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1 year this month

Old 02-01-2019, 04:03 PM
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1 year this month

Yep. Almost a year.

I’m currently waiting on a flight home from Seattle after spending two days with a client.

Its been my first consulting gig requiring travel since last March when I finished existing commitments then put this part of my life on hold while I dealt with the fallout from my accident in February.

Ironically it’s the same client. The cycles of life never cease to amaze me.

I definitely had AV rage on 2-3 occasions. Traveling is a big trigger for me. Dealt with them all fine, and I continue to feel confident - just have to take a second every now and then to call b.s. on AV thinking.

I opened up the site page - newcomers - and felt my breath leave me a bit at all the despair in the titles of threads. I remember well my own desperate strategy of mind a year ago.

But I do find myself wishing peeps can see things from new perspectives. The more I practice this the more convinced I become that life really is what we make it - and that starts with choosing how we want to see things...and how humble and honest we can be with ourselves.

My latest focus is self-pity. I intend to build my ability to recognize when Im looking at the world through the lens of self pity and shift my perspective into a different point of view. For example, last night I felt that familiar feeling of missing out on something because I can’t sit at the bar and drink. I saw it as self pity- looking for an excuse or a payoff by being a martyr or something. Once I saw it I shifted - im the guy who sat at the bar, ordered a cranberry and tonic, enjoyed a nice dinner and woke up this morning and absolutely crushed it with my client because my head is clear and I sat there last night thinking of a game plan for today instead of turning myself into an ego-maniacal wastoid.

Its poison. Give it up and don’t look back. Stop being a martyr. Teach yourself a few things and learn to love and cherish the little things - a quiet morning with a good cup of joe. The ability to make promises to yourself and keep them.

Put a chip on your shoulder. Walk soberly with some swag and a bit lighter step. Trust me, the problems we think we have aren’t squat compared to others - or even to how bad we can make things for ourselves if we keep feeding our overblown egos.

Preach done.

A year is a big deal for me. I’m grateful for it.

Best-

​​​​​​—B
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Old 02-01-2019, 04:10 PM
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Congrats Buckley

D
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Old 02-01-2019, 04:36 PM
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So well put, Buckley, and congratulations on your upcoming year milestone.

I can relate to what it must have felt like at the airport, I traveled many years in my addiction and spent countless hours in a numbed state. When I started to get sober I found that, like you, I was able to pass through old haunts without having to pick up again in that setting. I did relapse later, and I have chosen in my new work to avoid the isolation that travel brought to me, but I do miss the joys of doing a really great job for a client like you just accomplished. Keep it up.

Always a pleasure to read what you have to say.
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Old 02-01-2019, 04:37 PM
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Awesome Buckley! I have been following your story over the year when you have posted. I haven't been able to make it more than 30 days sober in that time. I can go 2 weeks, 3 weeks quite easily if I make it past the initial couple days. Anxiety and insomnia are my main issues. I get anxiety attacks out if nowhere and alcohol is a quick fix to calm down.

How did you deal with the stress/worry over the last year? It can be so overwhelming for me that I can't function or sleep. I have to just accept it I suppose.
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Old 02-01-2019, 04:45 PM
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What a fantastic achievement! Huge congratulations on one year!

We joined in the same month last year. I however, foolishly gave it a couple more attempts at moderation before I decided to throw in the towel, so I'm only just over 6 months sober. You're an inspiration!
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Old 02-01-2019, 04:48 PM
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Congratulations Buckley. A year is a big deal!!
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Old 02-01-2019, 05:18 PM
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Happy sober birthday! I'm on day 32 and it's very constructive to hear about your success! Awesome!
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Old 02-01-2019, 05:54 PM
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Awesome achievement, awesome effort. You are an example of what it means to take responsibility for what you are doing with your life. An inspiration. I appreciate your perspective on self-pity, plenty of that on this message board and plenty of that kept me drinking.

Keep us updated
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Old 02-01-2019, 06:02 PM
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Awesome!

Awesome post. Awesome message. Awesome achievement.

Wow, you have come a long way in that year. Followed you through the early days too and your demeanor and tone is unrecognizable. You certainly are an inspiration.
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Old 02-01-2019, 06:07 PM
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That’s so wonderful, Buckley! You sound very strong! Congrats on a big achievement!

I sometimes have the self pity thing going on too, so I get it. It’s good to be aware of it and change perspective
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Old 02-01-2019, 06:11 PM
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Great post Buckley ~ thanks!
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Old 02-01-2019, 06:12 PM
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Congrats on your upcoming year sober! And thanks for the inspiration.
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Old 02-01-2019, 06:30 PM
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A whole year! So very proud of you, Buckley.
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Old 02-01-2019, 06:57 PM
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Nice! I'm taking back full control of one of my companies starting on Mon. I also had to take a 'step back' from this place after my DUI(3yrs ago? sober 2'ish yrs now) and haven't been too hands on minus one big job 2yrs ago. Looking forward to getting back to the day-day 'grind' of it as it's a field I really do enjoy,but am well equipt to handle any AV thoughts when they occur and I know they will at first..plus I'll basically start bringing in double what i currently earn from it.

I've found a 'new way of life' can and is found with sobriety.
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Old 02-01-2019, 07:28 PM
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Congrats, and thanks for a great post, Buckley.
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Old 02-01-2019, 07:49 PM
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Congratulations Buckley!! I'm so proud of you. You're actions this year have been absolutely inspiring, and anyone who is just getting started, or struggling should read your story and know that it can and does get better.

Hope you're doing something to celebrate this amazing accomplishment!!!

❤️Delilah
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Old 02-02-2019, 12:51 AM
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Well done mate! I'm glad you've found a way of living happily without alcohol. Your post resonates with me, the benefits of sobriety are a re-awakening to the joys of the 'little things' in life and how lucky we are to have a chance to live life properly, at peace with one's self.
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Old 02-02-2019, 01:09 AM
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congrats
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Old 02-02-2019, 01:16 AM
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Congrats.
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Old 02-02-2019, 05:46 AM
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Congratulations!
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