Highercall

entropy1964

Hi HC

I'm sorry you are struggling so. I relate.

AA isn't for everyone, no doubt. I know you've posted about AA being dangerous or risky to a persons mental health. Also saying that it 'takes you out of your comfort zone'. I'm just wondering if you think you might be looking for reasons for AA to not 'be for you'? I do understand....AA takes me out of my comfort zone too. But for me, that's part of change. Change can be uncomfortable for sure.

If AA isn't for you, do you think another recovery group could be? Like Smart for example? You've mentioned drinking because of boredom too, which is extremely common. Sometimes just having a group to go to when you're bored can really help.

August252015

I'm sorry to hear you relapsed.

If not AA, what plan are you going to start to get sober this time, if that is indeed what you want?

ardy

HI HC you can do this I know it. keep trying .. It does get easier.. peomise ardy

DontRemember

It'd be a whole lot simpler if you just did one thing-not pick up that first drink. When I was caught in the 'circular thinking of drinking' I thought that one thing was next to impossible. I coudn't see how simple it really was/is and it took a lot of dedication and doing any/everything I could, to not pick up. I comitted to change my thinking.I posted/read here daily. I went to court ordered AA. I thought/'prayed' on things...things that i'd normally use as an excuse to drink at/over. As long as I didn't pick up that first drink, I knew I'd be OK...in time. That was around 2+ years ago,with one drunken "f'it" night in there somewhere. My life's not perfect,I'm not perfect,but MY alcohol use is no longer the cause of anything negative in life.

Doris47

I really hope you find something that works for you, sorry your having such a hard time. I wish you much love 🙏

AnvilheadII

HC - a few days ago you committed to posting HERE every day.....what happened to that? sobriety is a daily commitment, hourly if need be. checking in here every day, at least once, helps establish a NEW routine, a new way of doing things.

your way just isn't working. not doing anything positive for your recovery isn't working.

if not AA, then WHAT? you aren't going to find the perfect comfy solution that fits YOU perfectly. you will have to work and strive and commit in order to have a meaningful recovery. are you willing to to do whatever it takes?

Jim1958

AA is certainly not for everyone. The self disclosure is upsetting to some. I found online forums like this helpful, but you might want to consider some one-on-one counseling. Just look for therapists in your area that handle addictions. Then make an appointment and see if it will work for you better than AA. I've done both. I think the counseling was very helpful for me. It is easier to be honest with a professional therapist, at least it was for me. You know they are trained to help. Best of luck to you. One day at a time actually works too.

Highercall

Anna

I'm glad you're back, HC and I hope you find something that works for you.

Helianthus

I found that one of the biggest obstacles to my recovery was thinking that I knew better than everyone else because, you know, what I had been doing up to that point was working so well. Once I tried some of the suggestions that previously I had just dismissed as having no chance at all of keeping me sober I found they actually worked, but you have to give them a chance, approach them with an open mind and be fully engaged when you practice them.

Oh, and posting here before you drink could be the thing that makes a massive change to your sobriety.

Suzieq17

It is hard.
It is a loss.
It is change.
It is emotional.
It is physical.
It is mental.
It is spiritual.
It is what we know—all we know.
It is about the past.
It is about the present.
It is about the future.
It is scary.
It is time.

Make the change because you are totally worth it. Alcohol only brings you down. Fight back, pick yourself up and move forward. You can do this. We are here for you. Use SR to lead you in the right direction and see where the road takes you without alcohol.

Dee74

Hi HC

like others I'm wondering what you're going to do instead of AA.
Seems to me you need to do more to stop you tuning to the bottle, not less?

have you made any connections at AA - got any numbers to call - spoken up in a meeting? just curious.

D

SoberCAH

I agree with Dee, HC.

Have you gotten a sponsor, started working the 12 steps, done any AA service work for others (including people in your present shape)?

In the initial post, you say that you are going to "work hard on [your] recovery plan."

What is that recovery plan?

Do you have any reason whatsoever to think that it will work?

These are life and death decisions.

We want you to get and stay sober.

We're not trying to be hard on you.

Thanks for bringing up this topic.