What are you willing to sacrifice for your own well being ?
Do your best
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
What are you willing to sacrifice for your own well being ?
When I got sober at 31 I knew I had to give up a lot of things that were bad for me inc where I hung out who I hung out with how I thought about my day and how I would get thru it
But specifically this is for anyone struggling for those that believe they will never get sober this is for anyone reading the boards thinking is this me ?
Time for a change or More of the same ? - Were here guys we love you ok
But specifically this is for anyone struggling for those that believe they will never get sober this is for anyone reading the boards thinking is this me ?
Time for a change or More of the same ? - Were here guys we love you ok
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,174
As a middle aged person when I quit (aged 54) I did not have to sacrifice much in the way of social activities as by then I had descended into being a solo introverted drunk.
The one thing I did have to go without was the temporary escape from reality that booze gave me. It was of course an entirely illusory escape and by any objective measure my reality was not terrible, certainly not on a par with some of the images I see in the media every day. Nonetheless it was still hard to give up my pretend getaway and it was not until I understood that the price of this escape was death by daily instalments that it began to seem like no sacrifice at all once I understood that.
The one thing I did have to go without was the temporary escape from reality that booze gave me. It was of course an entirely illusory escape and by any objective measure my reality was not terrible, certainly not on a par with some of the images I see in the media every day. Nonetheless it was still hard to give up my pretend getaway and it was not until I understood that the price of this escape was death by daily instalments that it began to seem like no sacrifice at all once I understood that.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Cleveland, Ohio
Posts: 128
I was 35 when I chose to end the insanity and the progressively more frequent binge drinking. Coming up on 9 months, and don’t plan on looking back. I have lost all desire to drink because I know what will inevitably happen if I ever took another sip. At the end, alcohol took my self worth, confidence, almost my job, and time, precious time that I can’t remember and will never have again with my children again, especially when they are small. Alcohol was affecting my physical, mental and emotion health. At the end, I was sick and broken. Bottom line was, I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. The last year and a half of my drinking was the worst, and I was binging on a couple of bottles a night, several days a week. Horrible. Every sober day I am healing in every single way. My biggest sacrifice at the end was my 10 year marriage, I had to end it. I know the rule is to not make big changes in the first year sober, but my sobriety and ultimately my life depended on it. My sobriety became the most important thing in my life, at the beginning, I had to even put sobriety over my kids. Their basic needs were met and they were cherished and loved, but I had to put my focus on myself and do the work. And what I discovered was that if I really wanted a chance at a sober life for the rest of my life, my marriage had to go. It was making me miserable and I knew it wasn’t going to get better. And I was miserable enough with alcohol, I chose happiness and contentment with me and my children, and unfortunately that meant breaking ties with my husband. I was lucky to have another chance at life, and glad I got the memo at 35 to recover and enjoy the rest of my life, 100% alcohol free.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 268
Originally Posted by Canuck76 
Well, I already lost everything. Jobs, possessions, relationships. Only thing left is to be homeless.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,152
I gave up a few things when I got sober, but none of them felt like sacrifices. Rather than feeling like I was sacrificing, it was more like getting rid of what I didn't want. I was just happy to be" taking out the trash." Quitting drinking, was a great gift. I had no more expectations from sobriety than sobriety. And it delivered that and so much more because not drinking felt way better than I thought it would. I view the other problems in life as trivial, and I believe they are exactly that, especially compared to an addiction that promised nothing but misery and despair.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,339
I may be splitting the difference between loss and sacrifice when I speak of my career that is gone, a job that I was very good at and enjoyed. But the situations that would arise had I chosen to go back, and I have been offered opportunities, would be far too risky in my estimation of early recovery to take the risk. I don't think that I will have another chance at getting sober given my history, and so I subsist on what I am able to do today, and that has me living in far different circumstances than what I used to enjoy materially. I am still coming to terms with my decision, but I think it was the correct one.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2018
Posts: 177
I would v have been a regular customer in about 7 or 8 different pubs , that literally circle where I live , I d switch from pub to pub at different times of the day , Id done this all my life so I d know all the pub owners, staff , and regular s of all the pubs I drank in , so i pass the doors of these pub s daily now , I do miss the people within those walls but I d enough of that life , I was done , I was either drunk , sick or broke , and that s the way it was going to remain for life if I did t STOP . Thankfully I did and day by day intend to stay stopped. Thanks for letting me share .
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