moniker, yeah? Refuse the moniker.
Rootin for ya
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,037
You didn't drink today. Those are the four most important words for any of us I'm recovery. Nicely done.
Don't drink tomorrow, and add another support or two into your day: meeting, walk, posting here, journaling, reading a book about recovery....
Don't drink tomorrow, and add another support or two into your day: meeting, walk, posting here, journaling, reading a book about recovery....
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,417
If you are ambivalent about quitting, perhaps you need to really think of the harm alcohol is doing in your life and get stronger in your resolve and what you are willing to do to stay sober.
As I recall from the past, you really didn't want to quit--is this still the case honestly?
I know I didn't--but many self-evaluations later, I came to the conclusion that the cost of drinking wasn't worth what it cost me and those around me.
This has taken many relapses and quite a bit of suffering.
My personal level of resolve has moved from "I should quit, I need to quit even if I don't want to" to "I have quit and am not drinking no matter what. No matter how I feel or how much I miss the feeling of a buzz."
I don't have to emotionally "agree" with that resolution to make it true in my life. I used to think I did, but now it is enough to hold the line and as time passes, the truth is my emotional self has begun to quit its tantrum about "not getting to drink" and to embrace the peace that uncompromised sobriety has brought into my life.
Hope this helps press--
As I recall from the past, you really didn't want to quit--is this still the case honestly?
I know I didn't--but many self-evaluations later, I came to the conclusion that the cost of drinking wasn't worth what it cost me and those around me.
This has taken many relapses and quite a bit of suffering.
My personal level of resolve has moved from "I should quit, I need to quit even if I don't want to" to "I have quit and am not drinking no matter what. No matter how I feel or how much I miss the feeling of a buzz."
I don't have to emotionally "agree" with that resolution to make it true in my life. I used to think I did, but now it is enough to hold the line and as time passes, the truth is my emotional self has begun to quit its tantrum about "not getting to drink" and to embrace the peace that uncompromised sobriety has brought into my life.
Hope this helps press--
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Oakland
Posts: 561
Originally Posted by Hawkeye13 
If you are ambivalent about quitting, perhaps you need to really think of the harm alcohol is doing in your life and get stronger in your resolve and what you are willing to do to stay sober.
As I recall from the past, you really didn't want to quit--is this still the case honestly?
I know I didn't--but many self-evaluations later, I came to the conclusion that the cost of drinking wasn't worth what it cost me and those around me.
This has taken many relapses and quite a bit of suffering.
My personal level of resolve has moved from "I should quit, I need to quit even if I don't want to" to "I have quit and am not drinking no matter what. No matter how I feel or how much I miss the feeling of a buzz."
I don't have to emotionally "agree" with that resolution to make it true in my life. I used to think I did, but now it is enough to hold the line and as time passes, the truth is my emotional self has begun to quit its tantrum about "not getting to drink" and to embrace the peace that uncompromised sobriety has brought into my life.
Hope this helps press--
As I recall from the past, you really didn't want to quit--is this still the case honestly?
I know I didn't--but many self-evaluations later, I came to the conclusion that the cost of drinking wasn't worth what it cost me and those around me.
This has taken many relapses and quite a bit of suffering.
My personal level of resolve has moved from "I should quit, I need to quit even if I don't want to" to "I have quit and am not drinking no matter what. No matter how I feel or how much I miss the feeling of a buzz."
I don't have to emotionally "agree" with that resolution to make it true in my life. I used to think I did, but now it is enough to hold the line and as time passes, the truth is my emotional self has begun to quit its tantrum about "not getting to drink" and to embrace the peace that uncompromised sobriety has brought into my life.
Hope this helps press--
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Location: The Midwest
Posts: 649
Originally Posted by Pressmetilihurt
It does. I really want/need to quit. I'm in this .
You didn't drink, but this is the hardest part of it.
Get back on the horse and go to a meeting tomorrow.
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