Hello!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 101
Hello!
Hello everyone-
I just joined SR so I figured I'd introduce myself a little and say hello. I'm here because I am an alcoholic, have AUD, (insert whatever jargon you're comfortable with here). Been a major issue for me for the overwhelming part of the last 15 years. Daily drinker during that time, beer almost exclusively. Between 12-15 per day seven days a week. Anyway, I'm currently working with a counselor as far as my recovery goes, but have yet to make the end all be all decision to STOP DRINKING FOR GOOD. (that is obviously my goal, however). I am here to learn from your stories and experiences and, when I can, weigh in with mine as well. I'm also here to develop as many tools as possible so that I'll be as "ready as I'll ever be" when my quit date arrives (we are working to nail down that date, but for now it is looking like it will be March 15th, a date that has some significance to me personally). Anyway, it's great to be among others who know what this SOB of a struggle is like. Wishing you all nothing but the best.
I just joined SR so I figured I'd introduce myself a little and say hello. I'm here because I am an alcoholic, have AUD, (insert whatever jargon you're comfortable with here). Been a major issue for me for the overwhelming part of the last 15 years. Daily drinker during that time, beer almost exclusively. Between 12-15 per day seven days a week. Anyway, I'm currently working with a counselor as far as my recovery goes, but have yet to make the end all be all decision to STOP DRINKING FOR GOOD. (that is obviously my goal, however). I am here to learn from your stories and experiences and, when I can, weigh in with mine as well. I'm also here to develop as many tools as possible so that I'll be as "ready as I'll ever be" when my quit date arrives (we are working to nail down that date, but for now it is looking like it will be March 15th, a date that has some significance to me personally). Anyway, it's great to be among others who know what this SOB of a struggle is like. Wishing you all nothing but the best.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
I'm so glad you're here, 5329guy. When I found SR I was instantly less anxious about quitting. Knowing others understand helps so much.
I drank every day too - it was wonderful to finally be free of it. It was running my life in the end - no longer fun or relaxing - just made life miserable. You're doing a great thing.
I drank every day too - it was wonderful to finally be free of it. It was running my life in the end - no longer fun or relaxing - just made life miserable. You're doing a great thing.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 771
Welcome! Lots of great advice around here. Since you want to quit drinking, why wait until March? A lot can happen between now and then. Today would be a nice day to get started. But it’s cool that you’re working with a counselor and have a plan.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Hello and welcome.
You'll find a lot of support here.
I'm glad you've got help in quitting in real life, too.
I drank the same as you. Lots of beers. Way too many for way too long.
So I understand where you're coming from.
I didn't feel anxiety about quitting, I felt anxiety about continuing on the path I was on drinking.
Best to you and stick around.
You'll find a lot of support here.
I'm glad you've got help in quitting in real life, too.
I drank the same as you. Lots of beers. Way too many for way too long.
So I understand where you're coming from.
I didn't feel anxiety about quitting, I felt anxiety about continuing on the path I was on drinking.
Best to you and stick around.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
Welcome aboard 5329guy
I hope you'll end up quitting before March - I know its scary but I figure why wait to regain your life?
The day I quit had no significance to me before hand but its come to mean a lot, y'know?
D
I hope you'll end up quitting before March - I know its scary but I figure why wait to regain your life?
The day I quit had no significance to me before hand but its come to mean a lot, y'know?
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Right here, right now
Posts: 3,964
Hey 5329. Good to see you reaching out. This is a great place for support. I went to counseling as well and it was very helpful. The time to stop is now though! I hope you don’t wait another day. Regardless, here to support your journey!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 101
Thanks everyone for reaching out, I appreciate the support!
As to some of your points that "today is the day to quit, not tomorrow!", I understand where you are coming from in saying that. I do. All I will say is that, for me personally, deliberately choosing a "quit date" that means something to me, and then utilizing the time from now until that date to "gear up", mentally, emotionally, medically, etc. so that I am in the best possible state of mind, have as many supports already in place, and have thought through some of the issues in advance (created my game plan, so to speak) is what I feel will maximize my chances of success. While I understand that many will disagree, this is something that has worked for me in other areas of life, including kicking an 18 year addiction to smoking/chew/and later e-cigarettes, something that was surprisingly easier (but by NO means easy) than I thought it would be once I got into the right frame of mind. Anyway, my counselor and my wife both support my decision in this regard, so that's what we're going to do (absent some major change in the plan between now and March). I like to think of it as a professional boxing match (against alcohol and my relationship with it), something that I wouldn't dream of stepping inside the ring to fight without having tirelessly prepared well in advance.
As to some of your points that "today is the day to quit, not tomorrow!", I understand where you are coming from in saying that. I do. All I will say is that, for me personally, deliberately choosing a "quit date" that means something to me, and then utilizing the time from now until that date to "gear up", mentally, emotionally, medically, etc. so that I am in the best possible state of mind, have as many supports already in place, and have thought through some of the issues in advance (created my game plan, so to speak) is what I feel will maximize my chances of success. While I understand that many will disagree, this is something that has worked for me in other areas of life, including kicking an 18 year addiction to smoking/chew/and later e-cigarettes, something that was surprisingly easier (but by NO means easy) than I thought it would be once I got into the right frame of mind. Anyway, my counselor and my wife both support my decision in this regard, so that's what we're going to do (absent some major change in the plan between now and March). I like to think of it as a professional boxing match (against alcohol and my relationship with it), something that I wouldn't dream of stepping inside the ring to fight without having tirelessly prepared well in advance.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Lakeside, Arizona
Posts: 1,138
Some people don't actually quit the first time they stop, if this happens to you do you end up waiting for some new significant date or settle for one that's just some day?
There is only one moment, now. The future is always off in time somewhere you can't actually be. It's easy for alcoholism to convince people to wait just a bit longer for some moment that never comes.
There is only one moment, now. The future is always off in time somewhere you can't actually be. It's easy for alcoholism to convince people to wait just a bit longer for some moment that never comes.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 101
[QUOTE=tekink;7102521]Some people don't actually quit the first time they stop, if this happens to you do you end up waiting for some new significant date or settle for one that's just some day?
Unfortunately, I can't answer such a hypothetical, nor am I willing to assume that I'll fail and thus need to pick a "new significant date" or indefinitely delay my sobriety, as you seem to suggest. In fact, I'm going to assume the exact opposite...that I absolutely CAN and WILL do this! With all due respect, I've already explained where I'm at as far as a plan of action (and why). Without knowing literally anything else about me I'm kinda surprised to be met with what comes across as negativity and cynicism.
I'm here for whatever additional support I can find through SR, and I thank all of you for that!
Unfortunately, I can't answer such a hypothetical, nor am I willing to assume that I'll fail and thus need to pick a "new significant date" or indefinitely delay my sobriety, as you seem to suggest. In fact, I'm going to assume the exact opposite...that I absolutely CAN and WILL do this! With all due respect, I've already explained where I'm at as far as a plan of action (and why). Without knowing literally anything else about me I'm kinda surprised to be met with what comes across as negativity and cynicism.
I'm here for whatever additional support I can find through SR, and I thank all of you for that!
Ocean Lover!
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: You know nothing Jon Snow - UK
Posts: 2,604
Hi 5239guy, welcome to SR! Lots of great information here for building a plan to keep you sober so take a look around and get involved! x
You’ll find that most of us here have made multiple attempts to quit and it took quite a few tries to get it to stick. We all used various tricks to keep on drinking a little bit longer so please don’t think anyone is assuming you won’t quit first time! It can be done! However again many of us set a quit date, and never stuck to it. The addictive mind is a cunning beast and if it can convince us to carry on drinking a little bit longer it will, it will also come up with lots of seemingly rational reasons for not quitting today and waiting a bit. That’s how the addictive mind works and it’s pretty universal in my experience.
I don’t know your story or what has brought you here to SR but that is not important. What is important is you are here and your trying and we all have to start somewhere right?
Hope you stick around, it’s a great community and you’ll certainly get a lot of insights and tips to navigate your way along the path to sobriety xx
You’ll find that most of us here have made multiple attempts to quit and it took quite a few tries to get it to stick. We all used various tricks to keep on drinking a little bit longer so please don’t think anyone is assuming you won’t quit first time! It can be done! However again many of us set a quit date, and never stuck to it. The addictive mind is a cunning beast and if it can convince us to carry on drinking a little bit longer it will, it will also come up with lots of seemingly rational reasons for not quitting today and waiting a bit. That’s how the addictive mind works and it’s pretty universal in my experience.
I don’t know your story or what has brought you here to SR but that is not important. What is important is you are here and your trying and we all have to start somewhere right?
Hope you stick around, it’s a great community and you’ll certainly get a lot of insights and tips to navigate your way along the path to sobriety xx
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 101
Thank you MantaLady
I take all of your points, I really do. I don't think that I am some sort of "exception to the rule" (if there is such a thing), I just know what generally has worked for me and that is why I'm going about this the way that I am. Anyway, I am very glad to be here and look forward to sticking around for sure! Have a great weekend to you and everyone else!
I take all of your points, I really do. I don't think that I am some sort of "exception to the rule" (if there is such a thing), I just know what generally has worked for me and that is why I'm going about this the way that I am. Anyway, I am very glad to be here and look forward to sticking around for sure! Have a great weekend to you and everyone else!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: New England
Posts: 1,224
One of the most important tools you can have at your disposal is a plan to deal with the cravings. When they come, they are strong and assertive. You must be confident in the "why" you can no longer drink. Urges are the beginning of every relapse.
I suggest reading around. Especially newcomers section. You will read about them frequently and start to see a pattern in confronting them. And you will quickly figure out who some of our wisest and most seasoned members are. Their advise is sound because it comes from direct experience, and success.
Don't misinterpret any of the advise as confrontational or demeaning. We're all here to help you succeed. Sometimes the hardest advise to hear is the most honest.
Welcome to SR. You are amongst friends.
I suggest reading around. Especially newcomers section. You will read about them frequently and start to see a pattern in confronting them. And you will quickly figure out who some of our wisest and most seasoned members are. Their advise is sound because it comes from direct experience, and success.
Don't misinterpret any of the advise as confrontational or demeaning. We're all here to help you succeed. Sometimes the hardest advise to hear is the most honest.
Welcome to SR. You are amongst friends.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 568
Welcome! The last drink I had was December 24, 2017. I didn't pick that date it picked me. You will find so much support here. I couldn't have quit drinking if it wasn't for SR! Not all comments will be ooey gooey sweet but sometimes can be raw and sting a little bit. Please know they come from experience and concern. I had a few of the stinging comments made to me early in my journey of sobriety and at first I thought wow!, I can't believe he said that! Then later realizing they were just telling me things that were true and I didn't want to hear at that time. I think it's cool you got a plan! I just did it and didn't have much of a plan and I think if I had a plan it would have gone more smoothly. Again, welcome to SR and here's to the best alcohol free life!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 101
Hey @Finalround and @LadyBug66, sorry for the delayed response, I don't have a computer on the weekends. Thank you both for your insights and support. I'm glad to be among others who have been there-done that! And it's good to be reminded (I've gotten sober in the past) that not all of this is going to be "ooey gooey", as you put it LadyBug. Hope you both (and everyone else) are off to a great week!
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