Polaroid

.. Like "John Coffey" in the movie "The Green Mile" (played by "Michael Clarke Duncan")

I think about everything, there is so much crap going on in the world. War, murders, rapes, and other stuff.

An average of 1.7 or so people die every single second (Worldwide)

Eg. Syria, and most of the middlern Eastern countries are totally messed up.....

I wanted to be a diplomat, but that option is probably gone because of my alcoholism....

I just want peace... in every sense, all over the world, no more war, crimes or stuff like that.

Why should we hate each other so much? ;(

/rant

(Sorry but... this is a place I can get out things I hold inside, right...)

Coldfusion

I'm going pretty crazy right now too, and blame it all on the global situation. I am very sensitive to the plight of wildlife...

MantaLady

I used to get overwhelmed with the problems out there in the world too. In the last year I stopped watching the news or listening to it on the radio. I only watch positive things now.

They say you are what you eat, and in terms of feeding your mind you become what you feed it. Feed your mind negative stuff and you become negative.

The main lesson I have learned to help me cope was following a lot of buddhist principles in the fact that the way to change the world is to be what you want for others. Look after your own $hit, be a good person, live life with kindness and grace and respect. If everyone just concentrated on making themselves spiritually rich and being the best person they could be instead of trying to force everyone else to be better then I think a lot of the worlds problems would vanish. There are so many people on the internet ranting at each other pointing the finger when they are not perfect people themselves and it's total hypocricy.

Not saying you are doing that by the way lol...we all gotta get stuff off our chest! I just think that we need to stop pointing the finger and looking at what is wrong with the world and start looking inwards and concentrating on what is right with the world. xx

Polaroid

Okay, thanks for the sarcasm.

Forget it, I'll delete this thread.

doggonecarl

If that remark was sarcastic, I'm not getting it.

Those Humane Society commercials about animal abuse bother me more than what we humans inflict upon each other.

Coldfusion

My post was from the heart, and not intended to be sarcastic. I am sorry you took it that way.

lessgravity

Here's the thing though - nothing can get better, for the world, for our communities, families or anything if we sacrifice our lives to the poison.

Coldfusion

Thanks lessgravity. I need to be grateful for my sobriety.

AnvilheadII

we can make a difference, in smaller ways....when is the last time you held the door for someone, or let the mom with two kids ahead of you in line, or bought a cup of hot coffee and gave it to the homeless person outside on the street? or simply turned your face up to the sun and smiled?

Polaroid

Coldfusion;

Going crazy, and blame it all on the global situation
?

Even though you are sober? (Lucky you)...

I interpreted that as sarcasm, but okay, I'm sorry if I took it the wrong way. I don't want to get hostile against anyone. So, peace.

ScottFromWI

Change can only start with the individual. Manta lady makes a good point - the news can only frustrate you if you watch it. And if you turn it off you really won't miss much. Same thing with social media.

If you want to see real improvements in your life - change what you can. We are each faced with hundreds of choices each and every day - and how we make them is what really determines the outcome.

My life was filled with anxiety and worry for decades, so I chose to try and drink it all away. Along the way I tried to blame pretty much anything I could find for my problems - my job ( or lack of ), unfairness in my family/workplace/schooling/society, you name it. But the problem is, I can't change any of those things - the world is simply not "fair". But was able to first choose to quit drinking. Which in turn allowed me to address my anxiety and other health issues. Which in turn allowed me to improve my work and family relationships. Which then prepared me to better deal with all the other bad things that inevitably happen in life.

AKA - ranting is fine, but it won't fix anything. Only you can fix it - and it starts with putting down the bottle.

Dee74

I've done more for change in the last 12 years than I did in 30 years as a drinker or toker.

All I could do as a drinker was sink into a sense of despair at the world and everyone in it, punctuated by fits of anger that didn't help change anything either.

Gandhi said be the change you want to see in the world.
I wasn't able to do that drinking like I did because I was self serving.

D

MantaLady

That was the quote I was looking for and meant above! Thanks Dee x

entropy1964

I know what you mean. Homo Sapiens are very strange animals. Smart? Well we seem to think so...maybe when compared to an earth worm. But truly? We are kinda parasitic. We destroy everything we touch. And we've been doing it since we wiped neanderthal from the face of the earth....along with most mega fauna. And we're still destroying mega fauna. Say bye bye to the polar bear.

So why doesn't this depress me? I dunno. Beats living during the plague. My mom's side of the family came to the Americas as indentured servants so I'm guessing my plight in the mother country wasn't too great

Having a baby over 100 years ago? Scary and downright deadly....why are there so many of us? Oh yeah, parasite. Oh and the fact that women can't over power men. So there's that little fact.

I have great faith that mother earth will shake us off....and at the rate we're going probably pretty darn soon. So have faith

And as a woman, until I have the physical strength of a man, it seems I will always be considered 'weak'....and the wars, rape and killing will continue. Maybe genetic modification will allow woman to achieve physical parity. Wouldn't that change the game? Hit me? I'll kick your azz. Rape me? Don't think so. Ah a girl can dream. Wonder if there would literally be wars of the sexes? Interesting.

Sorry . I know I have a weird view. But I am very much focused on what I can control. Its the only way I can stay sane. The world has always been a brutal place. Humans have always been wickedly deadly. And cruel. And insane...on a macro and micro level.

But I can try to do good. Be kind. Be honest. Love. That's about it.

Polaroid

Today (my mother). But I just woke up from a long nap, and the first thing I did was to drink two glasses of wine....

I just hope I can get sober and actually help other people - Belive it or not, I care too much about people.

Or I'll die, as a result of alcoholism. I see it right now as a 50/50.

AnvilheadII

what steps are you willing to take to get sober? not just talk or theorize, but actual concrete steps??? you help everyone just by getting sober. yourself first and foremost. but you will have to take action.

ScottFromWI

First you have to get sober. Drinking 2 glasses of wine as soon as you wake up won't get you there.

And most importantly, you have to care about yourself before you can care about others. Again - all of this is kind of moot until you stop drinking alcohol. Seriously consider rehab or supervised detox if you aren't ablle to quit on your own.

Dee74

addictions not like other life or death situations. There's an agency there - a power that we can tap into to stop the misery and turn our lives around.

Our addicted self loves to think that it's hopeless to change, that there are dark forces arraigned against us ready to attack and inevitably drag us back into the dark - but it's just not true.

My brain was polluted by many years of destructive drinking.

The first step out of the darkness was to stop polluting my brain.

We're not passive victims - we have a say in what happens to us, Polaroid.

Let your actions start to reflect your desire for change.

D

Polaroid

Well, the first step would be to detox.... Which is dreadful... horrible. Deathly dangerous.

But they (the doctors) underestimate me and undermedicate me. I've still got a damn brain,,, cannot they eg. learn the "Ashton Manual"?

.... As I have taken benozdiazepines as well. up to 20 tablets (40mg!) of Klonopin a day, which they would not have believed. (I have an extremely high tolerance)

I'm tired of the health bureaucracy, which makes me talk to person A to B to C to D, back to B, then A again, then C.... etc

..And in my health journal I read; "Been here for the 5th time this year" (underlined)

.....Making me feel guilty, so no thanks. I know it's a horror to do it on my own, and I dread it, but I have my anti-seizure meds.

But okay, maybe get someone from the local psychatric health service to check in on me. (at least 3-4 nurses there know me very well)

I'm almost in tears... how can it get so bad.... so fast? It has just been 1.5 months...

Gettin like 50 messages from my job on my phone (as I am an adminitrator there), every day. I told my boss, I'll to come back by the 4th of March. So, that is my goal.

Totally spilling my guts here, but.... I just have get sh.... off my chest.

Dee74

You have the same talent I had for talking about everything but the things you really need to talk about man.

I get it - quitting is scary - but the longer you put it off the scarier it's gonna get.

D