Canuckleman45

Ok. Here we go guys. I have put another piece into my big jigsaw puzzle. My biggest issue? I have issues once I'm alone. Sounds weird I'm sure. If my wife, kids, work, gym, you name it........ if its there I'm awesome. NO issues . But once I have a little free time on my hands, well that train de -rails rather quickly. sometimes. I'm loving my new life, and even though I'm not 100% not drinking. 99.9999% is better than 0% . AA has been interesting as I've expanded where I go in the city for meetings. My city has meetings alot daily and I've expanded my boundaries. One tear ago I almost died. Alcohol wasn't the culprit but sure didnt help. That was I needed. From last year to now, I am 100% different, healthier, attentive, responsible, shall i keep going?

But why cant I watch sunday football tommorow not scared?

least

It takes time to adjust to a new routine. It will be hard at first, and you'll have to deliberately 'not drink' until not drinking is your new normal.

It comes down to whether you want to be sober or want to drink. Not easy, but simple. I wish you the best with your Sunday football.

lessgravity

Before I turned the corner (and I can't say exactly when it happened, I wonder if many of us really can identify that moment), it was the same for me. Of course I facilitated that alone time as much as I could as well. But yes, left to my own devices, what better than the sweet taste of oblivion.

But the more I told myself that no one was coming to save me, the more I got that deep in my bones, the more I was able to see that regardless of the circumstance my clarity and fidelity to a better way of life was going to my only way out.

No one is coming to save us man. But we can save ourselves.

Edit : I just reread your post and realize that you're still drinking. I can't do anything except suggest to you that you're only prolonging the inevitable. Either success in sobriety or all that comes with continuing to drink when you're someone like us.

Wishing you all the best with that decision, I hope you're one of the few that that works out for. I don't think there are very many though.

Dee74

Its impossible to make changes when we're still drinking...even .00001%

I tried, I think everyone did.

What I really wanted for most of my vacilliating years was to find my El Dorado - to drink and not have bad consequences.

It was only when I accepted that drinking and I had a toxic relationship, and always would; and accepted that the only way I could have the life I wanted and be the person I wanted to be was to be 100% sober 100% of the time, that things changed.

When you make that commitment it's not dependent on how you feel, what happened to you today, or where you are...it's watertight...whether you're in a crowd or on your own, watching TV or sitting in church.

I believe the commitment is one anyone can keep if they want it enough.

I'm not downplaying the difficultly - it's going to be hard for you to do certain things without drinking, at least for a while - but thats what support is for

D

Eddiebuckle

Because every time you drink, you are basically re-setting the clock of withdrawal, obsession and cravings. In my experience, it took months of continuous sobriety for the cravings to completely go away, and the first several weeks were the worst.

So, if you are drinking every couple of weeks or once a month, it’s as though you are subjecting yourself to a never-ending withdrawal. I don’t know what it’s like for you, but that seems like a ridiculous amount of effort only to choose to go through the worst of it all over again. In a word, it’s like choosing to be Sisyphus.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sisyphus

doggonecarl

Being alone makes you drink? Or do you drink because you are alone...and can do whatever your addiction wants?

Kind of sneaky, don't you suppose? Have the integrity to be sober, whenever.

DontRemember

As everyone has already stated; you're 'leaving your drinking option open' by still drinking. Just like a bad breakup and refusing to go no contact..each time contact is made the thoughts/feelings come rushing back and there we sit wondering "why?"..The "why?" is because we did 'it' again. Pretty simple really.

ScottFromWI

To get to 100%, you've got to eliminate the option of drinking any alcohol, ever. Your addiction is a master of justifying your drinking any way possible. Being alone, being mad, being happy, being sad, being with other people, being tired, being.... you get the point. They are all just excuses to keep drinking.

So the answer to your question is that you need to decide what your goal is. You already know where you will end up if you keep drinking - even if it's only .001 percent now. .001 turns into .1 and 10% and pretty soon 100%, that's just the way it is for us alcoholics. Yeah, it's scary but it's the reality.

least

For me, drinking became like Russian Roulette. I never knew if that was going to be the time all hell broke loose and something awful happened. Even if you only drink a little, that might be the time you hit a bad bottom. Take drinking off the table for good. You won't regret it.

courage2

In the spirit of keeping it simple...

So don't watch football tomorrow.

How bad will it be if you miss a game? Compared, say, to how bad will it be if you drink?

Go to an AA meeting instead. My guess is there will be a few other guys choosing not to watch football.

tomsteve

prolly because ya havent completely put down the bottle and worked at changing- untreated alcoholism.
meeting makers make meetings.
meeting makers that work the steps recover from alcoholism-every promise in the bb occurs at some point.

DriGuy

^^^I like this.

You have quit drinking when you finally quit drinking. Having a sip now and then or treating yourself to an occasional buzz should not be confused with quitting.

When you drink occasionally, you don't slide down a percentage point on the continuum each time. You go all the way down to zero, and fight your way through the early withdrawal again from scratch, which is the part I consider the worst part of withdrawal.

If a person doesn't want to quit, he can just keep starting over. If he gets good enough at it and eventually can do it without consequences, he could write a book and be famous, because millions and millions of alcoholics around the world desperately want to know how to do this.

August252015

In that same spirit of keeping it simple - and I say this compassionately, as I lived with a mother who did this and it's awful -

Being a dry drunk 99.whatever% of the time - ie that phrase untreated alcoholism - is just about worse on everyone, specifically you and the mindset and games us alcoholics play.

You gotta pick a team. Then the playbook on the how enters the picture.